In a hilarious comedy skit, Cramer tried to sound impartial to the political process this evening, by practically begging Janet Yellen to initiate QE4, or send strong signals that the Fed will not hike rates, so that Trump or Sanders don’t get elected.
He feels either candidates will be extremely harmful to Wall Street.
He delves into the Fed’s policy and how awful a job Yellen is doing, quizzing their ridiculous stance against inflation when in fact it doesn’t exist.
In short, elect Hillary Clinton for the sake of Wall Street (rolls eyes so hard, they fell out of my head).
Wall Street is leaning heavy to the GOP this election season, mainly due to Dodd-Frank, which took away Goldman Sach’s ability to bank huge coin. Thus far, many of the donations went to the Bush dynasty, like morons. If Trump wins, all of their money will be flushed down the republican toilet, as The Donald is hugely belligerent towards the GOP, China and Wall Street in general.
On the DNC side, Morgan Stanley are huge Hillary fans.
The tribal people of Iowa are about to become relevant again, an American tradition that stubbornly repeats itself every 4 years. The favorites are Trump and Hillary Clinton.
All of the candidates are complete bullshit, corrupt and disgusting people trying to hoodwink a retarded public into entrusting them with the nuclear football.
I really can’t get fired up over this game of smoke and mirrors. To me, politics is just another ploy to pit ordinary Americans against one another–getting us fired up to hate one another over meaningless topics that do not affect our lives in anyway, whatsoever. Even if these topics did affect us, it’s not like any of these candidates could effect change through an egregiously corrupted and controlled congress.
I’ll be reporting the results throughout the night and perhaps posting some video clips of the assholes who are trying to win.
It was a big day for paradigm shifts. Facebook overtook Berkshire Hathaway and Exxon for the #4 spot; and after crushing earnings this evening, GOOGL is now more valuable than Tim “I’m Still Gay” Cook’s Apple.
NOTE: S. Jobs is rolling over in his grave.
Shares of GOOGL are ripping higher, up more than $40 to $815.
For the first time ever, Alphabet revealed its moonshot bets and operating income for their investment portfolio. They have become a modern day Berkshire Hathaway, essentially. But instead of investing in 20th century concepts, like soda pop and industrial companies, they’re focused on high tech.
The results, reported for the first time under a new structure that separates Google’s main search and advertising operations from riskier investments, show that fourth-quarter revenue, excluding sales passed on to partners, rose 19 percent to $17.3 billion. That exceeded analysts’ average projection for $16.9 billion, according to data compiled by Bloomberg. Profit, before certain items, was $8.67 a share, beating the prediction for $8.08.
Google, which has been investing in artificial intelligence, self-driving cars and health technology, changed its name and structure last year to give investors a clearer view into the performance of its Web business and the money Alphabet Chief Executive Officer Larry Page is devoting to new projects. The health of Google’s main business and investor confidence in the company’s ability to innovate has helped to more than double the stock price in the past three years.
“It’s a very healthy bottom-line beat,” said Josh Olson, an analyst at Edward Jones & Co. “This new transparency is going to help. The core business looks very healthy. That’s going to build investors’ confidence about the other bets they’ve been making.”
The new structure is designed to accelerate Google’s forays into other businesses beyond ad sales, by giving the newer divisions more flexibility. The shift to Alphabet has also given more freedom to top executives who would otherwise want to run their own companies. Investors also learned how expensive the company’s futuristic ambitions are. Alphabet’s “Other Bets” category had an operating loss of $3.57 billion for the year, widening from $1.94 billion in 2014, while revenue from these units rose 37 percent to $448 million in 2015.
The new structure has also given more to autonomy to Google’s main business under CEO Sundar Pichai. He has devoted resources to buffing up Google’s ad products, introducing new formats while improving the delivery and accuracy of targeted marketing spots. A key challenge is to control spending on initiatives to boost traffic, which are aimed at making up for declining ad prices on mobile devices. Total clicks on ads were up 31 percent in the latest period, even as the average price for an ads on Google’s websites fell 16 percent.
Alphabet’s other bets span everything from robotics and Internet-beaming balloons to self-driving cars and health-care research. While they are mainly costs that are supported by Google’s search-ad operations, they have the potential for long-term growth, according to Ivan Feinseth, chief investment officer of Tigress Financial Partners LLC, who has a buy rating on the stock.
Allegedly, the market rallied today after Fed’s Fischer’s comments, sounding like a buffoon who first discovered fire and its heating elements. Oil remained in the doldrums and utilities led the way higher–hardly an inspiring trading session. With the Iowa caucuses looming this evening and the cancer of negative rates spreading around the world, ice cube marinator in Chief, Arthur Cashin, believes the Fed has–once again–painted themselves into a corner.
Cashin sums it up saying “tell me what the crude market is gonna do tomorrow and I’ll tell you where everything is going.”
Fed’s Fischer gave a hugely ridiculous speech today about the virtues of negative rates. He had the balls to praise Denmark for raising rates from -0.75% to -0.60%. Overall, he had nothing but good things to say about negative rates.
I talked about this yesterday: the negative rate environment is forming a bubble–one that is encouraged by more government borrowing. With over $5.5 trillion in government debt now trading with negative rates and the debt burden of sovereign governments on the rise, the sucker who will pay for all of this is the person reading this blog.
Because Visa and Mastercard are taking over the world, coupled with the stigma of cash, very soon–in your lifetime–you will pay your bank to house your money. As an investor in government bonds, you will pay your government to borrow your money–for the safety of it all.
No one thought a negative rate environment could last. Analysts said people would take their money out of banks and put it under their mattresses. Well, over in Europe, where this grande experiment was born, that is not happening.
Some people believe the Fed can eventually go negative, providing economic conditions don’t improve.
Stocks have done the unthinkable: they’ve decoupled from crude oil and reversed an egregious early morning drop. It’s wholly ridiculous, frankly. Stocks should be afraid of crude oil down 6% for the session. Instead of rallying, they should be pondering the ways a bankrupted U.S. oil industry will affect the overall economy.
Nevertheless, here we are with FB and Netflix leading the way towards prosperity.
Tomorrow I am selling out of my final purchase of SPY, done at $185.40.
God it pains me to offer nothing but tales of doom and death to equity buyers. But I haven’t seen anything worthwhile to get excited about yet.
I don’t give a shit what you FB fanboys have to say about Zuck and his wildly overvalued stock, dubbed FB. This is wrong, on a cosmic level.
With today’s move, FB passed Warren Buffett’s Berkshire Hathaway and the world’s largest oil conglomerate, Exxon Mobile, to become America’s 4th largest company at $324 billion.
At 17x sales, Facebook is trading at a 15x premium to Buffett and 8x to Apple.
They sell annoying ads…on the fucking Internet. Don’t get me wrong, I know there is extreme value in FB; but this feels wrong–like gawking at CSCO trade with a $500 billion market cap and justify it with platitudes like “they’re building the internet” (for you youngsters out there, that really happened).
I don’t know when it will happen; but rest assured, FB will get its comeuppance. Everyone does.
I love T Boone Pickens. I don’t know the man, but you can tell he’s less evil than other men. After all, what sort of an 87 yr old boss tweets this out to asshole rapper Drake?
An awesome man, that’s who.
At any rate, poor T Boone made his way onto the television today to call yet another bottom in crude oil. He’s been doing this a lot lately.
Pickens predicted on CNBC’s “Squawk Box” that oil prices will rise to at least $52 per barrel by the end of the year, though he reiterated his admission that he got last year’s call wrong when he thought prices would strongly rebound.
West Texas Intermediate crude, the U.S. benchmark, was under pressure again Monday — losing around 3 percent mid-morning and trading below $33 per barrel.
In a CNBC commentary back in October, Pickens conceded his prediction for $70 oil by the end of 2015 wasn’t going to happen. On the final trading day of last year, WTI settled at around $37 per barrel.
Then this happened to crude oil.
T Boone, you’re too old for this shit. Go smoke a pipe in your study and chase whipper snappers off your front lawn, like me. I do that shit now and I’m not even 40.
Stocks are plunging with oil. Welcome to hell, gentlemen.
Cramer talks shop with the great wigged one, Joe Kernen, who obviously stole the name of iBankCoin’s Peanut Gallery and affixed it to his new NJ based art gallery.
