Never Sell Short a Dull Tape

The President may be heading to jail and China into the dumpster, but the market doesn’t want to trade lower. As such, one with a keen eye for preservation of capital should steer clear of selling short. This is a tape for gentlemen with cash only. If you’re the type of person to get nervous or unable to trade in rapid succession — you would be wise to avoid this tape altogether.

If you see rates moving higher, avoid gold — believe me. Also, and this is just be speaking now — fuck oil. If you want to make money trading, reduce the risk and just buy some tech.

As for me, fucking exhausted and just woke up from a nap. I have 45% cash in my trading and will buy something shortly.

Morning lads.

As you well know, I have my car back from the shop driving wonderfully. It feels like a brand new car. So, as nature would have it, now my dog is broken.

Over the past few days, after a brief noshing of some BBQ meat, my fucking dog has been shitting the stairs, late at night — a morning treat if you will — for yours truly. It’s liquid shit and always on the 2nd step of each landing, perhaps some fibonacci level she found to be of great interest. Last night I walked her outside for more than an hour, here and there — I walked her everywhere. Nothing.

At 4am, she entered my room, pacing back and forth, so, begrudgingly, at the vampire time of night — I took her for a walk around the neighborhood and she went — obviously an upset stomach. In my head, I hated her and hoped a larger mammal would appear and eat her — but how mad could I get at a sick animal. What am I if not a generous, empathetic, kind individual.

So then I tucked her onto the end of daughter’s bed and said “Au Revoir Shoshanna!” and attempted sleep, only to be rapidly awoken by my fire alarm system chirping without cause.

I got to sleep an hour and woke up for the kids, only to be entreated to a 2nd step filled with shit again, obviously a great emergency the whole hour my dog had alone, which I just rapaciously cleaned up and addressed.

F.M.L.

Let’s be frank. There is zero chance of Trump landing a trade deal with China with his Presidency on the ropes. And maybe that’s the 3D chess Pelosi is playing — fucking America’s economy — leaving no survivors.  With Trump big titted bull market getting grabbed by the pussy, he’s a fucking goner.

The catamites at BBG are picking up on this narrative this evening.

You’re gonna want to throw an audible out there and sell short stocks and soon. With the China trade deal dead, and whistleblowers coming out from the fucking woodworks, markets are about to get REAL interesting and volatile. Unlike Nixon, Trump is old and very rich and doesn’t like to be told what to do. I’m pretty sure he’d burn the entire country down in order to prevent his presidency being ended abruptly by people out to get him.

Futures are down 35 Nasdaqs, but that should accelerate to the downside this week and also gold should catch a sharp bid.

This is the type of informercial you like to watch at 3am. I went to walk my dogs this morning and they shot out the house like madmen, lunging on their extended leashes at some poor women and her fluffy dog. My coyote was fucking howling at them, drooling and attempting to eat both the owner and her stuffed animal. It was a woefully embarrassing situation for Le Fly, who is this go around attempting to be kind towards his neighbors, Southern Gent style. Alas, my fucking dogs have brought with them a malevolent evil that was inherent and always present in NJ.

I got my Benz out from the dealership, cost me $10k for a brake job and the old CAM SHAFT fix. No big deal.

On the issue of Exodus 2.0, we have data now going back decades, streaming in real time, and our algorithms auto-fixed to charts. Major win.

The Exodus Intelligence will be applied to portfolio functionality and every stock and ETF in the system, in order to present historical context. In other words, we will show you what your stock had done from 1 to 10 trading days while trading at the real time algorithmic rank Exodus applies. If AAPL is given a technical score of 3.55 now, we will be able to show you in real time what Apple had done in its history from a 1-10 day time frame. This is important, because, as I’ve shown you in numerous posts, history rhymes and human behavior is repeatable and as such predictable.

For example.

I just sold out from JNUG for a 3.9% gain. This is what I do, every single day — feeding the masses fish because they’re hungry, clamoring for sustenance.

Here are my last 10 trades.

TVIX +2.2%,
TVIX +6.6%
TVIX +4.7%
TVIX +8.22%
TZA +4.7%
(YANG -5.1%)
TQQQ +1.85%
(ROKU -3.5%)
MU +2.3%
JNUG +3.9%

Now post yours.

See pal, that’s who I am and you’re nothing.

Moving on, I bought a bunch of stocks into the bell, 45% cash, winning all the fucking time.

HAGW.

We were oversold, as indicated by Exodus on Wednesday and now we’re working off that. Typically the oversold condition lasts about 10 days, so one should expect to make even more coin next week.

I ran into a buzzsaw with a ROKU trade gone awry yesterday and booked a 3.5% loss today. I do not have patience for down stocks on big up days. I also took profits on MU, bought yesterday, for a gain of 2.3%.

Honestly, I do not have an appetite for a lot of risk here. I feel the market can run and it should — but there is so much fucking news out there that could go wrong, I’d rather err on the side of caution. Bear in mind, I am fully long in my Quant, hedged by a 15% weighting in GLD — constituting 75% of my liquid assets. The other 25% is what I trade with and that’s what I have mostly in cash. I might buy a few stocks into the bell, but I doubt I’ll have less than 50% cash after it’s all said and done.

Big weekend planned at House Fly. My son is flying in from school and I got my fucking car back from the dealership, $10k in total. Fucking shit. I’m having a fine day, albeit a little lethargic. Lots of scrubbing to partake in later on today. Lots of toil and industry.

If I don’t update this blog later, have a nice weekend and be sure to avoid fucking yourselves into the close.

Good morning Bear Shitter. I am here to tell you, you will lose a great deal of money today. Apparently, America added another 136,000 jobs today, sinking unemployment to 3.5%. While this might sound fantastic to you, the Third Estate, it’s rather milquetoast. As such, futures are soaring, +35 Nasdicks.

Unemployment hit a fresh 50-year low in September even though nonfarm payrolls rose by just 136,000 as the economy nears full employment, the Labor Department reported Friday.

The jobless rate dropped 0.2 percentage points to 3.5%, matching a level it last saw in December 1969. A more encompassing measure that includes discouraged workers and the underemployed also fell, declining 0.3 percent points to 6.9%, matching its lowest in nearly 19 years and just off the all-time low of 6.8%.

Also, the jobless rate for Hispanics also hit a new record low while the level for African-Americans maintained its lowest ever.

At the same time, the economy saw another sluggish month of growth. The nonfarm payrolls count missed the 145,000 estimate from economists surveyed by Dow Jones; the expectation on the jobless rate was to hold steady at 3.7%.

Is it possible markets will fade this news and tank, making this article totally nonsensical rubbish? Absolutely, it happens all the time. But I like my fucking chances here, mate. I like the odds of me boxing in your face until my knuckles bleed.

Happy Friday!

It was a hard choice. I mulled over the decision for at least 5 minutes. But after careful deliberation, I bought 4 stocks. I think we gap up tomorrow, but who knows? Maybe we get a fucked Tweet from POTUS and maybe some other fucked shit is leaked. Who knows?

One thing that is indelibly clear, and this goes without saying. Exodus WINS AGAIN. The fucker closed oversold yesterday. Are you surprised?

I feed fuckers fish daily. That’s what I do. I will never want to willingly teach you anything, only shove well cooked quality fish into your gullets.

Advertisers love me. Titles like that is what they pay me for. That being said, it was a tongue in cheek joke — because I’m really a Viking Warrior King and Master Fucking Ace Trader (M.F.A.T.). But due to the present condition of stocks, juxtaposed against news flow and seasonality, I am opting for 70% cash or close to it.

This is not the season to be brave.

Granted, get out there kids and buy stocks, but not with all of your money. Hell, if you did that, your head might end up in the basket. Be gentle and take it easy — quit acting like a rapist.

I kicked out TQQQ. I had bought it yesterday and gained 1.85% on the trade. This was the fish I fed my members of Exodus, a delicious fish served over a bed of potatoes with a lemon and butter beurre blanc. You do not need to know how to cook at House Fly, only eat.

I have several other longs, maybe some gold, maybe some bonds. I do a lot of shit. But for right now, I need to head out and I do not want any intra-day risk, so I will likely reserve my next trade for the end of day.

Lots of rhetoric being flung around by rookies. The economy sucks and Trump is a goner and doom is cool.

WRONG.

You know what’s cool? Making 17% over the summer is cool.

This is what you need to remember, when going thru market squalls like this.

Downside pin-action is temporary. Given enough time, stocks will rebound and do fine. In this particular market, we have the Fed already cutting rates, attempting to get AHEAD of the curve. This is unique and not bearish for stocks.

What to do next?

When shit gets hard, I like to eat a sandwich, except for when shit is fucked up at House Fly. For example, this morning I was awoken to liquid dog shit all over my steps. That was nice. I had to steam clean them first thing in the morning at 6:30am. After that I was so disgusted, I went back to sleep. Do you know why I did that?

BECAUSE I CAN. That’s why children. Some people enjoy to punch clocks and work long hours for little to no pay. I prefer to get paid a fuckload of money while napping.

Back to the serious matter of stocks.

Buy them.