iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,445 Blog Posts

Ending the Quarter with Style

While most of you end your quarters in complete disgrace, “The Fly” will enter Q2 a winner. Some of my enemies are running full speed right now, heading for brick walls—hidden behind large caches of dynamite. It is true, my life is not as fun as it used to be, like back in the ol’ “orange days” of ’06, when I’d drink excessive quantities of Monster Energy Soda and devoured oversized portions of greasy chicken wings. With age comes grace: and with grace comes outright indignation—stemming from the lack of panache exhibited by my lesser equals.

Doing what I do, day in and day out, is rather monotonous: talk to people, deny new clients, fire old ones, make a ton of money—repeat over and over again until I cry.

Life as I know it is changing on a daily basis. Some things are rising in value, while others plummet, with regards to the things I like to do of course. As you can tell, I like throwing flaming barrels of garbage, onto the internets, just to see the reaction from some of the stiffly starched characters out there. I will not name names, since it never has been my style; but most of you finance bloggers out there are as exciting as a ham bologna sandwich—not even the good stuff.

Into quarter end, I might as well hold my risk-free position, just in case the “cocaine crowd” decides to take profits.When investing in stocks, always remember to expect the most retarded events to strike, whenever you least expect. You will be going about your business, then BAM, clubbed over the head with the spastic retard stick—sending your bullshit Think and Sink account seaworthy.

In summary, I’ve been eating extraordinarily well, as of late. I’ve all but eliminated fatty foods from my diet and laugh at sugar, whenever it asks me to eat it. I’ve lost  a rather unwarranted 20 lbs. in recent months, allowing Dr. Neutraility to poke even greater fun at the oversized fat horde. Oh, and aside from that, I’m up about 12% for the quarter.

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32 comments

  1. Rand

    Sounds like wylie coyote rides again. Also looks like Obama ride out east as fast as wylie.

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  2. Rand

    I’m italian, and olive oil from the hime country is best, and expensive.

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  3. Le Fly

    I have been trying some olive oil from old carthage as of late. Pretty good

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  4. Le Fly

    Who is lame? I will massacre you!

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  5. BernieCornfeld

    Its good to stay up late- FIRST!

    I almost forgot—carry on with your “outright indignation”—that is all

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    • mrsbuttons

      eliminated all fatty foods and sugar? no wonder you’re so cranky…give us a break and go have a twinkie – please!

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  6. Mushroomz

    the $8 olive oil is just as good as the $24 bottle

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  7. TA

    Come back Fly, the robots are asking where you went.
    The game misses you as much as you miss the game.

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  8. wabisabi

    ‘With age comes grace: and with grace comes outright indignation—stemming from the lack of panache exhibited by my lesser equals.’ and, unfortunately, impotence

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  9. JakeGint

    “Spastic retard stick” is gold, btw.

    If you’ve lost 20 lbs, you must be looking like one of those poor bastids in the Maze, Long Kesh Prison, outside Belfast, back in the days of Protest.

    Bobby Sands et al.

    ________

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  10. wabisabi

    i will, however, agree that when it comes to olive oil, as with most things, you get what you pay for.

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  11. FEMA CAMP

    We appreciate your “cocaine peeps” pep talk, but we’re about to close until the Chinese bubble blows up. See you in a couple of years. Boy do we hate free money, makes us feel used.

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  12. JF2

    Lame.

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  13. tgarfield

    Are your enemies – longs – shorts – or just most people in general at this point??

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  14. Do Your Own Homework
    Do Your Own Homework

    Make your own cake.

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  15. Dubz

    That was a most enjoyable read, indeed.

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  16. Alvari40

    Fly,

    You win again! I have lost 16 pounds since mid-February. Out of 95% bread, dairy, red meat, processed sugar, etc. Eating much more raw – love the benefits of hemp seed. Farmers market loves me and juicing my way to health. Need to make a bit more trading tho to pay for new threads so that I can ditch my potatoe (sic) sacs. I can now make a killer Hummus. My son hates me.

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    • mrkcbill

      Alvari…Fly… have you received your Gold Stars from Michelle O?

      Seriously good job…..now I hear its 60 mins a day of exercise a day vs 30 mins a week ago….. sounds excercise inflation has arrived.

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      • TraderCaddy

        Congrats to Fly and Alvari40 for the weight loss.
        I am down 14 lbs from second week of Feb. just by cutting eating after dinner and reducing the meals amount by about 20-25%.
        However, I just gained a few by seeing that mrkcbill brought back his BBQ rib avatar.

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  17. Tampa Trader

    looking for an opinion–I know IBC doesn’t to a lot (or any) penny stocks but does anyone have a take on Miller Petroleum $Mill….I can’t figure out if it’s a truly undervalued stock or if it’s a scam by some good ole boys out of Tennessee? I saw it this AM as a top ten increase in value, have seen some articles where the CEO is pumping it….would love to hear anybody’s take–is their Alaskan purchase hype or legit? thanks in advance.

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  18. buylo

    I think its time for you to vacation in Roomania again.

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  19. YaBollox

    ‘Lesser equals’— that’s us.

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  20. henryisafool

    Hey Fly… I love your blog here but some of your traders on here are complete jokers… namely HENRYFOOL

    I JUST BLEW UP MY ACCOUNT ON HIS DAMN “POUND THE TABLE” PICKS

    WHAT A CLOWN

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    • Scavenger

      Free advice: Learn about ‘position size’ and ‘stop loss’.

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      • Po Pimp

        I’ll 100% agree with you on ‘position size’, but when trading stocks with the volatility of Henry’s picks a stop loss should only be mental. You put in a hard stop loss might as well mail a check to the MM and get it over with quicker.

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    • Po Pimp

      Win some, lose some.

      Nothing wrong with Henry at all. When you deal with live hand grenades on a regular basis you’re going to lose some fingers at times. I’ve lost some money on Henry trades, but I’ve made a lot more than was lost on others. He’s only said it a million times… “Don’t risk more than you can afford to lose.”

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