Fly Buy: HBAN

I bought 25,000 Huntington Bancshares Incorporated [[HBAN]] @ $4.62.

Disclaimer: If you buy HBAN because of this post, your only son will become an aspiring actor. And, you may lose money.

Let’s make it interesting this morning, shall we? Make believe you had a fucking brain attached to your skull and had $1 million dollars to invest in the market, where would you put it?

Would you buy a bunch of [[UNG]] and pray for hurricanes, like the horse face that you are? Or, would you buy up all of the banks, after 200% runs? Furthermore, what type of allocation discipline will you exhibit? What will be the maximum % of assets you will put in any one name, 5%, 10%, 20%?

I know a lot of you are just winging it, not paying attention to the minor details that make investing an art, not a science. You need to have barriers and limitations, or else you will get the Jewish wedding in the middle of Tehran treatment, once the market turns against you. I see people blowing themselves up all the time. Some successful business owners make the grave error of believing they can succeed in the market, just like they do in their respective businesses. Big mistake.

You have to put in the work, through studying and reading research/publications, to be a space alien magician. Most of you—not all—should be putting your hard earned money into mutual funds, or have some hedge fund manager run it for you. Most jackasses think learning how to read a few charts will lead to unparalleled triumph over the indices. Wrong. You have to put in the work, you lazy, fat fuckers. Put the cupcakes down and start taking this shit seriously, else find yourself working like a mule, trying to pay for your kids’ college tuition, for the next 20 years.

As for today’s tape:

German GDP numbers were better than expected; hence, we have an excuse to rally. Right now, the market is taking the path of least resistance, via slaughtering the bears and making them look like a bunch of “Simple Jacks.” I see breakouts all over, but will not chase. I have made an executive decision to chill out, like a penguin eating pancakes, until the market corrects 5-10%. Chill out meaning: I will hold no less than a 30% cash position.

If forced to choose one stock, right now, I’d say go long Huntington Bancshares Incorporated [[HBAN]] in size here.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MKU_98Bq6DM 616 500]

When I was younger, I used to work like a dog, forgoing the luxuries of lunch and afternoon walks. I was very frazzled back then, desperate to be successful, since I had no choice. Living with hardship does a lot for a person’s character. However, I’d never want to be subjected to the lowly living quarters of a basement apartment, located in the heart of Brooklyn, ever gain.

Many of you are spoiled rotten, effectively leaving you impotent to deal with adversity. Take stuff away from yourself; live like a hobo. If your Mommy and your Daddy have a trust fund set up for your comfort, don’t touch it. If you are already successful, but lack the motivation to work: enjoy life asshole. Everyone seems to be obsessed with making a gagillion dollars, but forget to live. When you are dead, buried under 6 feet of filthy dirt, your money will be spent by spoiled kids or corrupt charities.

If you are happy living modest, live modest. If you are the type that needs diamonds on your chalice, shoot for the stars fuckface. Shoot for the stars.

The point here: there comes a point when enough is enough, in life and the market. Don’t be a greedy fucker. Go eat a sandwich and chill the fuck out.

As for me, I put some cash to work, in reaction to today’s market rally. I am positively certain that today’s rally will sustain the lionshare of its gains. However, I am not so sure about tomorrow. Unless we get a 5-10% correction, “The Fly” will be trading light, with lots of cash on the sidelines.

I bought 5,000 General Cable Corporation [[BGC]] @ $35.80, 30,000 Sterling Financial Corporation [[STSA]] in the high $3.30’s, 30,000 ANADIGICS, Inc. [[ANAD]] in the low $3.90’s and 7,000 Starent Networks Corp. [[STAR]] in the high 22.90’s.

Disclaimer: If you buy the above stocks because of this post, the next house you buy will be haunted by bearshitting ghosts. And, you may lose money.

I know the bird feeders from CNBC read iBankCoin, after all, who doesn’t? Note to Sideshow Bob: quit thieving from “The Fly,” it’s very uncouth. Everyone knows, I’ve been highlighting my 4g/smartphone thesis for months now. There is no need to jack ideas, asshole: GO GET YOUR OWN.

Just when you thought the market was dead and buried, BAM, it wakes up like a hungry zombie and eats your brains, tartare style. Nonetheless, the warning flare is still out there for you nerdtrons to adhere to. Make sure to take some stock off the table, before September. Remember that.

Looking at my 4g watchlist, Brightpoint, Inc. [[CELL]] , Alcatel-Lucent (ADR) [[ALU]] , Apple Inc. [[AAPL]] and RF Micro Devices, Inc. [[RFMD]] are breaking the chains of boredom, while Ciena Corporation [[CIEN]] , Marvell Technology Group Ltd. [[MRVL]] and SanDisk Corporation [[SNDK]] rip the lungs out of those who short them. For a trade, I like Huntington Bancshares Incorporated [[HBAN]] , American Capital Ltd. [[ACAS]] and TEKELEC [[TKLC]] . Longer term, I am emphatic about [[ENTR]] . As for Flotek Industries, Inc. [[FTK]] : fuckfaces.

Into this rally, I will put some cash to work, on a short term basis.

NOTE: Don Harrold will be blogging here for a few days. Enjoy.

Secretly, most of you wish death upon “The Fly.” Come to think of it, if I was a low level card puncher like you, I’d hate me too, always bragging about dumbass monetary victories and other shit. It gets boring and grating; I know, but don’t care enough to change. Some of you will never listen, no matter what. I respect that.

When I was half-way retarded, new in the business, I never took advice either. I wanted to learn for myself, even if it meant my head had to be tossed into a commercial size fan. Unfortunately, it took egregious losses and multitudes of missed opportunities to become God-like, living in under the umbrella of “God-ville” (no idea what the fuck that means). A wise man once told me, and I quote: “the quickest way to success is emulate those who have already made it.” After that, he started ranting about “faking it till you make it” and all sorts of stupid shit; then I lost interest and told him to go fuck his fishtank.

The point I am trying to make: The NY Mets are a really shitty baseball team. They should cease thinking for themselves and copy the Yankees, without variance, until they learn that shit (whatever the fuck the Yankees do) with their eyes closed, hands cut off and tossed into the Harlem River.

Regarding the market: the rally has ended; but I will not short stocks. Instead, I will bide my time, building watchlists for purchase. I have a 60%+ cash position and will be sitting pretty, if the market corrects. Back to my original point of not trying to catch tops: I am not. I had an exceptional situation today, with one of my motherfucking/bloodsucking positions getting raped by the assfuckers at Flotek. I had to lower the boom, since I could not afford to let the banana be mistaken for a penis (I may have that backwards, who gives a fuck, right?), while visiting the gorilla factory, if you know what I mean.

It’s Africa hot in NYC today and I am –the fuck– out of here.

I made my moves, by way of blowing the fuck out of another 30% of my holdings. There is no need to press the envelope any further with wishful trades. “The Fly” has the patience of a chestnut.

With God’s good gravy grace, I will be back to my winning ways tomorrow.

I have an interesting situation on my hands here, with my largest position Flotek Industries, Inc. [[FTK]] getting its cock blow torched. Just to be clear, FTK is my largest position, only because I sold everything else. In the big scheme of things, it’s only 5-8% of tradeable assets. Thanks to FTK’s 20% swan dive, I find myself down more than 5%, intra-day. Additionally, I do not believe the market will stop going lower here. In addition to that, I have been holding numerous positions that did not take off during the recent run. Pay attention Ladies, I am about to school you.

Because these positions were neutral to weak in a bull market, I know those fuckers will get “mushroom clouded” in a bad one. As a result of today’s black swan event, I am cleaning house—raising my cash levels to greater than 60%. The cash will not be held for more than a few days. I just need some time to figure out my next moves/set of positions.

I sold out of the following:

Chipotle Mexican Grill, Inc. [[CMG]] , Advanced Micro Devices, Inc. [[AMD]] , Brocade Communications Systems, Inc. [[BRCD]] , Ceragon Networks Ltd. [[CRNT]] and ON Semiconductor Corp. [[ONNN]] .

For now, I will hold the balance of my Huntington Bancshares Incorporated [[HBAN]] , TeleCommunication Systems, Inc. [[TSYS]] , American Capital Ltd. [[ACAS]] , [[UNG]] , TEKELEC [[TKLC]] , Flotek Industries, Inc. [[FTK]], Level 3 Communications, Inc. [[LVLT]] and [[ENTR]] positions.

NOTE: iBankCoin has a special guest blogger en route. Developing….

First, with regards to the trash haulers at Flotek Industries, Inc. [[FTK]] : they just reported an abysmal quarter. Their capital raise is not ideal, but better than the easy fix, which is a debt for equity swap. With the money they raised, the company lives to fight another day. I view the departure of the CEO as a positive development, mainly because he is old/stupid and sucks goat balls. Thank God the stock went parabolic to the upside, for little more than a week, prior to today’s castration. My sense, today will suck; but there are brighter days ahead. People who are short the stock, down in the 1’s, were doing so with the hopes of a pending bankruptcy. With today’s news, that is off the table; hence, the short covering will begin shortly.

The overall market is very weak, and may mark the beginning of a 5-10% correction. There is something different about today’s drop. It feels more real, like it has meaning. I will not be buying this dip. At the moment, I am blessed with a 35% cash position and the patience of an Ox in a fresh water lake, with lots of snacks lying around.

Aside from FTK and Huntington Bancshares Incorporated [[HBAN]] , my positions are doing okay. Nonetheless, Flotek is certainly fucking with my numbers—pushing me deep in the red for the day.

In short: I am not buying the dip, nor am I hedging. I am just waiting around for something interesting to happen.