It’s Coming: Wait for It

Stocks are soft today, thanks in large part to the commodity related industries getting drilled into the ground.

I find myself inoculated from any semblance of pullbacks, heavily long BIDU–the great chinese lying company. I’d love to make money in American companies, stocks that attract the fattest amongst us (WTW); but I’ve been unable to find respite outside of the oil and gas space. Those stocks are being liquidated today, without honors.

All that aside, the daunting nature of climbing walls and hopping over barbed wired fences: this market is going the fuck higher.

LISTEN TO ME: the month of October ends with your face filled with candy corns, happy as a goat in a field of grass, long equities because Le Fly motivated you. Fuck your inhibitions and lack of courage. These are the times to take advantage of markets. I just liquidated the rest of my UNFI position. It served me well, having made 8% in the past few weeks in it. But it’t time to move on, so I added to my long bet on Randall J Kirk, via XON.

Any company that intends to genetically modify cats is a company I am in league with.

What a joyous occasion for so many of you flesh eating ball kickers.

Remember the good times when markets rolled and then rolled some more.

Its been a rough couple of month’s for Randall, as he hem and hawed over his lost fortunes, likely playing with his pet birds of prey, partaking in human anatomy experiments and things of that nature.

It’s important for you to know that “The Fly” was an arch advocate of Mr. Kirk last year, having bought his stock, XON, in the mid teens. I sold out and the stock doubled, only to come crashing back down in the great biotech debacle of 2015.

This is where I draw the line. Great biotech routs should always preclude the likes of great men, such as Randall. It is his god given right to enjoy the fruits of labor, bask in the glory of research, and to lead the life his was meant to lead.

In other words, I bought XON.

Congressman Boyle just tweeted that Joe “Einstein” Biden will run for President.

You have no idea how happy this makes me. Biden is one of the funniest people on the planet, without really knowing it. Plus, he looks like George Washington.

Oh you’re worried about his politics? Stop pretending your vote matters and accept that the Order of the Cinncinatus and House Dupont selects our Presidents for us, for they know more and work tirelessly to protect the empire of the United States, ensuring that the immigrant plebian class here do not interrupt their plans.

I remember the housing boom of 2005. This is not a 2005-like environment.

For one, my neighbors aren’t flipping homes. And, secondly, the number one gauge of a kick ass homebuilder market, the stocks of homebuilders, have been sucking wind–down 10% over the past 6 month.

Neverthless, the jackasses at the NAHB continue their doublespeak.

“This upward momentum shows that our industry is strengthening at a gradual but consistent pace,” David Crowe, chief economist at NAHB, said in a statement. “With firm job creation, economic growth and the release of pent-up demand, we expect housing to keep moving forward as we start to close out 2015.”

There are 3 homebuilder stocks that have shown outperformance over the past three months: NVR, CVCO and DHI. Both KBH and WLH are the most heavily shorted, with more than 25% of their respective floats sold short.

Just when you thought the IPO pipeline was dead, lo and behold the market went and rallied last week, leaving it wide open for a bunch of new fuckers to take advantage of it.

Brace yourselves. I know you’re chomping at the bit, dying to allocate clients, receive that concession you so eagerly deserve.

Higher

M&A news: CCG +19.7% (acquired by Harrison Street Real Estate Capital for $7.03/share, or ~$1.9 bln), PMCS +13.3% (MSCC proposes to acquire PMCS for $11.50/share, or ~$2.4 bln; says $SWKS bid sucks balls and theirs is the shit), DBD +3.3% (whatever).

WTW +58.9% (Fat lady named Oprah bought 10% and has option to buy another 5), CPXX +9.6% (FDA shit), ZFGN +9.1% (dead cat bounce), PLX +7.8% (positive data), OCN +7.5% (paying down a little debt; big fucking deal, right?), PLUG +5.6% (no one gives a shit), TSYS +2.6% (blah, blah, blah), DB +2.5% (German bullshit), NAT +2.5% (CRAMER PUMP), TKC +1.7% (mystery!).

Lower:

In reaction to disappointing earnings/guidance: MS -4.5% (fucked), VRX -2.3% (raises guidance; fucked nonetheless).

GNCA -32.2% (phase 2 fails; fucked), GLDD -15.6% (withdraws guidance; in other words, fucked), SDRL -5.8% (whatever), PBR -3.7% (they suck), ZINC -2.8% (miners fucked), FCX -2.4% (fucked), SUNE -2.2% (mystery;fucked)

Analyst comments: UBNT 3.3% (downgraded to shit at JMP Securities), ORCL -1.4% (downgraded to fucked at Pacific Crest), TEF -1.3% (downgraded to horrible from fucked at Credit Suisse), STX -1.1% (downgraded to blah from tits at Susquehanna).

Larry does it again.

It’s all bullshit anyway.

Chinese GDP came in at 6.9% v 6.8% expectations. Services now makes up more than 51%, which bodes well for our companies who sell crap to Chinese people. Chinese retail sales rose by 10.9% last month. On the other hand, Chinese industrials continue to struggle, which is why commodities have been stuck in a bear market. .

Copper, gold and oil haven’t moved on this data, nor have US futures.

In my opinion, these numbers are good enough to keep the Chinese boogeyman out from US closets, trying to scare the shit out of us while we’re trying to sleep.

That was fucking good. Admit it.

This is the week we rally. Bears will be humiliated again, stuffed into ‘fag boxes‘, then summarily kicked into outer space, never to be heard from again. “The Fly” is a champion of a bull’d up market, casting aside worried and panics as if they were childish theatre.

Everything is set for a fanatical run to the upside. Rates are low. Oil is firming. Biotech is bouncing. Shorts are feeling pressure to cover.

This is how I will play it, very simply (SPY is +4 since Exodus‘ oversold signal on Wednesday, by the way).

Being that I am 95% long, with very little in the way of fucks given, here are my top 5 positions.

BIDU

GILD

TWTR

SLCA

SHAK

Notice how I am not partaking in grave depravity, attempting to hit grand slams with no one on base. Being +15% for the year, I am merely looking for another 10% of upside, at which point I will then retire in the mountains of Romania, running amongst the goats and the rams–naked and feely without inhibitions.