iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
21,264 Blog Posts

Late Night Thought

Chuck Norris is client #1, of course.

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24 comments

  1. alphadawgg

    Some time ago, I was sparring with Chuck Norris and punched his chest hairs clean off. He told me to “cut it out”. So I laughed and spit on him.

    He has not troubled me since.

    If you have other “top ten” clients that need “humbling”, let me know.

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  2. JakeGint

    Chuck Norris visited AlphaDawg, briefly, when MOS was approaching $120.

    Alphadawg is now — to close friends and relatives — known as “OmegaCur”, and MOS?

    Well…..

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  3. mdawsz

    I rocked it today with my front month FSLR puts.

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  4. mdawsz

    We’re talkin about some sweet cabbage.

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  5. alphadawgg

    Jake recently returned from FL with an “Angelo tan”.

    Nice going, Jake.

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  6. Gio

    I was client number 14. But then I found out how much it cost.

    … did u see his tab? It was like $2600 if I read the report right (dangit, I was bored)

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  7. Juice

    Fly, if you removed my ‘prostitution should be legal’ post, you’re a hairless pussy.

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  8. Juice

    On second thought, neveryousmind .. I am honored to have posts deleted.

    So, thanksyou.

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  9. Juice

    Its official … No Recession for the USofA !!

    hip hip hoorah

    I got some beachfront property for sale, anyone interested?

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  10. meatballs

    Free money for everybody. Grab your crappy assets and trade ’em in for fresh dollars. All around the world. yaaaaaa hooooooo. I’m taking my 20 year old car and getting new freshly printed dollars.

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  11. Dover

    Eliot Spitzer looks like Bill Cowher with his fucking mustache punched off.

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  12. Gunners

    WOW! i’m glad i sold all my SKF and FXP yesterday. premarket is looking ridiculous

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  13. CubsRock

    Nice Gunners.

    I got long 2 days early. I have never been up so much Pre-Market, I’m almost shakin :/

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  14. JakeGint

    While, I’m slightly nettled about my Skiffles (just an opp to buy more, methinks), I’m sure glad I didn’t sell any of my Yukon Cornelius with this kind of bullshit going on.

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  15. calvino

    I see no reason to stop the Tresaury notes exchange at AAA rated mortgages. I see old car deeds, Wendy’s gift certificates, new Iraqi Dinars as the next wave of good collateral, as the bearded one continues on his wanton path.

    btw.. the Swiss cheese hole punchers at Credit Suisse just upgraded Lulu. Maybe they like exercising in unisex leotards before their strategy meetings – they surea s fuck are not good at investing. Nevertheless, Lulu shorts are doubly fucked here, so take your money and let us see the bounce.

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  16. JakeGint

    Cubs, don’t stay long, long.

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  17. JakeGint

    Bank Prez’dent: Ah gots 17 2-for-$1 Frosty coupons.

    Bernake: Good for $1 million, pay me back when you can.

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  18. Client # 9

    I’m trading in my $1 billion in accumulated future hooker credits for some cash. I’ll need it to pay for my criminal lawyers and divorce lawyers. Sheees, thank you ben bernake, thank you Fed.

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  19. TraderCaddy

    Uncle Ben is finally putting his Princeton education to good use and looks like the monetizing of some of the mortgages will “unfreeze” the lending arena. The central bank coordination to this extent is the largest I recall since the mid-90s. Dollar should go up,oil and gold should start to head down, and equities up.

    Client #9- You are a very bad bad boy.

    Where is Chucky Schumer?

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  20. CubsRock

    Yeah Jake, my plan was to play the bounce in the financials. After this rally I will be saying fuck it and staying in Cash for a while.

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  21. Juice

    I got long a painful 1/2 day early … Bailed out by our socialist/commie government of bailouts! What a great country!

    Now I can flip all those buys for a gain.

    Phew!

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  22. The Fly

    Juice:

    I didn’t touch your whore loving post. Must’ve been the author.

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  23. TraderCaddy

    WB – Up over 10%. Never remember seeing something like that except in turnaround Tuesday 10/20/87.
    Jones Soda at $3.00? Good call Cramer.

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  24. Juice

    I have never loved a whore with my post in my life!

    That said, I have met more whores who were better company than those legal whores who marry for money.

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