iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
19,836 Blog Posts

Mr. Bill Ackman Has Initiated ‘Light Sabre Mode’

That’s it, VRX shorts. I have it under strong advisement that a certain Mr. William Albert Ackman has taken out his light sabre and is in the process of conducting a “thorough examination” into the whereabouts of the short sellers for “immediate disintergration.”

DO NOT KILL THE MESSENGER.

Although the market is a heaping pile of donkey shit, Mssrs W.A. Ackman has made it a point to “both punish and torture shorts of VRX in the style of the medieval.”

Again, NO HARM SHOULD BE ACCORDED TO THE MESSENGER.

Lastly, in the event you are short VRX and reading this message, I have a special directive for you.

Good Sir,

You’ve had your fun for the latter part of 2015, at the expense of W.A. Ackman. Now BEHOLD as he light sabres your face and cheeks about the street, ripping limbs from torso, torso from bone, bone from marrow. PREPARE TO MEET YOUR DECEASED RELATIVES IN THE AFTER-LIFE.

W.A.A.

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7 comments

  1. speerothekid

    W.A.A.A.A.A.A.A.A.A….

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  2. BlueStar: Contrarian Investor
    BlueStar: Contrarian Investor

    I have no doubt that Mr. Ackman and Mr. Pearson are conspiring to boost the stock. That’s why he bought more and the manufactured bullhit news comes out. I will be shorting into said news because it is likely that Mr. Ackman will be selling as well. I would encourage the SEC to look into the matter.

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  3. pb

    “The Force is weak with this One.” – Darth Vader

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  4. pb

    In favor of VRX and its ilk, it takes a long time to get FDA approval on anything, including generic substitutes. That needs to change; the sooner the better.

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  5. UncleBuccs

    Let’s hope that little nerd W.A.A. has his light sabre turned the right direction before deploying…

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  6. pb

    Just catching up on the newsfeed…. http://www.nytimes.com/2015/12/10/business/senators-condemn-big-price-increases-for-drugs.html

    According to this article, the vile nest of heartless vipers known as Valeant and Turing are endangering the lives of both emergency room patients and – wait for it – babies.

    Yeah, I want to be long those outfits. Break out the populist guillotines.

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