Breaking: The Ackman-Allergan Deal Isn’t Front Running–Not Even a Little Bit

“You are actually permitted to trade on insider information.”

–“Montauk Bill” Ackman, 2014

Aren’t we lucky to have heroes like Montauk Bill Ackman out there, making money for the benefit of the charities he donates to? On this glorious wednesday morning, I am also very grateful to have men like Joe Kernan, shill, CNBC, asking such hard hitting questions regarding the Valeant-Allergan-Ackman deal.

You’d also be pleased to know that another publicly traded company has approached Bill to assist them in taking over their prey, in the most hostile of ways. But he’s focused on this deal now and told those bozos to get in the back of the line and to wait their turn.

So, just to recap:

If you manage more than 10 billion dollars and a CEO from a publicly traded company calls to tell you they are going to acquire XYZ for 75% higher from where the stock trades, not only are you permitted to buy as many call options as your heart desires, it’s also your God given right– as a leader in the financial world– to profit from this exchange of information because you “never quit” and could “exact positive change” at the company you are targeting.

However, if you’re a self-made woman who sells towels at Sears and cooks pumpkin’d pies around halloween for the teevee, should your fucking broker call you up and tell you he heard XYZ is going to report bad earnings, suggesting that you sell it, should you do that, you will go straight to prison for several years.

Any questions?

Now that the market is rebounding, I am looking at a few things to keep me 110% long, as I attempt to claw back from a 30% deficit.

1. Facebook’s earnings. I feel good about them and expect them to beat and guide up.

2. AMZN and Apple earnings. They aren’t very important for momo names, more for the general health of the economy.

3. Alibaba’s IPO.

Bar none, the most important of the three, for Wall Street upright walking pigs, is the latter. This is going to be the biggest tech ipo ever. It might fetch $200 billion. I put the chances of the market being uprooted, from now until then (possibly next week), at a stiff 0%.

Now that we know David Einhorn is short a “bubble basket” of stocks, it’s only apropos for them to rip tits to the upside with reckless abandon, no?

So many of you clowns are invested, mind you, in the ideology that we are at a top. Nothing other than price action is guiding you. You are unable to think for yourselves, objectively, as you fall victim to the stiff winds from the east. Watch the people on the teevee talk down today’s rally, the sixth consecutive up day following a ridiculous decline.

While you keep watching bonds, pondering why the world’s most manipulated market is misbehaving, stocks are rebounding. A lot of important hedge fund managers are short tech stocks here, working overtime to get them lower, by hook or crook. Their influence only goes as far as you allow it to go.

I made back nearly 3% today, down 19% for the year.

NOTE: Towards the end of the session, I added to both YELP and FEYE.

If these earnings reports come in better than expected, you are going to bear witness to an amazing short squeeze, one for the ages.

I was able to contain myself for about 30 minutes, until the shadows inside of my bathroom urinal, who speak with a distinct Edward G. Robinson accent, told me “to shut up, see, quit being a coward, right, and go buy some DATA.”

When I got back to my desk, I bought DATA.

Hence, a new horseman has been forged in the fires of hades, mixed in with a little piss and vinegar (pun intended).

In all seriousness, I feel extremely confident regarding DATA down here, especially heading into earnings. They’ve been smashing expectations to pieces.

I have made back almost 10% from the lows of last week. When staring at the abyss, all I could think about was how stupid I was for holding these four horsemen all the way down. Since the bounce, I sold half of my WDAY position and all of my SPLK. I added to YELP (sub $60) and have been very patient with FEYE. I even added a new position today: TWTR.

Part of me wants to go out there and buy PANW, DWRE, NOW, BLOX, YY, DDD, SCTY and all of the other stocks that have been hit. However, I remember the pain and earnings are right around the corner. Should we get some earnings short falls, we’ll be heading right back towards the lows, in no time at all. I believe FB will be a major earnings driver, as well as AMZN and CUDA.

My basis for YELP is $72.43 and FEYE is $65.74. I can add to both positions now; but that would be an emotional move, based upon a feeling of euphoria and not reason. The smart move here, for me, is to wait a little longer. I am not so much hoping for a decline in YELP or FEYE to justify buying more. On the contrary, if they both head lower again, that would be vey bearish for their recoveries. I’d rather buy into strength, knowing the earnings season is going well.

Ideally, I’d prefer to avoid all earnings calls. They make me sick to my stomach, the massive gap ups and downs based upon a single report. Think how stupid that is.

Understand that I am being rational right now, but that can change by the end of the day.

I sold out of my entire SPLK position, locking in a 16% loss. With the proceeds, I will either wait around for something cool to happen, or buy more YELP and FEYE.

The dastardly bears, the guys long FAZ, pestering me in the comments section and on Twitter, now find themselves in the ‘fag box‘, sort of drifting away into black space. Perhaps I am a bit pre-mature in saying this, on the sixth consecutive up day in the face of underwhelming negative news, but the bears are without legs. There never was an argument to take down my FEYE. It was simply an old tale, told millions of times before, all to do with “over-valuation” and stock market “bubbles”–things of that nature.

Now I know your kind– very overzealous in your actions. You possess a certain avarice for having it your way, almost making you jejune to the world around you. Rest assured, all of the plans that you had coming into today are awash with the blood from your peers.You belong to a weak clan, one that survives only by killing off old members and indoctrinating new ones with dark stories, poison, and of course the specter of fame and fortune.

It is extrardinarily arrogant and narcissistic to believe that a market near all-time highs is on the precipice of collapse, all because you said so. The world, apparently, doesn’t work according to your schedule.

A fool and his money shall be parted forever.

Bastard devils, I find myself up another 2% this morning, almost breaching the down 20% line, on my way back towards the light of winship, prosperity and the god damned American way.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WM1RChZk1EU

I started a small position in $TWTR. Long term holding in the making.

Let me preface this blog by telling you I believe victim less crimes, such as egregious insider trading activities, are punished far too harshly in this country. It panders to populism, the pitched fork guy running naked in the streets after rich people. I do not believe that anyone should have his/her freedom taken away for stupid stuff, like selling XYZ ahead of a bad earnings report. Fine the person; bar them from the industry, but keep the prisons filled with child abusers instead.

Having said that, can someone please be kind enough to explain to me, in layman’s terms, as I am still reeling from the FEYE s-1 filing, how Bill Ackman is allowed to freely admit taking his single largest investment ever ($4 billion), in AGN, while knowing before hand that VRX would bid for the company?

How did Bill know before hand?

He had a deal with VRX in place that said he’d support their hostile takeover?!?

Wow.

It’s good to be King.

Barring a conflagration in Ukraine, stocks should continue higher tomorrow.

The following stocks are heavily shorted, are in hyper growth mode, ranked high by The PPT algorithms.

In case you’re wondering how The PPT Oversold signal fared, I attached a chart for all of you TEDDARDS out there.

C’mon son.