BEHOLD: iBankCoin Wealth Strategies, Issue 3

ibc_report_issue3 –

No man knows what he is doing, more than me, in the entire galaxy.

Think about that, while sucking on a few lemons.

UPDATE: “You’re internet hot”

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pTy-4YRRwdY 616 450]

It was a great game, watching the Goldman Sachs robots battle the UBS robots for market dominance today. At the end, the GSbots edged out UBS, via an egregious buy program on the Dow 30, effectively “Joshing” all shorts into the bell.

Please avoid the low hanging fruit of [[FAZ]], for they are poisonous.

I had a good week, with big dicked gains, enabling me to have visions of grandeur, aiming for triple digit returns. Howsoever, I am sure Mother Market has a few brass knuckled punches in store for my face, so I may need to slow my roll—bet against myself or some shit.

The action in technology is the best since the dot com days, let it be known. Stocks like [[AAPL]], [[RIMM]], [[ALU]], [[RFMD]], [[ARUN]], [[CSCO]], [[BRCD]] etc, run higher every fucking day.

“The Fly” has a specific road map plotted out, in order to protect his gains and clear the way for an epic/record year.

It was a great week and yes, “The Fly” wins again.

A lot of chatter, regarding mortgage rates and the prospect of the Fed raising interest rates, is contributing to intra-day weakness. There is no fucking way the Fed is going to raise rates. People are just looking for reasons to sell.

Truth be told, most investors have no idea why they are long. Most money managers are chasing performance, trying desperately to show good quarterly gains to their idiot investors.

With the dollar spiking, oil down and banks weak, we are setting up for a down day. If you need to commit capital, try to do so during the final 10 minutes of trade. The market is up 11 of the past 13 weeks. Needless to say, we are due for a minor pullback, before melting short sellers to a cinder.

At the moment, my preferred longs are GLW, OVTI, ATHR, TRID, ENTR, FTK, ERX, IR ARD and FNSR.

I bought 15,000 @ $2.08.

Disclaimer: If you buy TRID because of this post, your boss will walk over to your desk, short after reading this, and fire you. And, you may lose money.

This is a Fantasy Island market, where all of your wishes come true. All of the recent buying, bidding up the Dow by 40%, was validated with today’s better than expected employment number. This is how it works, in small increments. We are trying to turn around a 12 trillion (or 13, who’s counting) economy. It takes time.

Thus far, during today’s trading session, all I have been hearing and seeing is denial. People are selling because they do not believe the numbers. That’s fine. Let people sell off on good numbers; I will buy the dips.

With that in mind, today’s intra-day action is somewhat bearish. I can sense the fuckery, whereby people are intent on seeing the market close in the red. However, I still believe, it is worth the risk being long here. The news is just too good and the momentum is undeniable.

An old favorite, MVIS, is popping today, based on rumors that the company is set to unveil an OEM partner, possibly AAPL. For the record, I still own a token 10,000 shares, mainly for sentimental reasons.

Within my positions, I am most impressed with FITB, ENTR, IR and TRID.

If forced, by gun point, to choose a stock, I’d buy TRID, then proceed to take a nap, shortly thereafter.

UPDATE: Just to quell MVIS requests, all I heard was a “strategic partnership is possible” which would eliminate the need for the company to raise new capital. I am not buying the rumor.

You have to cut out the cancer, as if that shit was on an accelerated path, eating away at your liquor laden liver. There’s negativity everywhere—especially here— on the interwebs, where everyone thinks it is their right to be an internet gazillionaire. These people walk around, naked, with beer cans in their sweaty palms, typing inane/retarded shit into their computer box, then subsequently spinning unnoticed, like an Italian burglar, trying to steal from aliens.

So you know, I’ve been grizzled since birth, accustomed to the art of doublespeak by people with crooked noses, who carry face masks and whiskey bottles in the drunks of their stolen cars.

As for the market, we’re in the midst of one of the Godliest runs of all time. I need the standards raised here, else I am going to start going bizerko on some of you fuckers. I don’t want to hear shit about your little toppy ideas about when or if the market will collapse. I want ideas, like RC and CA, on a daily basis, else you need to fuck off and go somewhere else.

Into the oil spike, I will ride my ERX position (#2 by size in my portfolio) into the 40’s and urinate gasoline on those who are short FTK.

To sum up this post, I will quote a great man: “I will viciously snatch your chain and ruin your bullshit career.”

SPECIAL UPDATE: Some necessary wisdom for some of you ingrates.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A1vMpkIRAjo&feature=related 616 450]

This is the easiest tape, since the days I was eating shrimp cocktails at my desk, while buying blocks of CMGI and ATHM.

Please, put aside your market bias. Put aside your hatred for the gold chained one. Put aside your love for retarded panic bloggers and get long.

Get long, as a ways to avoid the Sun chasing you around the universe, trying to fry your face off. Get long, as if to avoid accidentally breaking Angelo Mozilo’s tanning bed. Get long because the Gods of logic and reason, all found within The House of Fly, said so.

Top pick: TRID

BREAKING NEWS OF THE EXCLUSIVE SORT:

Pic of Angelo Mozilo, future prisoner of assrape prison, delivered to iBC: