UNSUSTAINABLE

TLT is north of $130 and stocks are barely down. This, of course, is fucking horseshit and something will give soon. You cannot have a massive flight to quality and higher stock prices. The world as we know it doesn’t work like that.

On one hand, I don’t want to miss out on all of the gay (no homo) fun. But on the other, big red lights are flashing in my head, screaming DO NOT BUY, as TLT punctures new highs.

The only sector that might do well, even in a calamitous decline, is gold/silver. According to the textbook, they should be getting their brains blown out, right about now. Deflation is not exactly a good thing for inflationary hedges. However, investors these days seem to take a different approach to precious metals. They’re being used as de-facto currencies and the miners are levered bets.

I still like EXK here.

In summary, this is fucking hedonism, you pigs. You cannot have your cake and eat it too.

To be perfectly blunt with all of you, I was not enthused, nor enmoured, by the specter of moving my headquarters. It was a perfectly good spot, surrounded by murderers and thieves, hidden amongst the asinine absurdity that is Staten Island. My new locale is in the region of Princeton, NJ. My neighbors are not to be trusted and I am sure they’ve never been arrested for a felony crime.

After 3 years of intense searching, this seems to be the only place in the entire northeast region of the United Steaks that suits me.

The move went according to plan. I hired 7 movers and two 32 foot trucks to haul my shit. All of that, AND MORE, cost me under $3,500, including tip. That’s what I call money well spent.

Now that I’m here, I find myself obsessing over the smallest details, such as lack of a proper hose in the garage and lack of any hose spout or water supply in the backyard. WHO THE FUCK HAS A YARD WITHOUT A FUCKING HOSE IN THE BACKYARD? Plus, I have to paint the entire interior of the house over,install crown molding, paneling, have an electrician inspect, repair and install new systems, renovate 3 bathrooms, install new floors in all 6 bedrooms–just to name a few things that will be driving me nuts over the next 6 months.

Plus, for the fucking life of me, I cannot get this lawn irrigation system to work. And, there aren’t enough sprinklers in the ground.

My life was perfectly fine before this shit. I told Mrs. Fly “I don’t need this shit. I’m busy bowling on fuckers and generally winning all day long. Moving me from this shit hole is equal to tearing down Yankee Stadium. I’m the Babe Ruth of this bitch; don’t fuck with me.”

She just sort of scowled at me, declined my suggestion, then walked out.

I write to you all from my laptop, using my mobile hotspot, as this fuckhead of a house doesn’t have phone, cable or anything yet. Fuck, I’m practically living like a gentleman from the 18th century. I might as well pull out the old calash, attach some black steeds to it, and ride into the night, top hat and cane in hand.

With regards to the market: I’m gonna have to get back to you on that one later.

Here are the top 10 short squeezes ranked by technical score inside The PPT.

Major accolades go out to my friend “The Devil” and his managing partner “Chuck Bennett” for their meticulous call in VHC, long from $15. I pointed this story out to you about a month ago and it is now the most popular stock inside of The PPT. I am glad to see so many doing well and look forward to your thanks and praise in the not so distant future.

My silver stock, EXK, is down; but I own other things too. The problem with the vast majority of you is more about your brains, less about monetary standing. You can diversify into different industries; but you are financial abortionists, only interested in vagrancy and belligerent/obnoxious gambits. Take your dice elsewhere, Sir, for they are not welcomed in these quarters.

With the market shooting ahead, I am up a mere 0.5%, partly due to my 40% cash position. I am inclined to stay in a cash heavy position, not due to an aversion to risk, because I am moving my manour to the state of New Jersey. Once settled in, I will conduct operations on a magnanimous scale to outstrip my foes and skin their heads from their skulls. After that is officiated, I am going to crush their bones into dust and sprinkle it on my lawn to fertilize the earth.

In summary, today’s victory belongs to “The Devil” and the venerable “Chuck Bennett” for their mastery in positioning into VHC, through stock and calls. As a result of their persistence, a great many of you have attached to their backs, like small fish to sharks, receiving free chum along the way.

Activity Board inside PPT

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=imbwn6iVryQ

If you are baffled by this rally it is because you do not own any bank stocks. If you do not own any bank stocks, you are a normal person. Mr. Dimon, from JPM, won again, completely fucking any and all shorts who bet against him into earnings. Do not lament over your positions lagging behind, for the market itself is in great health and condition. It will only be a matter of time before your stupid stocks increase in value.

I am up today; but my gains are measured. It doesn’t really matter, frankly. Either way, I expected my holdings to be little changed whether the market was +180 or -180. What’s important to note and remember is the overall trend.

Good Sir, we are decidedly higher and have melted the faces off of our enemies and now design to use them as wax for our banquet room candles.

They are being manned by dwarfs, cutting off the dicks of those who bet against Ben.

Based upon the laws of mathematics, you’ve been chequemated, yet again.

With grace and on behalf of professional money managers everywhere, I accept today’s gains and will donate a portion received to the ORBITAL SPACE CANNON PROJECT (OSCP), to be used for offensive purposes only.

If you think your day is going bad, short stocks like some sort of lemon head, take solace in knowing your local farmer is on the cusp of absolute ruin, losing his ENTIRE corn crop, starving America in the process. Why, without high fructose corn syrup, this nation will descend into violent revolt!

To be clear, you’ve been dispatched; but the day is young. Ben is gonna empty his ashtray on your head.

China did not disappoint.

S&P futures are +3, eagerly awaiting the delivery of cocaine. If I was a betting man, which I most certainly am not, I’d throw some money on Europe reversing to the upside, gorilla raping any and all shorts within a 100 km radius.

As for me, I am content at +21%, 40% cash, long the things that I am long.

I hate when people write or say “all eyes on ‘XXX'”. Therefore, I just wrote it.

I am 40% cash, heavily long ag through LNN and MOS, with side dishes of CPST, EXK, RBCN and DMND. I’d like to say “the dick guillotines are rolling out into the city square, preparing for usage.” However, no one even knows where Bernanke keeps those things anymore. Besides, it’s summertime and Europe is as stupid as ever.

To put it bluntly, the fate of western markets lies in the east now, with tonight’s GDP numbers coming out of China.

Until then,

Ciao

Look at the intra-day reversal in silver?

Remember when I told you “the best time to own silver is at the peak of crisis into reflationary rebound”?

Well, the market is recovering from an early swoon and silver is leading the way up. If I had to put a shotgun to my face and pick a stock (I don’t know why I would do such a thing), I’d say “get long EXK”. I am not happy with TLT climbing to new highs, however. But at a minimum, it is somewhat encouraging to see silver reverse to the upside.

The day is young and I am not diving back into the market yet. My position in RBCN is getting “KRO-barred”; but it’s a very thinly traded stock that can reverse to the upside with a 20,000 share buy. It’s important to watch “early recovery” stocks, like MTW and TEX for a “feel.” So far, I am leaning towards the idea of a late day reversal and Friday surge, based off of manipulated Chinese GDP numbers, scheduled to be reported tonight.

UPDATE: I bought more EXK

How terrible is this tape? It’s mugs filled with black smoke and chards of metal, all over again.

Aside from VHC, we are in “full retard” to the downside mode. I am keeping my 45% cash position until the blood is freely flowing in the streets. Make no mistake, I am not immune from this catastrophe, as I too am bleeding out in a number of stocks. But let’s be honest, shall we?, I’ve out-foxed you, yet again; and now find myself in a superior position into the teeth of this grinder.

If you want to know why we are melting down here, you are asking the wrong questions.

This is summer malaise and US growth is stalling. Clearly, there are many problems in the world, scaring fuckers into odd lots of TLT. But let’s be honest with one another, shall we?: stocks are trading down because Bernanke didn’t do another round of QE3.

We need that shit to breathe. The policy responses by the Treasury and Federal Reserve have made us into weazened printing press addicts. You know it’s pathetic and denigrating; but the press is so fucking cool, I never want it to go away.

This too shall pass. Be patient.