GET IN THE URN

I couldn’t resist the temptation of the sweet crack, as Israel drops “smart bombs” all over Gaza city. The powder keg, also known as Obama’s peace prize accomplishment, is on the verge of titanic eruptions– scheduled to effectively and purposely thrust cavemen into ash bins for expeditious liquidation. It goes without saying, I am very long in the WNR.

As the market goes BOOM, so do the wallets of consumers, clamoring to spend even MOAR money on turkey, gravy and stuffing. Shortly thereafter, a very hideously fat America will head out to the shopping malls to spend inordinate amounts of coin on “luxury items.” It’s funny that COH and KORS are considered luxury, when in fact they are reviled amongst social circles in NYC and other meaningful cities of substance.

With all of my talk and chest thumping, I’m barely up today (+1%), thanks to the homosexual nature of VHC. I am sure CHUCK BENNETT will explain to me how $32 was “such a good sale” today, in his never-ending and annoying quest to crush my VHC spirit. Little does he know, “The Fly” has zero regard for money and other trifles that plague the lot of you. As you’ve been told, I have other things at the top of my agenda. For example, I am on the verge of releasing the very best investor tool since The PPT. My world famous artistic programmer extraordinaire, VINCENZO ILLUMINATI, who fancies himself to be the “The Chevalier” of code, is hard at work–putting on the finishing touches of what he describes as “the modern day equivalent of Garcon a la pipe” for investors. It is scheduled to detonate inside of your offices– like a TZAR BOMBA– by pagan X-mas.

I’ve also been preoccupied with Mrs. Fly, whose ruinous spending sprees can only be matched with my penchant for obtaining coin.

Lastly, I’ve been orchestrating a financial coup over my great list of enemies, all to be financed by the winship that you continue to witness here on this first tier site. We do not write on a third grade level, like the majority of your favorite financial blogs out there. As a matter of fact, I piss on them, while smoking a cigar filled with their ashes.

Top picks: WNR, VHC, SWHC, EXK and NXPI