A Case of the Nervous Nellies

Critics argue that I’ve been too cautious for too long, effectively missing out on some good rallies in cocaine and other drug related stocks. The truth is, I am Rocky Balboa, post Clubber Lang knockout, scared while running on the beach with Apollo Creed.

I’ve been taken to the woodshed for two years in a row, after achieving huge gains early on. The collapse occurred the same way it always does: I get all bearish, then lose patience, invest all of my money, then the market collapses.

Rinse and repeat.

It’s the preferred recipe to cook a Fly on Wall Street.

So pardon my apprehensiveness if I opt to wait out the harder months of the year, preserving a high teenage digit return, while living the life of leisure that the Gods intended me to have. There isn’t anything wrong, per se, with having 40% of my assets in cash. It only speak to a profound act of cowardice, one that I admit to be guilty of.

One cannot expect to achieve greatness while watching from the sidelines–all very well and true. But I, my friends, am sitting on the sidelines in an Orbital Space Cannon (OSC)–fully intent on committing aggressive acts of war at a given notice.

Do not worry about Le Fly, for he is partaking in “stock market art,” using his portfolio as a canvas. In time, the gains will come together. Until the market adjusts to what I deem to be “reasonably oversold,” I will continue to flee from risk, running away with a yellow line painted on my back.