18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
18,718 Blog Posts

Morning Poppers (Equities are for Olde Men Edition)

What are you still doing here and why aren’t you logged into your Coinbase account to trade some Rare Pepe Cash? I’m days away from publishing my new book — about 33,500 words, so if you haven’t read the first part and want to get Grandma a nice Xmas present, buy it now. Once I get iBank Bitcoins up and running, the rare art on that book cover will be worth millions alone. Just think about all of the money you can make on the iBank Bitcoins are will spill out into the world, introducing the younger generation to “The Fly” and his violent ways.


Via Zerohedge:

For those keeping track, this is how long it has taken the cryptocurrency to cross the key psychological levels:

$0000 – $1000: 1789 days
$1000- $2000: 1271 days
$2000- $3000: 23 days
$3000- $4000: 62 days
$4000- $5000: 61 days
$5000- $6000: 8 days
$6000- $7000: 13 days
$7000- $8000: 14 days
$8000- $9000: 9 days
$9000-$10000: 2 days
$10000-$11000: 1 day
$11000-$12000: 6 days
$12,000-$13,000: 17 hours
$13,000-$14,000: 4 hours
$14,000-$15,000: 10 hours

Total market value of cryptos is now $410b.

Listen, I’m very busy right now and do not have time to cater to your every whim. There’s lots of ways to make money today — just quit dicking around and pay attention for once, will ya?

Here’s some news to start your day.

SAGE +46.9% (reports positive top-line results from phase 2 placebo-controlled trial of SAGE-217),
Tesla: Anheuser-Busch InBev (BUD) placed order for 40 TSLA semi-trucks
Galectin Therapeutics target raised to $10 at H.C. Wainwright — The market gets it wrong, again
Mellanox Tech target raised to $70 at Stifel
Edwards Lifesciences reaffirms FY17 outlook, provides FY18 projections, approves new $1 bln share repurchase program
Lam Research upgraded to Buy from Neutral at Nomura
Shake Shack upgraded to Equal-Weight from Underweight at Morgan Stanley
Commercial Metals upgraded to Buy from Neutral at BofA/Merrill
Ctrip downgraded to Neutral from Overweight at JP Morgan
Cummins initiated with a Outperform at Oppenheimer; tgt $192
Yelp downgraded to Underweight from Neutral at Piper Jaffray; tgt lowered to $37 from $38
Goldman Sachs target raised to $300 from $290 at BofA/Merrill; Added to US 1 List

If you enjoy the content at iBankCoin, please follow us on Twitter


  1. dragun

    in all honesty you’d probably raise an easy $25M in an ICO with the name alone.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  2. sarcrilege

    Fake value: Total market value of cryptos is now $410b

    Just because the very recent (at the margin) BTC (or crypto) sold for $15,000 does not mean by any means all (every single one) btc would sell for $15,000. The last btc would have to be given away for anybody take it.

    • 2
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
    • reversion

      How long can you be wrong about everything?

      • 0
      • 0
      • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
    • ironturd

      How many people are forced to listen to your bullshit on a daily basis seeing as you don’t work and just maintain your gold treasure maps

      • 0
      • 0
      • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
    • dean05205

      Yeah the same is true for stocks you dolt

      • 0
      • 0
      • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
    • numbersgame

      Look, it’s possible for someone to be a sac of soulless sh!t and still be right.

      BTC is a illiquid market with very few sellers and very difficult to short. The price is NOT based on free-market supply and demand. It has no future, hence, no long-term value (but still great for short-term speculation)

      • 1
      • 0
      • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  3. bushwacker2

    At the current rate of bitcoin market appreciation I should be able to retire in about two weeks.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  4. bob smith

    Um Fly, could you please give us more frequent BTC updates since it has gone up over 10% since your “old news” post about it this morning. Thanks a bunch.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"