GLOBAL CRASH LOOMING

Hat tip to Boomer

“A very nasty period is soon to be upon us – be prepared,” said Bob Janjuah, the bank’s credit strategist.

Have a goodnight, fuckface. See you in the morning.

The moon and the sun are now realigned, enabling “The Fly” to bank coin without distractions.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VnRWRQ74-wg 450 300]

Up 2.6% for the day, bitches.

I really want to make [[CATY]] the fifth “Reverse Horseman,” but I can’t. I must anoint the morons at [[PACW]] with this ungodly title, who, without doubt, are very busy eating through capital like pacman—as you read this.

Basically, PACW is a play to bet against the California mortgage market, like [[DSL]] and [[FED]]. For fucks sake, they lost $10 per share last quarter.

Look for a dividend cut, as the credit markets worsen.

As for CATY:

It’s a perfect blend of Chinese fuckery and bad California mortgages and HELOC’s. Cathay services the Chinese-American community, in the most egregious fashion—via bad loans.

Basically, on face value, CATY appears to be handling the ‘credit crisis’ quite well. However, I believe they are greatly understating their bad loan exposure. On top of that, the company, egregiously, bought back 2.8 million shares @ $32, in 2007, burning through 92 million dollars.

For now, my top bank shorts are “The Reverse Five Horseman”: [[DSL]], [[FED]], [[FHN]], [[CORS]] and [[PACW]]. Also, I think there is considerable downside in CATY, [[EWBC]], [[CSE]], [[WTFC]] and [[BBT]].

NOTE: Pardon my misstep with the financials, during yesterday’s tape—via buying some. What was I thinking? Aside from [[UB]], I am back to betting against them.

Exclusive:

Finally, I have revealed my identity.

I bought 1,000 [[RIG]] @ $146.87.

Disclaimer: If you buy RIG because of this post, a swarm of locusts will descend on your property, in biblical fashion. And, you may lose money.

“So Spaniard, we shall go to Rome together and have bloody adventures. And the great whore will suckle us until we are fat and happy and can suckle no more. And then, when enough men have died, perhaps you will have your freedom.”

Proximo, Gladiator, 2000

I sold short 5,000 [[CATY]] @ $13.38, 2,000 [[WTFC]] @ $25.93, 2,000 [[PACW]] @ $16.90 and 2,000 [[CSE]] @ $15.19.

Disclaimer: If you sell short the above names, because of this post, your local grocery store will jack corn prices up by 200%. And, you may lose money.

I sold 5,000 [[ZION]] @ $33 and 10,000 [[CMA]] @ $31.80.

I sold out of my stupid [[ZION]] and [[CMA]] positions, for a quick loss.

At the same time, I bought a little more [[UB]]. This is a stubborn trade. I am going against what I believe, which is to kill the banks then urinate on their graves.

I do not like banks. Actually, I hate them. Here I am, like some sort of fucktard, buying them—when I should be selling them short.

There are significant breakdowns all over the sector. From [[WM]] to [[WB]], it looks like the bulls are throwing in the towel, following GS‘s quick “shitting of the shower.”

To hedge my UB position, immediately, I will be selling short [[CATY]], [[PACW]], [[WTFC]] and [[CSE]].