iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
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Getting To Know… DPeezy

While it’s true the election is most likely over now that “The Fly” has endorsed Alpha, I’m publishing my interview with DPeezy anyway, so that you may be persuaded to visit his third-tier blog, and perhaps vote for him when the next election takes place. And, because he took the time to answer my “egregious” questions.

To help set the scene, just know that I was wearing a bullet-proof vest for the duration of the interview…

DT: Greetings, DPeezy. Nice gun… So, do you trade for a living? Or is it just a weird hobby of yours?

DPeezy: No…not quite as weird as Patches O’Houlihan drinking his own urine. But hey, he likes the taste & it’s sterile, so more power to him. I could (and have in the past) make a living without trading…but would it really be a life worth living? Probably not.

DT: Speaking of hobbies, what are your thoughts on pornography?

DPeezy: I am a student and a fan of all ‘classically trained’ actresses and their ‘works of art’.

DT: Okay, seriously, what kind of trading do you do? How often, and what instruments?

DPeezy: Let’s call it short-term options trading. Stocks are for asshats.

DT: What kind of ideas do you have about your tab? What will make your tab, “extra special?” and worth reading?

DPeezy: Momma always said, life is like a box of choc’lates. You never know what’chu gonna get. On the other hand, with me you know exactly what you can expect. Just look at the ‘King of the PG’ tab for the month of March. So you get to look forward to all of that, plus any and all improvements I may undergo personally & professionally.

DT: Who won the first Peanut of the Month award at IBC?

DPeezy: I believe it was the one they call ‘dinosaurtrader’. It is not known if he truly is a real dinosaur.

DT: In a related question, what’s the best third-tier stock market blog on the Internet?

DPeezy: The iBC ‘computer wizards’/’egregious Chinese communist bastards’ have blocked me accessing third-tier blogs. It sort of limits my internet-experience and thus am not in an educated position to answer this question. There was this guy once who told me about Dinosaur Trader’s blog, and about how cool it was as the undoubted third-tier stock market blog leader…but then I never saw that guy again and nobody seems to know what happened to him…

DT: Interesting… that explains a lot. There are odd, dark forces at work at iBC. Anyway, how old are you? Age discrimination applies here.

DPeezy: I was born the year of the last ‘full’ syzygy, when ALL the planets were on the same side of the Sun and in a straight line. Coincidence? I think not. It was also the year of the Falklands War, ‘The Play’ (Cal-Stanford), the first C(ompact) D(isk), the Commodore 64, and Michael Jackson’s Thriller. A great year, indeed.

DT: If you don’t trade for a living, what do you do?

DPeezy: I design flash memory chips. Not by myself, mind you, there’s a whole team, division, company…it’s the real deal. And there is an excellent chance that the mobile phone you’re using contains one of our products.

DT: Say something bad about another candidate. Go negative before they do… For example, Green Writer says you’re a “dick.” True story.

DPeezy: I don’t do smear campaigns. No snitchin’! True story.

DT: Okay, now assuming you don’t win, who would you like to see win? Remember, I’m not in the running. This is your chance to say something nice about another candidate.

DPeezy: ADawgg, GW, cuervoslaugh would all provide excellent & regular content. Perhaps we should do a coalition, like some European governments like to do.

DT: Is Ragin’s blog gay? If yes, why? If not, why not?

DPeezy: Don’t worry, he’s also ‘gay for you’. You two really should get a room. Or at least a shared tab.

DT: Maria Bartiromo or Erin Burnett?

DPeezy: I don’t watch CNBC. Too much yelling and general douchebaggery.

DT: John Lennon or Paul McCartney?

DPeezy: Yes. If only they had better taste in women…

DT: Is Hillary Clinton a “smelly pirate hooker?”
She’s the First & Foremost smelly pirate hooker. I heard that all the other smellies quit, since they obviously could not even approach her level of ‘pirate hookerishness’.

DT: Do you like “gangsta rap?”
DPeezy: Do you really have to ask? Take a quick look at my nametag (again) and take a guess. That’s what I thought.

DT: What the fuck is wrong with Ducati anyway?
Dpeezy: He was egregiously unloved during his formative years.

DT: Dennis Kneale?
Dpeezy: Same. No, wait…abusive father. Like that David Archuleta kid on Americal Idol.

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5 comments

  1. DPeezy

    Thanks for posting them at least, DT.

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  2. Sick of Lazy Mofos
    Sick of Lazy Mofos

    Late last night, after this interview, DT was found with six shots to the head, and dead on arrival.

    Bitches get stitches

    Hood Justice.

    FUCK DT

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  3. Dinosaur Trader
    Dinosaur Trader

    DPeezy,

    Actually, I hadn’t even finished this, but I had it in draft form “on the Fly’s desk” so I guess he wanted it published.

    You can tell that he hit “post,” and not me, because there was no fancy font styling…

    I was going to throw it in the PG and accuse the Alpha campaign of suppressing it.

    -DT

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  4. DPeezy

    I was wondering why I/it didn’t get the ‘full treatment’.

    Perhaps somebody did indeed suppress it. My guess was on BEAS, since he also tried a smear campaign…but Alpha? Surely not…

    I have a feeling that The Fly wanted to get rid of any and all traces of your occupation of his ‘office’. Can’t have those third-tier blogger germs around! At the least, he disinfected the desk, but I have a feeling that he just went and got a new one.

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  5. boca

    Good interview even without the fancy fonts. The recent iBC elections will have a prominent place in the annals of iBC history.

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