I Am Busy…

…therefore, you are not privy to “The Fly’s” thoughts, trades or oddball hobbies. I will be out most of the day, on business, eating lamb and drink the milk of goats. In case you were wondering, I am not afraid of any market pullbacks. As a matter of fact, I am sure the market will rally, in the face of horrifying economic data.

Glossing over my positions, I am down a bit this morning, no more than 0.5%. My intention, with the grace of God, buy 4G/smartphone stocks on a pullback and allocate 20% of my capital to foreign names.

At the moment, I like the action in Sonus Networks, Inc. [[SONS]] , Corning Incorporated [[GLW]] and Flotek Industries, Inc. [[FTK]]

My offices are decorated with diamonds. My coffee mugs are made from platinum, sans the handles. My form of transportation is one that travels at the speed of light and dispatches nuclear bomb hand grenades from a velvet cargo bay, onto the rooftops of my enemies.

“The Fly” has larger dicked gains than you and there is nothing you or your stupid friends can do about it.

Top picks: Flotek Industries, Inc. [[FTK]] , [[RAX]] , Hercules Offshore, Inc. [[HERO]] , Tesoro Corporation [[TSO]]

I bought 20,000 [[RAX]] @ $13.84.

Disclaimer: If you buy RAX because of this post, large rats will eat your pantry clean. And, you may lose money.

I sold out of ANADIGICS, Inc. [[ANAD]] around $4.01, Sunstone Hotel Investors, Inc [[SHO]] , between $6.29 and $6.49, Complete Production Services, Inc. [[CPX]] @ $9.90.

New buys pending.

Late stage rallies call for the arrival of egregious short squeezes. If you have been paying close attention, over the past 6 months, the biggest winners have been the stocks with the largest short positions, like Crocs, Inc. [[CROX]] and Fuqi International, Inc. [[FUQI]] . If you were smart, which most of you are not, you would position yourself alongside men who fly in spaceships, getting long names with large short positions.

A little fyi for you assholes out there, Flotek Industries, Inc. [[FTK]] has a short position of 25% and is in a sector that is on the cusp of turning the corner. Providing FTK can get the cocks out of their ears, the stock can see $10, sometime this year.

Tesoro Corporation [[TSO]] has a short position approaching 18% of the total outstanding shares, yet the refinery business is recovering. In my opinion, a lot of stubborn bears are about to get lit aflame in that name.

Look people, I can’t give you my brain, so that you can make more money in the markets. I can lead you to the water; however, if you drown in it, that is entirely on you. So you know, “The Fly” has been basking in the glory of his marksman-like positioning, over the past 6 months, all the while most of his competitors blew themselves up—trapped inside of “fag-boxes” aka inverse ETF’s.

Some other potential short squeezes to consider are Synaptics, Incorporated [[SYNA]] , American Axle & Manufact. Holdings, Inc. [[AXL]] , Netflix, Inc. [[NFLX]] , SL Green Realty Corp. [[SLG]] , Cypress Semiconductor Corporation [[CY]] , MannKind Corporation [[MNKD]] and SVB Financial Group [[SIVB]] .

Despite the recession, people in America are still stuffing their fat faces in record fashion. From apples to zucchini, this country is chockful of languid burger biters, who’d rather frequent their local artery clogging fast food chain than a treadmill.

I have invested in many names, in numerous industries, over the past 6 months. However, ever since receiving a “summer beatdown,” a few years back, long NutriSystem Inc. [[NTRI]] , “The Fly” has not invested alongside upright walking pigs, who regularly ask for “MORE BREAD” at their favorite eatery. Nonetheless, with the economy ROARING BACK (ROFL!), I have decided to burden myself by investing in America’s heart attack production facilities aka restaurants.

My top 5 restaurant stocks are:

Chipotle Mexican Grill, Inc. [[CMG]] Buffalo Wild Wings [[BWLD]] [[MCD]] Panera Bread Company [[PNRA]] Tim Hortons Inc. (USA) [[THI]]

Going with that theme, considering the Kraft Foods Inc. [[KFT]] for Cadbury plc (ADR) [[CBY]] bid, I like Hansen Natural Corporation [[HANS]] and Dr Pepper Snapple Group Inc. [[DPS]] .

My long-shot picks are [[JSDA]] , [[RUTH]] and The Pantry, Inc. [[PTRY]]

The dollar is a piece of shit. Hence, you’d be a moron not to be long commodities, in some form. If gold and silver gives you morning wood, so be it. However, I am into buying commodities that people actually use. Hence, I like to consider myself an oilman.

Via The PPT:

Top 3 Oil & Gas Equipment Service Stocks

Cal Dive International, Inc. [[DVR]] GulfMark Offshore, Inc. [[GLF]] Baker Hughes Incorporated [[BHI]]
Top 3 Independent Oil & Gas Stocks

Stone Energy Corporation [[SGY]] Talisman Energy Inc. (USA) [[TLM]] CNOOC Limited (ADR) [[CEO]]
Top 3 Oil & Gas Refinery Stocks

Murphy Oil Corporation [[MUR]] CVR Energy, Inc. [[CVI]] Holly Corporation [[HOC]]
Top 3 Oil & Gas Pipeline Stocks

Magellan Midstream Partners, L.P. [[MMP]] Genesis Energy, L.P. [[GEL]] Enbridge Inc. (USA) [[ENB]]

Top 3 Oil & Gas & Exploration Stocks

Pride International, Inc. [[PDE]] Enerplus Resources Fund (USA) [[ERF]] Noble Corporation [[NE]]

Bonus:

Top 3 Stocks, ranked by technicals

Brigham Exploration Company [[BEXP]] American Oil & Gas Inc. [[AEZ]] Kodiak Oil & Gas Corp. [[KOG]]

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kFw2RoJ2A4U 616 500]

My email box is flooded with apology notes, written by halphazard bastards who doubted me. These creatures of the night were throwing coleslaw at me, no more than 1 week ago. Yet, today, they find themselves groveling for forgiveness at the feet of “Le Fly,” grasping onto my robe, pleading for help. I do not accept apologies, small men of the web. I warned you about betting against me, yet you chose to ignore the prophecy. Emphatically, I pointed to an instrument of mathematical precision, The PPT, which called another short term bottom in equities to the exact day, yet again. And, amusingly enough, you laughed at me.

You laughed, while stuffing your big fat faces with 80% hamburgers, on the way to your local cardiologist for emergency heart surgery. You laughed, while “The Fly” struggled, in the trenches, knocking off one mustache to the next. Finally, you laughed, while your head got smashed in with a claw-hammer doused with mustard.

There is a lesson to be had, good people of the interwebs; and I am here to teach it. I do it through wit and charm, with a little sarcasm and outright “round the bend” demeanor about me. In time, you will learn to respect me, else feel the wrath of my claw-hammer against your little pebble sized brain.

In short: “The Fly” wins again.

I bought 5,000 Hercules Offshore, Inc. [[HERO]] @ $4.65 and 10,000 Western Refining, Inc. [[WNR]] @ $5.89.

Disclaimer: If you buy the above stocks because of this post, the next time you turn the your car ignition on, your car will blow up. And, you may lose money.