Fuck Commercial RE

There is no way on God’s green earth commercial RE companies will keep their share prices intact. Quite honestly, as opposed to outright lying, it makes me sick to see Vornado Realty Trust [[VNO]] , SL Green Realty Corp. [[SLG]] , Simon Property Group, Inc [[SPG]] and Boston Properties, Inc. [[BXP]] so rich in value.

Their market caps deserve to be sliced in half, as their tenants file for bankruptcy and their lines of credit dry up.

As always, getting long [[SRS]] , sub $85, is a great idea.

Oil is entirely done. I really have no interest in trying to bottom fish commodities anymore. In retrospect, I was wrong. Time to move on.

The banks are doing great, based upon news of nothing. And, tech is getting punched in the scrotum by Zeus.

Right now, I am too busy to even think straight. I’ll get back to you fuckers later, with an idea or two.

NOTE: His middle name really is King. You-can’t-make-this-stuff-up.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YEDM3V-Tf80 450 300]

That was sweet. The great panic of 2008 is over. Nothing to see here people. Carry on and get in line for your government bailout.

You do know the bailout haters will point to today’s insane stock market rally as further evidence against the need for urgent government assistance in the credit markets, right? The tax payer, who happens to be the Wall Street “fat cats” and successful business men, does not need no stinkin’ bailout.

As for me:

I was flat for the day, with losses in [[SRS]] and gains in a variety of old legacy longs, like Research In Motion Limited (USA) [[RIMM]] .

Looking back, I guess it was stoopid [sic] of me to sell in the midst of sheer panic. However, I get rattled quickly when markets swan dive. I am a big believer in the end of the world.

But, I refuse to sell my 15,000 Wachovia Corporation [[WB]] , despite the fact that they will not be able to keep a balanced book. They need to reduce debt. My guess, Morgan Stanley [[MS]] , or some other asshole, will eat the rest of Bob Steel’s bullshit funhouse. From what I hear, some very astute investors on the yahoo message boards feel WB is worth $15!!!

Yummy.

In closing, I am burnt out. I need to indulge in some sort of meaningless exercise in futility. Knowing that my faculties are temporarily offline, I have decided to stay away from the market.

Sometime soon I will snap out of my stupor and commence rolling on you fat fuckers, as if my name was “Fat Fucker Killer.”

Wall Street has twisted the arms of our regulators into changing the accounting standards (FASB), in order to hide toxic assets, indefinitely. This is a great idea, circa Japan 1990’s.

My guess, in an weird twist of lunacy, the market will close the day up 777 points, effectively tricking everyone into neatly fitted sleeveless dinner jackets.

I love it. Yesterday the end of the world was upon us; today, gamblers are back at the table drinking shots of bourbon.

My present asset allocation is neutral. I sold off many longs, erroneously mind you, yesterday, while buying up blocks of [[SRS]] , as if my head was attached to an automatic SRS buying machine—sort of like a diabolical robot, low on efficient wiring.

I swear on a stack of NY Mets baseball cards, I will not execute any trades today. I do not trust the market and believe congress, somehow, will fuck us again.

If you didn’t sell yesterday, take today’s bump to lighten up or hedge up a little.

Ever since the market crashed and shit, all of you asshats think you are Warren Buffett or Peter Lynch, extending world saving ideas.

Do me a favor and shut the fuck up. No one gives a fuck (or a fiddle) about your unseemly ideas, for they are filled with rank shit and tumultuous pig snot.

Some of you enjoy bailouts, while some of you are very much opposed. Who cares?

It’s sort of like jibber jabbering over romaine versus iceberg lettuce: they both suck.

If any of you have any money losing ideas, feel free to talk amongst yourselves. Personally, I have vendettas to commit to and large scale wars to undertake. There will be no rest for Senior Tropicana, until the balance of the Earth’s coin spills into his highly polished antique ashtray.

Some of you might ponder: “Dear Sir, what shall we buy now?”

My answer, unfortunately, is for you to go fuck yourself. I know it’s a really bad blogging stratagem. But then again, I really don’t care.

In closing, I am worried over Bob Steele. I understand he only has 7 homes. How much can one man endure? The pain must be insufferable.

Give that man a platinum parachute and God Bless America.

Pardon me for not giving a fuck. I am filled with disdain and abject indifference to the daily fluctuations of Wall Street. Following yesterday’s fuckfest, I have opted to just sloth around the office, throwing metal bricks at people.

For all you Main Street fuckers interested in a little credit extension, pardon my colleagues in the banking industry who will soon rip your heart out, at fireside, while gingerly sipping on a fine aged cognac.

Sadly, I am up today, with my bullshit longs up and [[SRS]] . I was hoping to lose several million. That was so fucking fun, I could hardly believe it actually happened.

What’s my top pick?

Hey, how about Bob Steele’s company Wachovia Corporation [[WB]] ? Really, what are the odds they will go out of business twice? Seems like a no fucking brainer.

As you can tell, I am gleeful with glee over not selling any during yesterday’s smörgåsbord of fantasy stock market. It’s as if my fellow banking colleagues were investing with counterfeit money, with all of their nonchalant capital losing ways.

In closing, “The Fly” can give two gay goats and a fiddle about today. For all I care, “The Obama Man” can go to congress and punch everyones eyebrows off, while offing a cigar on McCain’s head, if that makes any sense.

My top pick, as always, is caffeine.

More on this later.

I have accepted the stupidity of America. You all know I have been a major hater of the banks. I dislike the CEO’s of our banks as if they were responsible for making my appendix burst. However, I knew, given the situation, the market would crater, without government assistance.

I understand the philosophical and moral opposition to the bailout. Why bail out Wall Street fat cats? Hell, we have gotten too lazy and decadent. It’s time to prepare for some great depression type era.

All of that resonates with my inner evil. But, it’s entirely nonsensical, if you actually take a minute to think about the repercussions.

Your banks will close and never reopen. Jp Morgan and Bank of America will not be able to buy every bullshit bank. The Fed and FDIC will fold tent and reopen as a popsicle stand. Your (low end) job is in jeopardy. Actually, your fucking grocery stores will shut down.

Many of you say “this was going to happen with or without the bailout, so let it burn.” Yeah, that might be true. Actually, I know it is. However, what the fuck are we retarded idiots? If we know what the problem is, the least we can do is try to resolve it. Apparently, our ballot box fuckers thought we needed a little tough medicine. They say: “this is the normal business cycle.”

Oh really?

Tell me how this “normal business cycle” feels when your fucking farm is seized by creditors and your local Mcdonalds shuts the fuck down, due to a credit line explosion.

This is irresponsibility on an epic level. I will now embrace it.

As for my portfolio:

I reduced my risk to nil. I took tremendous losses today, which is doubly sickening since I have been calling for this exact scenario for more than a year. At the present, I have equal shorts to longs. Therefore, I cannot “enjoy” another down 10% afternoon.

So, in closing, today’s market decline cost the “american (idiot) taxpayer” $1.4 trillion in capital destruction. Let me see, $700 billion is less than $1.4 trillion, right?

The good news: we’re not done yet. Should the BBQ eating idiots from “Main Street” continue to dominate policy, this market is going to 8,000 Dow, faster than Bob Steele golden parachutes the fuck out of this bullshit country.

Get ready for deflationary pain.

UPDATE: Looking around the wonderful world of internet blogs, most right wing sites are against the bailout, mainly because they are idiots. Liberals are always down for a little government intervention; so they are worthless. One guy is going against his audience, in support of some bailout fun.

Unfortunately, not everyone understands the ramifications. Again, they are idiots.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qXVX2zzHxeg&feature=related 450 300]

Across the board, I blew out of equities today. It doesn’t really matter what the fundamentals or cost basis is; it’s done. I have no desire to play a game of political chicken with moronic corn cob fuckers.

It’s very hard to play the next move. Logic dictates the market will crash through the fucking floor boards, as the best and biggest financial system crumbles into very small pieces of fuckery. However, do not doubt the assholish of Congress and their ability to vote again and win!

Geez, we could be up 1,000 on a new bailout win.

Nonetheless, it makes sense to cut losses here and wait for things to settle down. Or, if you are unable to liquidate, at the minimum, get long some [[SKF]] , [[FXP]] or [[SRS]] .

Personally, this is a very disheartening day. I nailed the credit crisis from day 2 (JakeGint nailed day 1) and have been positioned for such an egregious day, for more than a year—until last week. Fuck, I even changed the header on my blog to indicate my newly minted bullish tone.

Aside from physically abusing people around me, I have accepted my loss, like a NY Met, and will move on to repair damage.

Remember, during times like this it’s important to limit risk. The downside to the indices are still severe. We can see the Dow slip another 2,000 points, easy. The credit markets are insane, as people with money pile into treasuries. If you are out there, gambling like a fucking Atlantic City alcoholic, I commend your endowment.

Unfortunately, for me, Bob Steele cut my balls off with a ginsu knife, with special assistance from the commodity, tech and credit market ape rapers.

NOTE: Commerical Re stocks should continue to slide, as borrowing costs increases. With that in mind, [[SRS]] is a fucking golden parachute.