Today’s Bounty; Stepping Aside With Some Cash in Hand

Last night I was “moderating” on WallStreetBets, the popular sub-reddit for finance, when all of a sudden a SALTY MOTHERFUCKER came upon me and started to fuck with my divine powers. The other mods were all like jealous little bitches that Dr. Fly was amongst them, being a Divine God with Supreme Commander medals upon his person. This one chap STRIPPED ME and subjugated all of my comments to their fag-box to rot in hell. This comes after yours truly just cemented a viral post, extracting information from another autistic retard who took $3k and leveraged it to $1.7m.

This of course could not and would not stand.

So I did what any reasonable and rationale man would do — take to Twitter and press my case with the founder. He recommended I write this mod a “strongly worded letter” — which I already had done.

See, I said something nice pic.twitter.com/YjIMn9r0GD

— The_Real_Fly (@The_Real_Fly) November 6, 2019

Shortly thereafter, my powers were restored, the faggot who stripped me put into his place, Le Fly reigns supreme once again.

Now that I got the childish antics out of the way, I can tell you what I did today.

BAM! slaps 5 fish onto your fucking desk.

TVIX +3.3%
(NEWR -5%)
PODD +3.2%
CYBR +11%
COHR +1.2%

No big deal. I was in the hole in PODD — they came out and smashed earnings and now I’m profitable. CYBR smashed and NEWR fucked over. All in all, a fine bounty.

I verified it and it’s fucking real. Someone used the “Infinite Leverage” cheat on Robinhood and did this.

$3k to $1.7m at Robinhood courtesy of high level autism @wallstreetbets pic.twitter.com/cM09LZVKWa

— The_Real_Fly (@The_Real_Fly) November 6, 2019

ROBINHOOD WHAT THE FUCK pic.twitter.com/BAZpbPnEaO

— The_Real_Fly (@The_Real_Fly) November 6, 2019

OH SHIT ITS REAL. $3k turned into $1.7m on Robinhood using INFINITE LEVERAGE CHEAT pic.twitter.com/oFloUhFBNI

— The_Real_Fly (@The_Real_Fly) November 6, 2019

This fucking psycho took $3k and sold ITM calls to infinity and then margined the fuck out of it. He’s either going to be on a yacht soon or in jail.

You can view the thread on WallStreetBets here.

In July, Robinhood raised money and was valued at $7.6b and planned to IPO in late 2019 or 2020. Given the recent turn of events, where they quite literally cannot stop the buying, I don’t see how that is possible. Who in their right fucking mind wants to own this business?

Market breadth is at 54% and the most exciting part of my day is making fun of the millennial RETARDS on WallStreetBets — who by the way — fucking BANNED my account there from commenting.

Here are my private conversations, in an attempt to unban myself

So I joined WallStreetBets and was instantly told to fuck off. Here is my approach to negotiating with the mods. Any advice? pic.twitter.com/YpXGol4uPo

— The_Real_Fly (@The_Real_Fly) November 5, 2019

Taking a personal day today, got some stuff to do with Mrs. Fly. Life is good — will be cavorting in Chapel Hill this evening. Should you run across me and ask for an autograph, prepare for a stiff roundhouse to the jaw for interrupting me.

UPDATE ON MY WALLSTREETBETS NEGOTIATIONS

UPDATE: The fucker who banned me got himself banned by the founder of WSB. The Fly wins again.

Gents named “MoonYachts” have been gaming the Robinhood platform, accessing limitless buying power by buying stock, writing ITM calls, doing it again, and then accessing the leverage Robinhood grants them. One bloke took a $4k account and leveraged it to over $1m. The losses on these trades are staggering and Robinhood will now be chasing absolute morons for monies that cannot be recovered. They eat the bag.

With Bloomberg, Zerohedge, and others covering this scheme now, pray tell me — how does the CEO of Robinhood explain this during his next cap raise?

Many, many, many of my readers have emailed and tweeted about a Robinhood exploit that goes by the charming and accurate name “infinite leverage.” Here’s a Reddit user called ControlTheNarrative who claims to have gotten 25x leverage on his trading; that is, he put in $2,000 and turned it into about $50,000 worth of stock. Here’s another Reddit user called MoonYachts who claims to have gotten 250x leverage, putting in $4,000 and turning it into a $1,000,000 stock position. You are not supposed to be able to do this; normal stock market games do not allow you to bet a million dollars by putting up only $4,000 of your own. (“We’re aware of the isolated situations and communicating directly with customers,” said a Robinhood spokesperson.)

These people are posting screenshots and videos of their exploits. They are discussing ways to use the exploit for further, even more outrageous pranks. I do not exactly know what they are thinking. Presumably some part of what they are thinking is along the lines of “if I use $4,000 to buy a million dollars’ worth of stock and it goes up then I will make a lot of money.” But surely another big part of what they are thinking is “if I use $4,000 to buy a million dollars’ worth of stock then my friends on Reddit will be amused.” Judging by the Reddit threads, and by my email inbox, this was a correct analysis. I suppose it is not a conventional financial analysis, but you should not underestimate the importance, in trading generally, of impressing people with your wit and boldness. For what do we live, but to make sport for r/wallstreetbets, and laugh at it in our turn?

Are the lads on WallsteetBets, a retarded sub-reddit littering the internet with inane gambling tactics, contrite over this event?

Not even close. In fact, they’re scheming how to do it again and celebrating the attention.

I suppose one could argue — Robinhood gets what they deserve, in this case a bunch of broke ass destitute millennial bitches, drowning in student debt, attempting to get rich quick like their favorite rappers, by exploiting bad code by a sub-par broker dealer — ironically coined after the legendary thief of the rich.

The simulation does have a sense of humor.

Just like last year this time, rates are fucking soaring again.

BUT, no one really gives a shit. Right now all we’re seeing are Utes are REITs get hit, and some old man cleaning product stocks. The real meat and potatoes, the leveraged loans and junk bonds are unscathed. So, until you can show me some damage in those areas of the market, we are supremely bullish.

That being said, rates are rising and it’s causing gold to get smashed to fucking bits. The whole dichotomy between rates and gold is real, so bear that in mind while investing. I had a busy morning — just getting in. Will explore the market now.

Ten years ago I’d know about this fucking retard on day 1. But because I am getting older and less in touch with FUCKING RETARDS, I did not. Apparently, folks from Reddit have figured out schemes to get FREE BUYING POWER from the morons at Robinhood. One moron, took a $2k account and levered it 25x and ended up -$60k.

What do you fuckers know about this?

UPDATE: They are planning to bankrupt Robinhood.

More from the retards.

Robinhood is fucked

A lot of feverish hatred in the comments section. By hatred I mean absolute silence of the deafening type — with Le Fly candidly bowling on fuckers from atop his steeply placed estate, up 14 out of his last 15 trades. I invite you to try to stop me, or dare I suggest challenge me to a stock picking contest. I will absolutely poleax you into another realm.

That being said, Admiral Fly made several bold moves today, plenty in the high beta, degenerate fields of the market. I closed out the session a winner — 10% cash, 100% win.

Markets moved up a bunch, breadth was weak, and most people got fucked today in fantastical ways — specifically because you’re not keeping up with the trends. The reason why you’re trading poorly is lack of information. You’re a low info invalid.

Time for me to fuck off.

Ciao.

I’m busy now, doing shit. Here are my last 13 trades. Indeud.
SPNS +4.4%

ZEN +6.1%
CROX +4.55%
OSPN +4.1%
TZA +2.4%
(TWLO -12.8%)
FTNT +13.6%
BILI +6.66%
DHI – wash
TWOU +8.64%
GOOS +4.92%
CTRP +3.31%
NUGT +4.4%

Thats 1 loss out of my last 13 closed trades — goat fuckers.

Off to eat some lunch.

I woke up this morning and had another runner. It’s not a big deal really, only a 12% sprinter out of the gates. I sold TWOU for profit and now find myself hampered with an outrageous cash sum of 5%, not knowing where to place it. Maybe one of you could offer me an idea or two? This poor Fly is getting old and his brain doesn’t work like it once did. Maybe you could find the kindness inside of your little hearts to offer me some financial advice so that I might profit and perhaps earn enough money to eat a steak sandwich one day?

Just kidding — and the fuck out of here.

Do you think a man, such as myself, motherufucking Space Alien Magician (SAM) would ever take advice from the likes of you? You’re part of the reader class of people, whilst I am the writer, the artist — toiling atop of a hot hot laptop, trading like the fucking wind. Any idea how hard it is to do this shit?

NOT HARD AT ALL, as a point in fact — because I am of genius intellect. I can spit out trades and blogs like spitting gun out into a baseball field in between innings. It comes natural to me. I can pick a fucking stock today, and see it run higher tomorrow. I do this shit all the time.

Will I teach you to become a better trader?

ABSOLUTELY NOT. The fuck out of here with that shit. If you’re 40 years old and can’t trade well — you never will trade well. You are here simply for the fish that I provide. This is a white glove service, old sport. Enjoy it while it lasts — because nothing lasts forever.