I wish I knew then what I know now — the eternal dilemma and consequence of ignorance, in my case without intention. Always inquisitive and circumspect, I just didn’t see things for what they were. As I grow older, things I viewed as complicated or mysterious as a younger man are very obvious to me — and this has nothing to do with lunar landings and paintings of outerspace.
Over the past month I’ve been binge reading biographies. Thus far, I’ve gotten thru (extra Carnegie) Vanderbilt by Anderson Cooper, Rockefeller, Phil Knight (cunt), Carnegie, Elon Musk, and now House of Morgan. I’ll likely read Mellon and then move back into novels — perhaps another Raymond Chandler, which I rather enjoy during the holidays.
Unlike a good Chandler or Hemingway book, these biographies offer next to zero good prose and are completely bereft of mystery. So why are they so popular? Obviously, we’re all obsessed with death and the purpose of life. My grandparents came and went without leaving a mark — spent the final 20 years of their lives stuck inside a 2br apartment in Brooklyn, living off social security and drifting away via a mostly listless existence highlighted only by their memories of greater days.
We are told when young that we could do anything — become President, Supreme Court Justice, Baseball player — all lies, but benevolent lies told to offer hope. Without aspiration, what’s the point? I suppose with older age we care less because we know more. This knowledge could be a black-pill — but it doesn’t have to be.
As Americans hate each other more and more every day, with issues stemming from immigration to race relations to fucking vaccine status, I can’t help but to think how the absence of God/religion has caused people to attach to these otherwise moronic fanatical positions. I’ve been agnostic for decades so I am the last person to profess religion, but holy shit what has happened to people — beholden to government and now corporations as if those entities ever gave a fuck about the ordinary gentry. None of the divisiveness makes me mad, just disappointed. As is the case with my youngest son who wantonly offers ad hoc statements on the evils of white people, I can only be introspect and feel it is my fault for not instilling a greater pride or fervor in him. This is the result of a culture that is largely American infecting the minds of its youth with poison — a tactic used to demoralize and break people in order to rule them. Growing up in the 80s was a utopia in comparison to today — but I do not feel lucky, only sad because of my children who have to contend with a hatred so toxic it makes them question the very definition of gender.
Most of my blogs these days are redundant missives about my trading, rarely dealing with important topics because what’s the fucking point? I don’t hate democrats or republicans or even people who color their hair purple and blue. I cast no aspersions on people who prejudge others — because that’s part of the human instinct. I am only against cruelty and hurting others out of spite.
When I started this site 14 years ago November 12th, I had grandiose visions of creating a large finance site. We even had hundreds of bloggers in our ranks at the peak. With partners and competing egos, it mostly fell to shit and for the better part of the past 6 years I’ve been a one man band, with the occasional blog from long term confidants RC and Raul. I’ve created three iterations of a market data platform and have attempted to offer cogent ideas and display professional grade trading skills inside The PPT, Exodus and now Stocklabs since 2009. I left the industry as a manager of other people’s money in 2017, after 18 years, because I didn’t want to do it anymore. I often regret that decision, mostly due to the amount of money I left on the table considering the bull market run we’ve been on since then. But here I am still blogging like the wind with over 21,000 blogs in the books, a dedication unrivaled by anyone else in finance, as far as I know.
I am grateful for the people who’ve continued to come here on a daily basis, become members of my service, and permitted me to be a complete asshole for all these years mostly unchecked. The fact I am not banned on Twitter is a testament to the people who follow me not reporting me and I thank you for that. I am genuine when I say I like 90% of you and only hate 5%, with the other 5% mostly undecided.
If I am still blogging 14 years from now — you have my permission to kill me.If you enjoy the content at iBankCoin, please follow us on Twitter