No, This Time We’re Really Going Higher

Promise.

Hey, most stocks are bid up sharply this morning, as the bulls say “fuck it,” and give it the “ol’ college try.”

Stocks like VMW, RIMM and AAPL are running higher, following the best, yet bewildering, “fuck you, you’re dead longs” tape, year-to-date.

As you know, the geriatric fuckers who sell stocks short will likely attempt to cane “The Fly” to death, sometime late in the day, via “buttloads” of random short sales.

However, this time I’ll be ready for them, as I sharpen this here blade and set a few traps near usual “old fucker” killing zones (stair cases).

Developing…

The Chinese Government won’t allow it.

More on this later.

As you already know, this may have a profound impact on Asian trading.

Developing…

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xJOGq5XTojo 450 300]

There is no navigating this market, unless of course you are long banana stocks–like CQB.

While some of you would like to blame “The Fly” for this heart attack tape, blame yourselves– fuck faces.

As you know, “The Fly” was programmed to be bullish on U.S. equities. This fucktarded, dickless tape has caused his software to malfunction, resulting in untimely purchases of retarded stocks.

All day, leadership names got lit on fire. Big losses were abundant in all of the material, energy and tech stocks.

Intra-day, stocks like HANS, VMW and GOOG were big time recipients of the “homo-hammer” of death.

Naturally, everyone is anticipating a bounce. Past short squeezes have made me hesitant to sell into this tape, much to my chagrin.

One thing is perfectly crystal clear: stocks are for asshats.

However, aside from managing “ridiculously ugly/busy websites,” it is my job to navigate this shit.

In short, work just got a whole lot tougher.

NOTE: CLX and other recession proof stocks keep marching higher.

NOTE II: We appear to be somewhat doomed.

NOTE III: If I hear “there are more shoes to drop” one more time, I will throw my fucking tv out the window.

Unfortunately, developing…

Trust me, being long RIMM, AAPL and other fun stocks, makes “The Fly” want to punch his trader/servant in the neck–a few dozen times.

However, understand what is going on, before making classic uneducated gambles.

Money managers are selling the high fliers, for a variety of reasons. You’ve got margin calls, redemption concerns and plain ol’ fashioned profit taking.

Understand something: your average money manager has the IQ of a small beetle. He knows nothing but price action, unable to decipher cheap from expensive, cool from Ducati.

Additionally, the hot tech money is finding a home in many beaten down sectors, especially retail.

The bottom line: should the nasdaq rally from here, do you really think it will leave RIMM, AAPL, GOOG, GRMN and VMW in the dust?

Exactly.

Right now, I am enjoying the bullish behavior of XFML, ahead of earnings tomorrow.

Also, assuming the oil fuckers rally again, UPL appears to be on sale.

Developing…

It looks like the “Chinese lotto fun” has been postponed, indefinitely.

Aside from the spastic dice rolls, quality names are getting lit up, like a synagogue in Baghdad.

Chinese stocks receiving the “homo-hammer” of death, include: CHCG, CHINA, JASO, FMCN, CN, SOLF, STP, CHL, CHU, CTRP, CSR, CHME, KUN, BIDU, SOHU, EFUT, EJ, GA, CTDC, FFHL, YTEC, ACH, AOB, PWRD, GLDN and LFT.

The whole lot of them.

If you didn’t know, you can profit from Chinese misery, via FXP (double inverse China short).

However, before doing that, the question you have to ask yourself is: “Am I feeling lucky, punk?”

My best guess, China misery will be short lived, especially if we rally today.

NOTE: If I wasn’t busy eating sandwiches, I might take a shot at FMCN, CN and LFT (again!), down at these levels.

UPDATE: Market tanking. Get back in the nuclear bomb shelter.

I must admit, being a full service type of guy, I despise those filthy hatfuckers at ETFC.

Sure, they’ll let you do cheap trades, until those assholes file bankruptcy–leaving your bullshit brokerage accounts in escrow.

Look you, if you are stupid enough to have 7 figures in an E-Trade account, I strongly suggest taking it out, just in case.

However, it’s worth noting, the stock may bounce from here–especially on a short squeeze.

As a result of ETFC‘s asshattery, SCHW and AMTD are picking up the pieces, via stellar price action. After all, should ETFC die, those fuckers benefit.

As of now, the rally is being led by airlines, homies, retail and trannies.

If I was going to throw dice at a sector, for a trade, I’d look to retail, ahead of “credit card season.”

Within the group, I like JCG, SKX, COH and JWN.

Also, as “fat fucker day” arrives (Thanks Giving), food and beverage stocks may run.

There, I like WBD, WFMI, KR and HANS on a pullback.

If you are looking to play the restaurant sector, BWLD and MSSR look cheap.

Finally, the tech sector is not doing too well, with BIDU, RIMM and GOOG  in the red. My guess, investors are selling expensive names and going bargain shopping, which ironically is creating a bargain in tech.

Right here, I like FMCN, RIMM, VMW and LFT.

However, it’s worth mentioning, “The Fly” will not buy anything today. I bought lots of shit last week, in the midst of the “inferno of fun.” For now, I’ll be waiting for a short killing rally, while eating this here bowl of oatmeal.

NOTE: Ever since that LFT (Longtop Financial) shit came public, the market has been in the shit box. An ominous name, indeed.

Is it any surprise?

As you know, we are due for some sort of space magic type bounce, considering the relentless selling of last week.

Also, the shorts are way over zealous, selling big banks below or near book value.

Again, with my money, I want to be long the banks for the upcoming short squeeze, which will be brutal.

Within my positions, the big stand out is HANS. That fucker has booked almost 10 points, since its earnings day massacre.

Considering the recent run, I don’t want to buy more HANS here. Wait for a dip.

My guess, the market sprints 2% today, effectively “de-balling” the jerk offs who shorted into Friday’s close.

On this bounce, CFC, BWLD, VMW,VMI, GRMN, and MVIS are worth a look.

Finally, my fucking “shotgun to the head pick,” VMI, is starting to piss me the fuck off, with its queer price action.

Don’t you fuckers know there isn’t going to be enough fresh water supplies to sustain the fucktarded population growth in the world, short term?

Milk the farmer. He has loads of money.

This site is not like other financial websites. So, if you came here for serious, bullshit commentary on the markets, please fuck off– and go for a swim in your local reservoir.

Look you, “The Fly” is an evolved version of you. Some might call him a “space alien magician” or “Human 2.0.” To simplify matters, just recognize the obvious: you’re here reading this shit, while I’m counting gold bricks or eating fantastically large bowls of oatmeal.

As you already know, this website will be sold for millions of euro’s (“The Fly” no longer accepts dollars)– down the road.

On my old blog, I interviewed numerous “weekend bloggers” and decided to “hire” the two who stood out most: Danny and Woodshedder.

Danny makes cool vids and Wood plays with charts and shit.

Enough about them.

Oh, before I forget, “Mr. Bilderberg” will be offering his idea’s, whenever his busy schedule permits. In short, Bilderberg makes “The Fly” uneasy, mainly due to his net worth being considerably higher– and is on the cusp of the Fortune 400 list. He also “controls” lots of important people.

He will remain anonymous, indefinitely. Fuck him.

Jeremy built this fucking site, by himself, from the dirty, filthy cellars of Yahoo hosting, to the wonderful palace called Webstrike Solutions (free plug). Let me just say, Jeremy is one heck of a programmer and will be spared, whenever “The Fly” decides to start having you fuckers arrested.

Finally, we have created “The Peanut Gallery.”

The Peanut Gallery is a place where anyone can apply to post their fucktarded thoughts and opinions on financial matters. Once approved, you will be free to post whenever you like.

However, it’s worth noting, should your syntax and content slip a bit, “The Fly” will set fire to you quicker than a blow torch in a Valero gas refinery.