iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,309 Blog Posts

HOW ABOUT THAT NATURAL GAS SCAM?

NATURAL GAS PRICES ARE NOW DOWN 75% FROM THE HIGHS, off by nearly half over the past year. This just goes to show, there are never any shortages of anything in this magical world of ours. We were promised Europe would freeze and Germany would go back to wheeled oxen carts — but alas there are still cars on the road in Berlin and the heat is still working all over Europe.

It would behoove you to be fooled in such a manner again. Admittedly, I was into it and wanted to see what could happen during a very cold winter — mainly out of curiosity. I am not an evil person and do not wish to see Germans freeze. Nevertheless, I waited and waited and was mildly surprised to finally see the net results of all of the chicanery — which was the exact opposite of what they told us would happen.

Oh, it would be so cold. All of the little Hungarians and Parisians alike would huddle ’round flaming barrels of trash to keep warm, all the while people in Moscow would be toasty warm, drinking beet juice and fish eggs by the natural gas fireside.

NONE OF THAT SHIT HAPPENED.

So what’s next?

Maybe we’ll have another semiconductor shortage, JUST BEFORE A 50% DROP in the SMH? Or perhaps we’ll run out of toilet paper or how about some helium. That’s right — your kids cannot have balloons because we ran out.

What about a fucking egg shortage, depriving junior of panned cakes — also because of the flour shortages — thanks to the MUHHHHH supply chain!?

Before I forget, we also have a shortage of adderall — because why the fuck not with so many ADHD’s out there. Now with people off their meds, we might see some other shortages — perhaps in ammunition or maybe couches. That’s right — it’ll take 6 months to get that fucking couch — because it’s on backorder — mainly because no one wants to work at the factory anymore.

FUCK THIS SHIT.

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5 comments

  1. purdy

    The egg shortage is due to our hens identifying as roosters.

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  2. txchick57

    The scam now is we re overloaded with gas and nobpdy will ever need it again. Just in time for selling at the bottom at 2011 prices. Then watch summer fall and next winter

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  3. txchick57

    The scam now is we re overloaded with gas an nobpdy will ever need it again. Just in time for selling at the bottom at 2011 prices. Then watch summer fall and next winter

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    • iflyjetzzz

      I will buy some UNL later this year. Nat Gas storage is in the middle of its 5 yr average. While Nat Gas production has increased, there’s still some of that going overseas. Plus, we need to produce more electricity and a LOT of power plants use nat gas.

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  4. indie

    great text.

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