iBC Bids Farewell to Danny

Nah, I’m just fucking with you. Alphadawg is going on vacation/life journey and will not have time to fuck around with the internets. Despite never speaking to Alpha in real life, I greatly appreciated his efforts to iBC and PPT. He was a true professional and will be missed, in a very non-gay, testosterone laden way.

Should he decide life just isn’t the same, without the internets, Alpha can have his blog back whenever he wants. In the meantime, I will convert his blog into THE ALPHADAWG MUSEUM OF FINANCE and EGREGIOUS TRADING ACTIVITY, for all new iBC’ers to visit.

Alpha: you will be immortal my friend.

As for today’s tape, I made “fuck you money” in a variety of names, including an intra-day purchase of UNG, posted in real time, on  The PPT.

Also, I had gains in [[ATHR]], [[DELL]], [[ARD]], [[MWA]], [[FITB]], [[ENTR]], [[FNSR]] and [[SIFY]].

I regret selling [[ERX]], [[CROX]] and [[LVLT]]. However, that’s life.

Regarding LVLT, the company is definitely a takeover target. Starting next quarter, they will be cash flow positive and would make a ton of sense for [[S]] to just swallow them whole.

At the point in the rally, I am no longer looking for themes or new angles on how to play the tape. I have shifted my focus from “aggressive degenerate” to “how do I keep these gains, without being a pussy?”

In short, I need to start taking profits. I started selling yesterday, via my 2nd largest long: ERX. I suspect this rally will continue, providing the dollar/oil relationship continues. Into strength, I will lock in 75%+ gains and step aside or get small.

My goal is to be in a 50%+ cash position my July 4th. Until then, bearshitters: fuck off.

NOTE: As of 3:47pm, “The Fly” was up another 1.75%.

You sit at your desk, with sweaty palms and a messed up hair do. Your enemy, the ASSHOLE MARGIN CLERK, approaches. She wants you to “magic jack” out of your positions, due to a potentially dangerous negative equity situation.

See, you’ve been shorting the nasdaq, via QID, for more than a month. It was your belief that the United Steaks of Fat Ass Americans were going to stop eating, drinking and wasting money on $500 shoes. In retrospect, you now realize how woefully wrong you are, short into the teeth of the sharpest reflation efforts in U.S. history.

Unfortunately, it is a lesson paid for with your soul, alongside your bullshit brokerage accounts.

The game is over. The clerk is taking matters into her own hands, since you chose to hide unde your desk, like a little bitch. Gleefully, she will liquidate your bullshit QID position at the least opportune time. She will wait for it to print a new intra-day low then fill your market order.

The moral of the story: never bet against the man in the time machine.

Top picks: UNG, ARD, FTK

I always say: “it’s not a game anymore,” because it isn’t. If I was a 5 year old, I’d take large permanent purple markers and graffiti your face, for being so stupid.

You’re the Donald “Bankruptcy Expert” Trump of this stock game, while I am Ty “steel tips in your chest” Cobb, but with an aluminum bat—not that wood shit. It’s like I’m hitting small rubber balls with a clown sized titanium bat; and you’re running into Wrigley field-esque brick walls trying to catch them.

With the mini melt up this morning, I like FiTB, FNSR and ATHR. Naturally, I am talking my own book.

On dips, I like FTK, TRID and MWA.

Bottom line: dollar down + oil up= fire your phone company, I’ll see you next time. Oh, and I will see you bearshitters later, around 2ish, when your margin clerks start magic jacking out of your positions, effectively throwing gasoline on today’s rally fire.

and…

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cjtEQjLwqf4 616 450]

I am too good to address you hapless bastards directly, so I will talk to myself.

Tropicana: Hey Fly, you did pretty good today, especially with your egregious FTK positions. The bears really do suck goat balls, you have to agree.

Fly: Yeah, I agree fuckernutter. But, I also think that you should shut the fuck up and quit trying to be my friend. If you need a friend, go feed the homeless. The way I see it, I win all the time, while you just sort of roam around the office all the time, dressed in that faggot robe and sandals.

Tropicana: (takes a swing at Fly, but misses)

Fly: Ha, ha. I win again. (throws contents of diamond encrusted chalice on Tropicana’s face)

Tropicana: Fine. Have it your way. Just know this, the next time your picks go bad, don’t come crawling back to me, begging like a little bitch, all worried and shit about your homo stocks.

Fly: I don’t need the likes of you. You are a fucktard, best suited for hospitals, getting your appendix ripped from your torso.

Tropicana: On the contrary, my little insane friend. You are a big mouth show off, who would not last a minute in the S. Bronx, without having to give up the car keys to your bullshit Lexus.

Fly: Fuck off, jelly donut man. I bank coin. I’d rather fuck an aardvark than drive my car into the S. Bronx.

Tropicana: Well, I’ll have you know, I was up 5.55% today, stretching— mind you— my year to date gains to north of 75%.

Fly: Oh, yeah, well, I was up, ummm, 5.55% too.

Fly & Tropicana: Asshole (spoken simultaneously)

The beige book data indicated economic contraction, into early May. However, there were signs of a rebound in housing. Nonetheless, the data was Yankee bullpen shitty, with the overall theme pointing towards deflation.

Well, shiver me timbers, oil is breaking the necks of lower class commuters and the metals are acting as if “global growth” is back in full force. I realize, deep down, the next sick trade will be on the short side. I am sure there will be an empty elevator drop over the next 3 months. My plan, as always, is to be in cash, during such said events.

There is so much money being printed now; it will be hard to stop this runaway train. The new money is not only plugging holes, but chasing assets. It’s obvious, as well as evident, those fiat dollars are chasing stocks, like a gorilla in a banana tree.

There is nothing legitimate or legal about what world governments are doing, via manipulating prices. But, as a manager of assets, my job is to determine the future move in equity valuations, not bitch and moan about the fucked up nature of the collective printing presses.

My money is better off alongside the criminals than with the likes of you, which in a fucked up way makes me an accomplice to a crime against humanity. Try and catch me, see what happens, fuckface. I’ll knock your sideburns to the front of your head, then off.

Top picks: FTK, OVTI

Dollar strength (UUP) is contributing to this mornings sell off. In addition, a lot of leadership names (AAPL, INTC) are selling off here. Due to this development, I sold out of my 2nd largest position, ERX, in order to raise cash. Plus anyway, with FTK, SD and ARD longs, I have ample exposure to the energy space. I will not miss a beat.

I intend to use this dip as a buying opportunity, for I believe it will be short lived. At the top of my buy list are the following names: ENTR, ATML, TRID, CNXT, FNSR and GLW.

Keep in mind, when buying piece of shit stocks, like the names mentioned above, it’s important to do so in moderation. I do not intend to buy an obscene amounts of stock, instead, just enough to average in or bulk up my position to make them respectable and in-line with current prices.

Not to beat on a dead horse, but the volume and price action in FTK is very noteworthy. I suspect the company is not on its death bed. As a matter of fact, I suspect the company is in a good position to turn things around, providing they are afforded appropriate funding.

You don’t need to agree with everything that I say and do. As a matter of fact, I encourage all to think on their own, try to make your own fishing pole, then fucking fish with it. However, don’t ever cross me, for if you do I will make sure your life is a living hell and/or you lose in a very egregious way.

Case in point: FTK

There are laughing clowns, not to be confused with the raping or killing type, that have bet against me in FTK, continuously, via large short sales. Heck, the short position is upwards of 20% and the fucking stock price is nailed to the floorboards. Yet, here we are, on a glorious “non-Africa hot” Tuesday morning and FTK is running lawn mowers over their faces.

All you need is a little push in the right direction and all of the chips will fall into place.

Aside from FTK, I am a chicken dinner winner in FITB, ATHR and OVTI. To be honest, I don’t know why anyone is short OVTI. For the love of pin-less hand grenades, they have close to $5 in net cash and their cameras are in the new iphone. You have to be a fucking lunatic to be short. My sense, the stock hits $20 by Labor Day.

Finally, the dollar is up, while oil is up; something has to give. I would not be surprised to see the dollar go negative and the Dow sprint higher by triple digits. At the moment, I am up another 2.3% intra-day.

UPDATE: Due to dollar strength, I sold out of my ERX position, just north of $38.

The market is about to knock your fucking head clean from your shoulders. As an aside, scoot on over to Uncle Fucker’s blog. Jake has taken it upon himself to fuck with my writing dominance, here on iBC, via an egregiously funny script.

To further my aside thinking, it’s AFRICA HOT in THE HOUSE OF FLY tonight, thanks in large part to my central cooling system breaking the fuck down, via an assholish/very untimely electrical short in the fan motor.

Back to the main subject. Here are the top ranked stocks, per sector, courtesy of The PPT.

Basic Materials

Consumer Goods

Finanacials

Healthcare

Industrial Goods

Services

Tech

Utilities

UPDATE: Rogers on the markets.