The Social Graces at House Fly Continue to Impress!

The glamorous life at House Fly continues, dripping wonderfully into the summer sun like a moth into a hot flame.

After a full day of scrubbing and mopping, Le Fly exited his residence this morning in order to give license to a car filled of clowns to loiter inside of it with extreme circumspection. Upwards of 95% of these people are actually incapable or serious about buying homes — but rather find it amusing to tour homes and displace the occupants for the purposes of self-aggrandizement.

The issues with my large Mercedes truck continues, with malice.

The following have been diagnosed.

Timing chain
Busted gasket on centrifuge
Valve misfiring — spark plugs
Leaking coolant, oil
thumbnail CRACK on fucking windshield (NEW!)
brakes and rotors (NEW!)
Tires

Grande total to fix all of this shit is around $10k. No fucking problem.

My other car, after examination, has a FUCKING cracked windshield too. No idea how these things happen, but they do.

For the balance of this beautifully wonderful day, I shall remain caged inside of the manor, patiently awaiting another car filled with clowns to spill into my house and discuss its maladies. I’ve been informed that we mustn’t cavort outside today, in spite of the perfect weather, because we would, in fact, come back into the residence ‘smelling like horses.’ It’s important, I am told, to remain neutral smelling at all times — because the people inside of the clown cars prefer it that way.

To entertain myself, I might sit in front of the television and droll on for the next few hours, in true American spirit. I cannot, I am told, cook anything either, as it leaves a distinct non-neutral odor in the house, which clowns dislike. Ergo, I must nibble on grains and granola, maybe some nuts, in between my designated tasks.

As you bake your skin in the sun atop of flaming hot sand, Le Fly will be Ajaxing the floors and washing the walls — eating jelly sandwiches and drinking neutral flavored beverages in a neutral colored house, in a neutral fucking hell.

Good day.

You’re gonna get painted by going long oil during the summer months. This isn’t the time to go long, believe me.

Here’s the seasonality data from Exodus for the oil majors. Notice how no one gives a fuck about oil this time of year?

Here’s the news that is likely to get those oil lovers to add to their positions on Monday. It’s a trap, god damn it.

U.S. special representative to Iran, Brian Hook, told CNBC on Saturday that the U.S. is going to increase sanctions on Iran.

“We are going to increase our sanctions on Iran and continue our foreign policy,” Hook told CNBC’s Hadley Gamble in Abu Dhabi on Saturday.

Hook said that a lot of pressure is needed in order to address Iran’s “regional aggression” and the a new foreign policy devised by the U.S. aims to bring Iran back to the negotiating table.

“When the President (Trump) got out of the Iran deal, we put a new foreign policy that does a couple of things. It is going to deny the regime the revenue that it needs to run a violent and expansionist foreign policy. But it is also designed to bring them back to the negotiating table,” Hook said.

How can I be certain? Because I remember the answers. Anyone recall getting lured into oil stocks during the Iraq war? Yeah, it was a whole lotta rhetoric, which resulted in a giant nothing-burger.

Here is the seasonality stats for XOM one month before the 2003 Iraq invasion and three months following.

XOM seasonality, Iraq invasion, coalition of the willing

Feb: -0.4%
March (WAR MONTH): +2.04%
April: -0.48%
May: +2.25%
June: -1.70%

We might incinerate Iran over the weekend.

And now this just in from China.

Five more Chinese companies are banned from purchasing U.S.-made components.

The Commerce Department said these companies’s activities “pose a significant risk of being or becoming involved in activities contrary to the national security and foreign policy interests of the United States.”

Shares of U.S. semiconductors came under pressure after the announcement.

Semis are soft on this news. What to do? Figure it out you fucking brainlets.

I don’t have anything to do, other than watch over my slowly appreciating value stocks. They’re as interesting as a piece of cardboard, or maybe aluminum foil. But it’s SAFU and I need that in my life now, as I attempt to market my home and manage a website filled with degenerates.

I just spilt half a cup of coffee onto my white shirt. That was nice and refreshing.

This will be the final post of the day, as I am inclined to do anything but this. I just tossed a trade on for the weekend and I’ll sacrifice several goats tonight at the Druid Lodge to ensure the trade is a success. Other than that, I foresee a weekend filled with toil and grit and unhappiness at House Fly, grinding and dragging and slogging about sloppily into the summer. I’ve had better times before and I’m sure there will be better times ahead.

Until Monday lads, fuck off.

NOTE: I sold the following stocks to raise some cash.

DLTR +4.8%
ETR +3%
ED +2%
KMB +1.1%
DLR +4.3%

I don’t feel like trading today, so leave me alone. Over the weekend, I’m sure to have several showings for the house and there will be people dragging mud into the house and touching shit, peeping around with curious beady eyes. Had I known selling this home would be so much of a fucking hassle, I would not have done so.

Stocks are screaming higher and I do not have a reason for it, other than the indelible notion that things in motion tend to stay in motion. This is physics 101 you morons.

I’m fully invested! I have a large portfolio of old man stocks — Tootsie Rolls and shit like that. I’m essentially impervious to market drawdowns. Nothing can stop me.

I’ve been playing the IPO market recently and have been pleased by the results. It’s more or less a black box theory, where value can be extracted from something because it’s an esoteric mystery.

“What’s it worth?”

“Not fucking idea, mate. It just came public.”

“Well then how about we buy some to see what happens?”

“Sure, sounds like a formidable plan.”

This will work until it stops working and then the trade will sour and do the opposite of what it once did. Maybe the hot money will move into value next — once people realize that low rates is good for them.

Speaking of rate — they’re heading higher today, by a full 7 bps to 2.07%.

Am I worried?

Nope, since I don’t care, I cannot be worried.

I doubt I’ll trade today, but you never can tell. I have a meeting in about 30mins and then after that — I’ll probably get around to scrubbing the floors with Ajax again, washing the toilets bowls, and getting ready to vacate the residence for a sojourn into the pit of New Jersey.

Stock market 101.

Deflation is bad for stocks, inflation good.

Because the Fed is opting to inflate while markets and the economy are doing well, the perception is for rapid inflation, as seen in the TIPs, gold, dollar, and stock values.

As such, you cannot, even for a day, trade against this perception and think you could win. Stocks will and have remain irrational for longer than you can remain solvent.

Into the bell, I bought an IPO from today, which caters to this way of thinking, and I also bought a few Chinese burritos, a value play, and I booked a profit in UPWK.

Here are some of my recent trades — nothing is left out.

DRIP +28%
ROKU +2.5%
TVIX +5.7%
TZA +2%
FAZ +6%
TQQQ +4.5%
NUGT +21%
ROKU +6.4%
(DUST -2.9%)
AYX +5.4%
ZM +8.5%
PINS +9.5%
(PAGS -0.5%)
(SFIX -3.5%)
FAS +0.3%
(BE -3.1%)
LK +8.1%
CRWD +7.2%
SOLY +7.9%
NUGT +8.3%
SAIL +5.9%
CHWY -5.4%
ZS +2.4%
UPWK +2.6%

Trades are only posted in Exodus now, so sorry.

What the fuck is going on here? The NY Fed, the bastion of solidity in finance, felt it necessary to use their platform for LGBTQ awareness. Pray tell me, what the fuck for?

Here is the bizarre series of Tweets sent out by the NY Fed today. So tolerant.

To celebrate #PrideMonth, we have a special moment of our own to share… The first time a Pride flag has ever flown from our @NewYorkFed offices. ???? #MomentsOfPride #Pride #WorldPride #Stonewall50 pic.twitter.com/emtAlveBw8

— New York Fed (@NewYorkFed) June 3, 2019

The basis of the LGBTQ+ community is so fundamentally basic to human nature: equality, self-love, and acceptance. I find it no coincidence that synonyms of the word ‘gay’ are cheerful, jolly, and vivacious. It’s a human right to live an enjoyable life. #MomentsOfPride #PrideMonth pic.twitter.com/c7YNpO2IFb

— New York Fed (@NewYorkFed) June 4, 2019

My advice to LGBTQ+ in the workforce? Take time to know yourself, and who you want to be — connect to this vision and be able to bring that to the table, both in your professional and personal life. When you like you, it’s much easier for other people to like you.#MomentsOfPride pic.twitter.com/PRzuUi3SiH

— New York Fed (@NewYorkFed) June 4, 2019

My favorite part of the legacy of Stonewall is the response of the gay community to being unfairly persecuted. They came together and sang songs. Although riots erupted after, this event triggered a turning point to encourage acceptance of individual differences.#MomentsOfPride pic.twitter.com/2ehSRstHed

— New York Fed (@NewYorkFed) June 4, 2019

Hi, I’m Samuel. I grew up in Baltimore City, Maryland, and I’m a huge Star Wars fan. I love the movies, and the novels and cartoons as well. Star Wars NOT Star Trek (they are in fact different!). I’m a big fan of bebop jazz, and enjoy going to jazz venues in NYC. #Pride pic.twitter.com/h6Evu44Ryg

— New York Fed (@NewYorkFed) June 6, 2019

I love traveling, and I’ve been to over 30 countries in Africa, the Americas, Asia & Europe. I’ve never met a country I didn’t like. At home and abroad, I try to support as many LGBTQ+ owned businesses and attend events that recognize the LGBTQ+ community. #Pride #MomentsOfPride pic.twitter.com/L1rAPGE81l

— New York Fed (@NewYorkFed) June 6, 2019

My advice to LGBTQ+ in the workforce? Always know the value of your contributions, and your ability to influence outcomes. You bring a fresh and interesting perspective that your non-LGBTQ+ peers may not always see. #MomentsOfPride #Pride #PrideMonth #Stonewall50 pic.twitter.com/t0IGkLNqEc

— New York Fed (@NewYorkFed) June 6, 2019

Stonewall's legacy is important because it makes clear the challenges and obstacles that LGBTQ+ members experienced. At work, in their community, and among family members. It must have been extremely difficult. My road hasn’t been easy, but I’m happy I can be me. #Stonewall50 pic.twitter.com/htjNCgcOzk

— New York Fed (@NewYorkFed) June 6, 2019

Hi, I’m David. I grew up on the beaches of Southwest Florida. I’m passionate about travel, photography and scuba diving. Some recent highlights are Japan, New Zealand & Cuba. Next year, my husband and I are booked to return to the Maldives for our 5th anniversary. #MomentsOfPride pic.twitter.com/2bTfKx6PAH

— New York Fed (@NewYorkFed) June 11, 2019

My husband & I bring our whole selves to everything we do. Living as out gay men, in a bi-racial marriage within a multi-faith diverse family, we are cognizant that we celebrate ourselves and those that came before us simply by being ourselves. #MomentsOfPride #Pride #Stonewall50 pic.twitter.com/DyiL26HUu2

— New York Fed (@NewYorkFed) June 11, 2019

My advice to LGBTQ+ in the workforce? When identifying potential employers, ask questions to ensure you’ve found an employer that unquestionably supports you bringing your whole self to work. Get involved with employee resource networks & seek LGBTQ+ mentors. #Stonewall50 #Pride pic.twitter.com/M8LKg8y7Vr

— New York Fed (@NewYorkFed) June 11, 2019

As a young lawyer at a global investment firm, I was able to be out and join a LGBTQIA+ resource group. Five years ago, I married the love of my life. We are beneficiaries of the civil rights movement, and we’re PROUD to be ambassadors of the Stonewall legacy. #Stonewall50 #Pride pic.twitter.com/jShLL0v6T9

— New York Fed (@NewYorkFed) June 11, 2019

#Stonewall was the beginning of ???????? ?? and ???????? ?? for LGBTQ+ rights. Our community is well known for being good at mobilizing in support of each other during crisis. This all stems from Stonewall’s legacy. #MomentsOfPride #Stonewall50 #Pride pic.twitter.com/jE7RFoGnHZ

— New York Fed (@NewYorkFed) June 18, 2019

Hi, I’m Gil. I grew up in the DC Metro area. I have a degree in Sociology, and find people and cultures fascinating. I’m an avid cross fitter, and enjoy renovating my 100 yr old home. I also TNVR (trap, neuter, vaccinate, and return) feral cats in my neighborhood. #MomentsofPride pic.twitter.com/xj5zFJTM0h

— New York Fed (@NewYorkFed) June 20, 2019

I’m such a bad lesbian. I haven’t been to a march in years. I went to a Pride parade a few years ago, but I got the date wrong. I traveled from NJ to NYC, and couldn’t figure out where everyone was, until, of course, I realized my mistake. #Pride #PrideMonth pic.twitter.com/sqbmJLK4OZ

— New York Fed (@NewYorkFed) June 20, 2019

We get it NY Fed — you’re all really gay and proud and you don’t have the balls to stand up to Trump and will soon be cutting interest rates with unemployment at 3.6% and markets at record highs.

Take out your freemason aprons and take it all in — the Grandeur of the American empire and all of its trimmings.

This just in now from Trump, the President of the United States.

Agenda: WAR

BREAKING: Dow, S&P 500 drop to session lows as Trump comments on Iran, saying "you'll soon find out" if U.S. will strike Iran and says they made a very bad mistake. https://t.co/brmXjhJ1ZT pic.twitter.com/kxa7cwcfN0

— CNBC Now (@CNBCnow) June 20, 2019

Iran made a very big mistake!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) June 20, 2019

INDEUD.

Also, in case you were thinking about selling short.

President Trump says meeting with Chinese President Xi has been set up

— TheStreet (@TheStreet) June 20, 2019

BUY VALUE, believe me.

I know it’s all so annoying how something overtly manipulated or even staged can exist and not be checked. But why bother getting frustrated over things you cannot control?

Since Election Day 2016, Stocks up almost 50%, Stocks gained 9.2 Trillion Dollars in value, and more than 5,000,000 new jobs added to the Economy. @LouDobbs If our opponent had won, there would have been a market crash, plain and simple! @TuckerCarlson @seanhannity @IngrahamAngle

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) June 20, 2019

Markets have flexed to new record highs this morning, with oil and gold blowing full steam ahead — shorts getting twisted and mangled and dumped into sewer pipes.

What was that dip all about again? Oh yeah, China trade war. NEVER HAPPENED.

See pal, that’s what the market is and you’re nothing. Good Father? Fuck you — go home and play with your kids.

Incidentally, some of you are thinking about shorting stocks now. Why bother? I mean, really — why fucking bother?

The dollar is crashing lower again. Oil is up 5%. You simply cannot short the tape.

I sold ZS for +2.4%, another one of my overnight gambits.

As you were.

What more can I say, other than get your fucking rally hats out.

Here is the full rundown this very busy Wednesday evening.

The Islamic Republic News Agency said Thursday the drone was hit when it entered Iranian airspace near the Kouhmobarak district in southern Iran’s Hormozgan province.

The U.S. military declined to immediately comment.

Nasdaq futures are +65.

WTI +1.3%, and the 10 yr treasury yield is plunging, now under 2%.

And here’s the main story. The dollar is getting the business vs the euro, down by 0.4% and today’s retarded Fed meeting is finally resonating with people — getting them to believe inflation might be a very real concern.

GOLD HAS BROKEN A 7 YEAR CONSOLIDATION AND IS NOW +2.6% AT $1,383. Wow.

Yes, I’m presently long AU and NGD. “The Fly” wins again.

Good news everyone — The Federal Reserve removed the word “patient” from their statement — implying they might cut interest rates with markets at record fucking highs. This makes all the sense in the world and I hope President Trump is pleased with Jerome Powell now. We really need the market to run higher by another 10,000 points, else I don’t know we’ll all do with ourselves.

This is the world we’re in now, parsing through the statements of assholes for the express purposes of extreme profit. We will take these gains and buy jet planes and cocaine, and hookers, and gold watches — merrily swimming in a sea of nothing towards the grave — bobbing and weaving the whole time with high powered attorneys and accountants to increase our worth and moat — hoping to die before the IRS gets a chance to figure it all out.

What a life!

The Federal Open Market Committee voted 9-1 to keep the benchmark rate in a target range of 2.25% to 2.5%.
The action sets up a possible confrontation between Fed Chairman Jerome Powell and President Donald Trump, who has been pressuring the Fed to cut rates.

The Fed dropped the word “patient” to describe its approach to policy.

The central bank also left the door open somewhat to future cuts.

Eight members favor one cut this year while the same number voted in favor of the status quo and one still wants a rate hike.

This is what you wanted — isn’t it? Gold is pressing the fuck higher and bond yields sinking again. I can feel the anxiety in the pit of my stomach — short sellers sweating it out in a white knuckled panic, wondering the meaning of life. I have a clue for you. We’re in a period of effervescent progress and nothing can stop it. You can try — but you’ll fail. We have a warrior class of people in charge of America now and they’re only interested in growth and higher stocks. The second the market trends sideways — BAM! they do something to get the electricity generated again.

I got boned on my pick from yesterday and sold CHWY for a 5% overnight loss. I will try my hand at this shit again.

I’m quite pleased with the progress in the olde man sector, however. I own a fuckload of value and that’s the place to be with the incredible shrinking yield curve in effect.

Signing off now. Fuck off.