Let’s Ruffle Some Feathers

You have to cut out the cancer, as if that shit was on an accelerated path, eating away at your liquor laden liver. There’s negativity everywhere—especially here— on the interwebs, where everyone thinks it is their right to be an internet gazillionaire. These people walk around, naked, with beer cans in their sweaty palms, typing inane/retarded shit into their computer box, then subsequently spinning unnoticed, like an Italian burglar, trying to steal from aliens.

So you know, I’ve been grizzled since birth, accustomed to the art of doublespeak by people with crooked noses, who carry face masks and whiskey bottles in the drunks of their stolen cars.

As for the market, we’re in the midst of one of the Godliest runs of all time. I need the standards raised here, else I am going to start going bizerko on some of you fuckers. I don’t want to hear shit about your little toppy ideas about when or if the market will collapse. I want ideas, like RC and CA, on a daily basis, else you need to fuck off and go somewhere else.

Into the oil spike, I will ride my ERX position (#2 by size in my portfolio) into the 40’s and urinate gasoline on those who are short FTK.

To sum up this post, I will quote a great man: “I will viciously snatch your chain and ruin your bullshit career.”

SPECIAL UPDATE: Some necessary wisdom for some of you ingrates.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A1vMpkIRAjo&feature=related 616 450]

This is the easiest tape, since the days I was eating shrimp cocktails at my desk, while buying blocks of CMGI and ATHM.

Please, put aside your market bias. Put aside your hatred for the gold chained one. Put aside your love for retarded panic bloggers and get long.

Get long, as a ways to avoid the Sun chasing you around the universe, trying to fry your face off. Get long, as if to avoid accidentally breaking Angelo Mozilo’s tanning bed. Get long because the Gods of logic and reason, all found within The House of Fly, said so.

Top pick: TRID

BREAKING NEWS OF THE EXCLUSIVE SORT:

Pic of Angelo Mozilo, future prisoner of assrape prison, delivered to iBC:

I loved oil at $125. I hated oil at $35. Now, with oil at $68, I love it again.

I’m a sucker for momentum. What can I say?

One thing is for certain: the inflation trade is back, with full force. Oil, gold, copper, hell, pretty much everything but natty is sprinting higher. Oil is at a point where it makes economic sense for the exploration companies to take their stacked rigs and put them back to work. Look for the E&P sector to continue its trek higher. Additionally, look for parts and service companies, like FTK, WFT and OIS, to begin melting the faces off of those who bet against them.

With a snap, just like that, oil service firms will be banking egregious coin, as oil marches to its destiny: $100.

With my money, I am long vast quantities of FTK, ERX, with a little side dish flavor in SD and ARD.

For the first time in a long time, I bought a bank: FITB. I am looking for a squeeze up to $9. Some of my larger cap holdings, IR, GLW and DELL, look great. And, some of my core holdings, like ATHR, OVTI, are responding well to today’s bounce back.

Just know, today is much more than a mere “bounce back.” We have significant traction in a number of sectors. Frankly, if you are short stock, you are out of your fucking minds.

Into the bell, I may buy a little more ENTR or SIFY. Regrettably, I sold out of SFE, over the last few days. One of its majority holdings, CLRT, is breaking out. As a result, the NAV for SFE just went way the fuck up.

As for The PPT: they are making buckets of coin, in a variety of insane trades, like HEB, BEE and GMO.

I bought 50,000 FITB @ $7, 10,000 GLW @ $15.60, 20,000 ATML @ $3.95 and 5,000 ARD @ $36.20 and 10,000 FTK @ $2.40.

Disclaimer: If you buy the above stocks because of this post, you are nuts. And, you may lose money.

Stocks are really, really cool. I am buying stocks, based upon their coolness and will use the certificates to line the collar of my leather jacket. That’s how fucking cool they are.

Here’s what I see, so far:

Oil up+ dollar down+tech up+ banks up= Break the fuck out banana market.

Do not fight the tape. The market doesn’t care about your thoughts or emotions. So, quit getting all emotional about your trades. Be like Woodshedder. Be the robot.

With my money, I like GLW here, a lot. I shall buy some, take a few bites out of my sandwich, then buy some more.

We shall all be suckled by The Great Whore, as the market lavishes us with gifts from the Gods. My bowl of grapes is overflowing with gold and my diamond encrusted chalice is filled with sweet ambrosia.

Off to eat a mutton sandwhich.

Bullish for semis.

Taiwan Semiconductor Manufacturing Company (TSMC) and United Microelectronics Corporation (UMC) are expected to report better-than-expected performance for the third quarter as both are seeing clear order visibility through the quarter, according to industry sources. The two major contract chipmakers have reportedly landed increased orders from Broadcom and Qualcomm.

TSMC and UMC will likely see their utilization rates running at almost full capacity in the third quarter, the sources commented. Both foundries began seeing a recovery in utilization rates in the second quarter, with monthly revenues expected to grow sequentially throughout June.

In line with the foundry sector’s upcoming rebound, major wafer packaging and testing houses Advanced Semiconductor Engineering (ASE) and Siliconware Precision Industry (SPIL) will also enjoy improved revenue performance on extended order visibility throughout September or even beyond, the sources indicated.

My picks are SPIL, KLIC, AMKR, ASX, TER and CDNS

In other newz, The President is getting his chain-game on, Mr. T style. I am sure that chain carries an antenna that will transmit “fuck America” frequencies, enabling the Saudis to control Vice President O’Bama’s pigeon sized brain. Do not be surprised to see “The O” wearing that shit everywhere: around the White House, all casual and shit, during press conferences— and most assuredly during declaration of war speeches.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nx5fBo1EO2M&feature=related 616 450]

You fucking bears are pathetic. Is that the best you could do, -.72% on the fucking Dow? Are you fucking kidding me? All jokes aside, I don’t want to hear a Goddamn thing about your bearish picks on iBC. Take that shit to the yahoo message boards, where you belong.

BAM, next thing you know, me and my green shoots, recklessly, are throwing mustard seed gas grenades at your general direction.

Do yourself a favor: cover all of your shorts and donate the proceeds to charity. Go help out kids with cancer. If not, I am just going to take your coin and buy new cars with it.

Into the bell, I am down around 4%, with a chestful of pride and hate built up, ready to bowl on you stupid bastards from here to Timbuktu.

Aside from that, I am in a rather pleasant mood today.

Be well.

Top pick: GLW

What a fucking snoozer. Judging by today’s action, it looks as if Senor Tropicana will have to write in a loss. Don’t be concerned. “The Fly” shall return, with a full heart, in order to throw sand in the faces of all of you fucktards and internet cellar dwellers.

I am sure you can find great advice from one of the TIM’s, or better yet the other assholes who predict the death of your grandparents, by way of famine.

I guaranfuckingtee, the market is not done going up yet. Many of you losers are getting into this market short, on a 90 degree angle, will get spun around and raped by a pack of rogue robots.

I have lots of new ideas, which will be used to form my new investment approach. However, thus far, I find little motivation to share anything with the likes of you. You’re all a bunch of ashtray cleaning stock butlers, unable and unwilling to take what’s rightfully yours.

Upon the eyes of others, may you all fall down idle sinkholes and subsequently get swallowed whole by mythical fire breathing dragons. In the meantime, I’ll be on The PPT, where reason and honor is still readily abundant.