CARTOONISH GAINS AWAIT

I don’t find it to be useful to discuss news anymore, especially when it pertains to stocks. The pattern has repeated itself so often, I feel like a fool– attributing some “news event” as a catalyst that seemingly and magically boosts stocks higher. Stocks trade higher because they’re mandated to do so. The game is rigged and in our favour. US market are outperforming all other markets. Our wars are going according to plan and we’ve managed to upset almost every single nation in the middle east, without blinking an eye. So much for worrying about lighting a match inside of a powder keg.

Ladies and gentleman of the interwebs: S&P futures are up more than 15. The Dow is scheduled (British accent) to open up more than 140 points. This isn’t a game anymore. It never has been a game, even though a great lot of you treat it as one.

I stand to make pornographic gains at the onset of trading.

A great man once said: “It’s gonna be a hot summer.”

NOTE: As you white trashed out losers suck down budweiser cans and blow your arms off with blockbusters, choking on overcooked beef, Le Fly is drinking his usual Earl Grey, listening to a little Glass.

Have a listen, if you dare to be so bold, yet distinguished.
[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q2-QkG8Zkh4 603 500]

Try not to blow your fingers off, tossing those m-80’s around the neighborhood. I once knew a girl who fell victim to that, blew her fingers clean off her hand. Such a shame, being that she was a pretty girl.

We all made money and have positioned to profit from any and all rebellions in the middle east. Let’s not go back and forth about the markets for the next 24 hours, ok?

It’s time to get “our white trash on” and inebriate ourselves to the point of being poisoned.

Life for most is very short, unlike The Fly who is immortal. So make the best of it and never, ever, let inhibitions infect your psyche. We are all entitled to magnanimous success and spoils.

When I was a young punk broker, pumping out 100k per mo in commissions, unhappy at my firm because I felt “neglected”, my old CEO gave me a piece of advice that sticks with me to this day. He said “Fly, the squeaky wheel gets the oil.”

Life isn’t going to come to you. You need to go and get it.

Drive safely.

The Arab Spring continues, redundantly, yet again!

CNBC is reporting a military coup is ‘in progress’, with the arrest of several players inside of the psychopath Morsi administration. Naturally, this is ‘good news’, as war always is. Moreso, the carnival clowns who were ruling Egypt with a Koran will soon be under arrest and sent to receive their virgin wives.

I told you Portugal was a non-factor. Now how many suckers bought into the futures market, going short, thinking the US was about to nosedive? Whoever did, especially when the SPY futs were down 12, now find themselves floating around in outerspace, locked in a ‘fagbox‘.

I am 120% invested, long, without a care in the world. I told you yesterday, the market isn’t chasing higher, but simply resting or “taking it easy” ahead of the 4th of July festivities. Mark my words, we are setting up for another leg up.

The FRO is running again. There will be winners and losers in this Egyptian unrest situation. Just know, FRO doesn’t bother taking stupid crude from the middle east and delivering it to China or the US. PFFFFFF. There isn’t any money in that, believe it or not. They prefer to do business with the Africanus, a much more pleasurable route, albeit a money loser as well. So perhaps the specter of the Suez canal closing has people in the bit of a frenzy to own oil tanker stocks? Perhaps.

However, they’d be remiss to believe this run up is sustainable. I am a net seller of FRO into what I consider to be “another gift.” It’s not that I do not like FRO. It’s just that the time and the place for it to really go higher isn’t now.

In other news, AAPL looks encouraging and OCZ is always of interest to me. I’ve been thinking about buying into this stock for weeks now. With 40% of its cap in cash, no debt, and its peer, STEC, being bought out at a 100% premium, OCZ looks intriguing.

For now, top picks are IMMR, O and FWM.

This is truly orchestrated. Do not believe anything other than what you see on the surface.

Portuguese yields are soaring, up 150 bps, above 8%– thanks to something we already knew about that no one really cares about.

Egypt is readying to throw hard liner Muslims into the Suez canal to drown and oil is soaring, as a result– just in time for summer!

Pardon my sarcasm.

Refiners work under these conditions. Watch the Brent-WTI spread. If it widens, buy WNR, HFC, DK, ALJ and CVI with both hands and testicles.

May the French fry eaters in Portugal die hard.

I am painting a masterpiece and you bozos are making too much noise in the studio.

Did you see FWM and O shoot higher into the close? Indeud.

Have you taken a look at FRO and OWW today?

I had a good day.

Stay tuned, small punks. I have a lotta more for you (clubber lang).

I sold out of UNXL and OWW, one for a 4% loss, the other for an 11% gain. Let’s be frank, as well as clear, one of those picks came from the mind of a financial genius, the other from a vagrant.

With the proceeds and a little bit of leverage, I bought into the fat faced American, going long FWM.

In addition, I bought O, the REIT, intended to protect my gains during the arduous months of July and August.

Yes, it is my belief that rates will drop again. Hence, any REIT purchased now can and will be sold later at a profit.

So far, the market isn’t showing any signs of let up, despite what the stick eaters in the comments section like to say. You have your cocaine, gorilla, train raping markets and then you have this, something a bit more austere. How do I say, something more relaxed, discrete, ceremonial even.

Try to avoid being stupid by going against the trend all the time. It works until it doesn’t work anymore. Get it? You can get lucky only so many times. Eventually, markets go higher and you will be left holding your nuts.

Look at these food related stocks, lifting off. It shouldn’t come as a surprise, considering the drop in inputs prices. All commodities, save cattle, have been coming in, allowing grocers to make even more money.

Do you believe I am messing with you?

I am not messing with you.

Have a look at RNDY, WFM, NGVC, FWM, SVU, KR– the list goes on and on.

On the restaurant end, there is NDLS going bananas, not to mention CMG, KKD, DNKN, PNRA and FRGI offering consistent returns.

I don’t know why I stopped buying food and beverage stocks. For a while, it’s all I did. I used to partake in sheer debauchery, gobbling up shares of BWLD and HANS, testing their products out for sport.

I once commissioned a former blogger of ours to “search for Java.” He did a vid to document his struggles.

Last year I was buying PPC around $4; now I’m an idiot–watching the stock spiral higher.

There is something to be said about the fatness of the American people. They like to stuff their round faces with creamed cheese, popped corn and bottles upon bottles of SODA pop.

Why bother researching anything else?

Food for thought (pun intended).

I told you your scalp was going to be cut off. Now you get to sit back and “enjoy” capital losses.

Let’s keep this simple, folks (extra Denninger). The yen is decidedly lower, stocks are higher and gold is still for misfits.

I like AMBA up to $20, SHLD for a squeeze and IMMR because haptics is the way of the future (no Howard Hughes).

LED lighting is all the rage. Have a look at CREE. I have another LED stock that is ready to go and it’s not RBCN. Stay tuned.

Many of you were lured into another bear trap this afternoon. With both the SPY and Dow plummeting from its highs, the Russell, as represented by IWM, held its own.

Have a look.

Forget about everything else. The Russell is the market, represented a wide array of names, irrespective of market capitalization. At the very highs of the session, I was +3.1% and ended up 2.4%, hardly a pullback–indeud.

What I am trying to illuminate to you is the underlying strength of today’s tape. My OWW didn’t pull back, neither did IMMR. We’re gonna make private prison money in the smaller cap names soon, coming up immediately.

The Devil is perplexed over the abrasive robustness of the IWM and how it pertained to his stupid puts. We shall oversee those puts trade down to zero tomorrow, such is the prophecy of The Fly. Ordained by the stock Gods and Shadows del Urinal, we shall eat his liver for lunch–laughing all the way to church.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tBDes9TuGBg