While it’s true the election is most likely over now that “The Fly” has endorsed Alpha, I’m publishing my interview with DPeezy anyway, so that you may be persuaded to visit his third-tier blog, and perhaps vote for him when the next election takes place. And, because he took the time to answer my “egregious” questions.
To help set the scene, just know that I was wearing a bullet-proof vest for the duration of the interview…
DT: Greetings, DPeezy. Nice gun… So, do you trade for a living? Or is it just a weird hobby of yours?
DPeezy: Noâ€¦not quite as weird as Patches Oâ€™Houlihan drinking his own urine. But hey, he likes the taste & itâ€™s sterile, so more power to him. I could (and have in the past) make a living without tradingâ€¦but would it really be a life worth living? Probably not.
DT: Speaking of hobbies, what are your thoughts on pornography?
DPeezy: I am a student and a fan of all â€˜classically trainedâ€™ actresses and their â€˜works of artâ€™.
DT: Okay, seriously, what kind of trading do you do? How often, and what instruments?
DPeezy: Letâ€™s call it short-term options trading. Stocks are for asshats.
DT: What kind of ideas do you have about your tab? What will make your tab, â€œextra special?â€ and worth reading?
DPeezy: Momma always said, life is like a box of chocâ€™lates. You never know whatâ€™chu gonna get. On the other hand, with me you know exactly what you can expect. Just look at the â€˜King of the PGâ€™ tab for the month of March. So you get to look forward to all of that, plus any and all improvements I may undergo personally & professionally.
DT: Who won the first Peanut of the Month award at IBC?
DPeezy: I believe it was the one they call â€˜dinosaurtraderâ€™. It is not known if he truly is a real dinosaur.
DT: In a related question, whatâ€™s the best third-tier stock market blog on the Internet?
DPeezy: The iBC â€˜computer wizardsâ€™/â€™egregious Chinese communist bastardsâ€™ have blocked me accessing third-tier blogs. It sort of limits my internet-experience and thus am not in an educated position to answer this question. There was this guy once who told me about Dinosaur Traderâ€™s blog, and about how cool it was as the undoubted third-tier stock market blog leaderâ€¦but then I never saw that guy again and nobody seems to know what happened to himâ€¦
DT: Interesting… that explains a lot. There are odd, dark forces at work at iBC. Anyway, how old are you? Age discrimination applies here.
DPeezy: I was born the year of the last â€˜fullâ€™ syzygy, when ALL the planets were on the same side of the Sun and in a straight line. Coincidence? I think not. It was also the year of the Falklands War, â€˜The Playâ€™ (Cal-Stanford), the first C(ompact) D(isk), the Commodore 64, and Michael Jacksonâ€™s Thriller. A great year, indeed.
DT: If you donâ€™t trade for a living, what do you do?
DPeezy: I design flash memory chips. Not by myself, mind you, thereâ€™s a whole team, division, companyâ€¦itâ€™s the real deal. And there is an excellent chance that the mobile phone youâ€™re using contains one of our products.
DT: Say something bad about another candidate. Go negative before they doâ€¦ For example, Green Writer says youâ€™re a â€œdick.â€ True story.
DPeezy: I donâ€™t do smear campaigns. No snitchinâ€™! True story.
DT: Okay, now assuming you donâ€™t win, who would you like to see win? Remember, Iâ€™m not in the running. This is your chance to say something nice about another candidate.
DPeezy: ADawgg, GW, cuervoslaugh would all provide excellent & regular content. Perhaps we should do a coalition, like some European governments like to do.
DT: Is Raginâ€™s blog gay? If yes, why? If not, why not?
DPeezy: Donâ€™t worry, heâ€™s also â€˜gay for youâ€™. You two really should get a room. Or at least a shared tab.
DT: Maria Bartiromo or Erin Burnett?
DPeezy: I donâ€™t watch CNBC. Too much yelling and general douchebaggery.
DT: John Lennon or Paul McCartney?
DPeezy: Yes. If only they had better taste in womenâ€¦
DT: Is Hillary Clinton a â€œsmelly pirate hooker?â€
Sheâ€™s the First & Foremost smelly pirate hooker. I heard that all the other smellies quit, since they obviously could not even approach her level of â€˜pirate hookerishnessâ€™.
DT: Do you like â€œgangsta rap?â€
DPeezy: Do you really have to ask? Take a quick look at my nametag (again) and take a guess. Thatâ€™s what I thought.
DT: What the fuck is wrong with Ducati anyway?
Dpeezy: He was egregiously unloved during his formative years.
DT: Dennis Kneale?
Dpeezy: Same. No, waitâ€¦abusive father. Like that David Archuleta kid on Americal Idol.