OBAMA-STOMPED

You election lovers thought we’d have a rally today, no?

“The Fly” is simply bowling on you cowards, with spiked balls covered in spicy mustard.

Check this out:

As unbelievable as it may seem, despite today’s liberal beatdown of the indices, I was down 0.45%. I enjoyed egregious wins in [[EEV]] , [[REW]] , [[SDS]] , [[FXP]] , [[DUG]] and even short Petrohawk Energy Corporation [[HK]] —despite its midday stubborness.

Let me just say, there is NO FUCKING WAY Chesapeake Energy Corporation [[CHK]] sells out to BP plc (ADR) [[BP]] , following Aubrey’s margin call sell out. No way.

Sell it 100 ways to the graveyard.

For the day, I bulked up large on the inverses. What can I say, I am in a very, very macabre sort of mood.

To be honest, as opposed to bald faced lying to you, I am uncomfortable holding BE Aerospace, Inc. [[BEAV]] and American Vanguard Corp. [[AVD]] . Nonetheless, crazy shit is known to happen in this market. Do not be shocked to see the market rally tomorrow, effectively poleaxing you goat fuckers into a very bad imbecilic situation.

Top pick: My brain

UPDATE: At the bell, I actually closed up 0.07%.

We’re back into crash mode. The Obama rally is over and The PPT is spitting out a strong sell rating on market technicals.

With my money, I’ve bulked the fuck up on a variety of downside plays. Howsoever, I did not sell BE Aerospace, Inc. [[BEAV]] , much to your chagrin. The inherent point of having a hedge is to be both long and short. So, as I bank coin in [[EEV]] , [[FXP]] , [[REW]] and [[SDS]] , I lose a little in BE Aerospace, Inc. [[BEAV]] , [[UYG]] , [[M]] , [[AYG]] —just to name a few.

See fuckers, the markets fate is not decided in one afternoon. Who knows, maybe the market goose steps higher tomorrow, amidst some really bad news.

My point is: do not get caught up in the emotions of the market. You must have iced cold ice flowing through your heart, in order to do bodily harm to trader/servant and make buckets of coin in this market.

Thus far, my only disappointment is the absurd strength in Petrohawk Energy Corporation [[HK]] . It’s sort of poetic, actually.

On the souls of all of my ancestors and the very foundation of what the coal industry was based on, “The Fly” will have his way with Petrohawk Energy Corporation [[HK]] , much to you oil/gas lovers egregious, and erroneous, chagrin.

Fuck oil stocks. With my newly minted green President in office, I want to sell all oil stocks, until blood drips from the wallets of my friends in the middle east. Just today, I sold the rest of my National-Oilwell Varco, Inc. [[NOV]] . And, I’ve been shorting, mind you, all available shares of Petrohawk Energy Corporation [[HK]] made available to me.

Why pick on Petrohawk Energy Corporation [[HK]] ?

Why the fuck not?

I’ll have you know, my brain aka The PPT, ranks it a 1.74 or strong sell. Good enough for me.

In addition, I want to bulk up on [[DUG]] here, while remaining patient with my long plays, such as BE Aerospace, Inc. [[BEAV]] , [[UYG]] , [[M]] , American Vanguard Corp. [[AVD]] , Citigroup Inc. [[C]] , General Electric Company [[GE]] etc.

The point here is to hedge up and preserve gains, while relishing in the prospect of driving down bullshit oil/gas stocks down 50% or more.

As an aside, “The Fly” is very busy today, so do not bother asking me anything. If any of you felons stone up to ask me a question, I will have your mustaches punched off for you.

Top picks: BE Aerospace, Inc. [[BEAV]] , [[DUG]] , [[EEV]] , [[FXP]] , [[REW]] and short Petrohawk Energy Corporation [[HK]]

UPDATE: I sold short 10,000 [[HK]] @ $17.60

UPDATE II: With all of the buying I am doing into the inverses and short sales, I anticipate my cash position to be less than 30% by the end of the day.

Okay, no more fucking around with elections and shit. You fuckers need to hedge up and avoid murder holes. They’re all around us. Just when you thought the market was lifting off, BAM, in you go and off goes your head.

First thing this morning, I am getting my brain blown out in BE Aerospace, Inc. [[BEAV]] and American Vanguard Corp. [[AVD]] . The problem with AVD, as you know, is liquidity. I am stuck in this fucker, for good or for worse—sort of like being married with kids.

On the bright side, my hedges are working. Right here, I like [[REW]] , [[SDS]] , [[EEV]] , [[FXP]] and short Petrohawk Energy Corporation [[HK]] . Let it be known, I bought REW and FXP on the opening tick. While it’s true, the market will rally into Thanksgiving. It’s also true that stocks like Apple Inc. [[AAPL]] , Hewlett-Packard Company [[HPQ]] and Research In Motion Limited (USA) [[RIMM]] need to trade down a bit. Hence, I bought REW.

On the back of an Obama mandate, I want to sell oil/gas over and over and over. HK is the worst of them all, with a stock price grotesquely overvalued. Weigh into that fucker, as if it just burgalirized your house and urinated on top of your new car.

Finally, on the long side, I still like banks. As a result, I will not sell the rest of my [[UYG]] or Citigroup Inc. [[C]] . Instead, I will look to buy more on dips. And, I still think the homos at [[M]] go higher.

UPDATE: I bought 3,000 [[REW]] @ $96.04. And, I bought 2,000 [[FXP]] @ $78.10

Personally, I think tomorrow’s rally should be faded. However, I’ve been known to change my mind, within seconds of making a strong stand. I’m fucked up like that.

NO MORE POLITICS, by the way. The previous post was intended to let out the pent up frustration. Now, we must all attend to the “The Fly’s” desires to bank more stock market coin.

At any rate, I still say short the shit out of Petrohawk Energy Corporation [[HK]] , as if you were playing with your neighbors 401k. And, get long some [[DUG]] . However, in the event that I am wrong and we rally up, getting our tax hike party on, here are some top rated stocks, courtesy of The PPT:

Overall Top Rated Hybrid:

1 Applied Signal Technology, Inc. (APSG: 17.92 -0.55%) 4.15 4.7 4.4
2 Aceto Corporation (ACET: 8.76 +3.18%) 3.85 4.7 4.24
3 PetMed Express, Inc. (PETS: 17.90 -1.92%) 4.35 4 4.19
4 Boardwalk Pipeline Partners, LP (BWP: 25.50 +0.08%) 4.3 3.95 4.15
5 Odyssey HealthCare, Inc. (ODSY: 10.16 -1.65%) 4.1 4.2 4.15
6 Spartan Stores, Inc. (SPTN: 27.41 +1.67%) 4.15 4.15 4.15
7 Black Box Corporation (BBOX: 31.66 -1.06%) 3.65 4.6 4.08
8 Consolidated Edison, Inc. (ED: 44.53 +2.11%) 3.45 4.8 4.06
9 Oriental Financial Group Inc. (OFG: 16.67 +2.77%) 3.2 5.1 4.06
10 Ka0man Corporation (KAMN: 26.53 +0.11%) 3.5 4.7 4.05

Overall Top Rated Technical

1 Questcor Pharmaceuticals, Inc. (QCOR: 8.86 +6.24%) 4.45 3 3.8
2 SI International, Inc. (SINT: 29.25 +0.93%) 4.4 3 3.77
3 PetMed Express, Inc. (PETS: 17.90 -1.92%) 4.35 4 4.19
4 Boardwalk Pipeline Partners, LP (BWP: 25.50 +0.08%) 4.3 3.95 4.15
5 Applied Signal Technology, Inc. (APSG: 17.92 -0.55%) 4.15 4.7 4.4
6 Emergency Medical Services Corporation (EMS: 36.09 +8.97%) 4.15 3.6 3.9
7 Spartan Stores, Inc. (SPTN: 27.41 +1.67%) 4.15 4.15 4.15
8 (USQ: 8.01 0.00%) 4.15 2.6 3.45
9 Genoptix, Inc. (GXDX: 35.61 +0.94%) 4.1 2.8 3.52
10 Odyssey HealthCare, Inc. (ODSY: 10.16 -1.65%) 4.1 4.2 4.15

Top Ranked ETF’s

1 (IEI: 0.00 N/A) 4.35
2 (CYB: 25.23 +0.48%) 3.8
3 (IEF: 88.76 +1.20%) 3.8
4 (SEA: 12.85 +3.88%) 3.67
5 (SDY: 45.90 +2.46%) 3.6
6 (PLW: 26.85 +1.51%) 3.5
7 (PWND: 11.9199 +11.64%) 3.4
8 (IWR: 66.46 +3.46%) 3.15
9 (MGC: 34.99 +3.95%) 3.15
10 (PPA: 14.69 +3.23%) 3.15

Overall Top Ranked Fundamental

1 Teck Cominco Limited (USA) (TCK: 12.54 +14.63%) 2.55 5.3 3.79
2 Yanzhou Coal Mining Co. (ADR) (YZC: 6.58 +6.99%) 2.5 5.3 3.77
3 Capstead Mortgage Corporation (CMO: 10.43 +4.30%) 2.05 5.2 3.47
4 Companhia Paranaense de Energia (ADR) (ELP: 12.15 +3.93%) 2.05 5.2 3.47
5 Tidewater Inc. (TDW: 45.87 +10.05%) 1.95 5.2 3.41
6 Euroseas Ltd. [[ESEA]] 2.4 5.15 3.64
7 Garmin Ltd. (GRMN: 22.14 +0.41%) 1.7 5.15 3.26
8 McGrath RentCorp (MGRC: 23.50 -0.09%) 2.35 5.15 3.61
9 Turkcell Iletisim Hizmetleri A.S. (ADR) [[TKC]] 2.3 5.15 3.59
10 Arch Capital Group Ltd. (ACGL: 68.35 +0.65%) 2.45 5.1 3.65

The republicans are fucking horse faced asshats. Boy did they blow an opportunity of a lifetime, over the last 8 years. Tonight, I voted against all republicans, in order to punish them for their stupidity.

God willing, within 10 years, there will be no more republicans left in office. I’d like to see every single one of those “horse faced egg fuckers” voted out, then witness their automobiles fall victim to random molotov cocktails.

Why, you ask?

Why the fuck not?

These pricks presided over the biggest financial fuck up, since the Romans sold short gunpowder stocks and went long catapults, in size.

Plus anyway, Obama is the messiah. He will take our taxes and make gold castles with them. He will invade China and force them to wear red turbans, in order to placate our new allies in the Steppes.

Life will be “Obamaesque,” once Obama sits at the head of all tables.

He will kill Wall Street bankers and use their tennis courts to manufacture government cheese and powdered milk. The liberals will have their way, via a filibuster proof Senate, with all sorts of egregious shit. Just in case you are worried and “bible-esque,” fear not. The good Lord is on Obama’s side and will make sure that he (Obama) is able to tax the rich (anyone making more than 20 grand) at an outrageous 70% clip—without debate.

All of you doctor motherfuckers will enjoy 90% pay cuts, under a new egregious healthcare plan.

Howsofuckingever, I look forward to bankrupting doctors and nurses, along with hospitals, in order to teach them a lesson in life. Money is NOT to be made off of other peoples ailments. The Lord will spite those who do so and tax them at very high rates.

Finally, “The Fly” is very much interested in seeing taxes raised and tobacco/oil companies bankrupted, for they do not employ anyone. All they do is employ evil, blood thirsty cancer dealers, who preside from the darkest corners of the Earth, and whose goal in life is to “horsefuck” America into a very bad homeless/dead situation.

God Bless America, sort of.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zuTiTfbfy7Q 450 300]

Obama already won. There is no need for you to vote. With his win, gallantly, he will take your “excess savings,” and send it to homeless people in the streets of Philly. Also, he will take your 401k plans and use it to grease the tracks of his “Obama tanks.”

Do not fight the trend of outright socialism. It is in vogue; everyone is doing it.

Regarding the market:

I am betting the oil sector trades down tomorrow. I bought some [[DUG]] . And, I took down a small short position in that son of a bitch of a whore Petrohawk Energy Corporation [[HK]] . I realize that last sentence is offensive to many of you bible lovers. Too bad.

“The Fly” thou shou [sic] use profuse amounts of cursible [sic] jargon, with great vigor. Blesseth be thy horse cows and may the force be with you.

Amen.

Fly

I sold short 10,000 Petrohawk Energy Corporation [[HK]] @ $18.25. And, I bought 10,000 [[DUG]] @ $35.80.

UPDATE: I bought 1,000 [[EEV]] @ $78.16 and 1,000 [[SDS]] @ $80.25.

So sorry. I could not help myself,

Disclaimer: If you follow the above trades because of this post, the elections will go direly wrong. And, you may lose money.

Let’s just put it on the table, shall we?

“The Fly” nailed the bottom and is smarter than you and your Dad combined. Can we agree on that?

Thanks.

LIBOR is no longer an issue. Now, all we have to worry about are silly fundamentals. However, there is no need to worry about that either, considering earnings season is just about over. Nonetheless, I am holding nearly 65% cash, just in case we get a post election debacle.

If not, one must suck the marrow out of the bones from this market, via egregious commodity plays or beaten down tech. My preference, as you already know, is in Ag—via CNH Global N.V. (ADR) [[CNH]] , American Vanguard Corp. [[AVD]] or Potash Corp./Saskatchewan (USA) [[POT]] .

Let it be known, my fucking traders are the most incompetent imbeciles on Wall Street. These assholes are completely devoid of reason and would bring down any brokerage firm, if given the chance, through their idiotic decision making skills.

And, let it be known, the universe of inverse etf’s are feeling the knife of certain death on their scrawny necks. Indeed, those who are short equities shall feel the wind of my robe and the point of my sword, as the “Imperial Wizard of Equities,” aka “The Fly” mushroom clouds his way up the totem pole (it does not matter that this sentence makes no sense. Be gone!).

“The Fly” is enjoying glorious glory, via outrageous stock market wins. Even my IT guy, Jeremy, is rather perturbed and quite jealous of my victories, for they are without warning or reason. They just happen and it vexes men, who look at fractals in their spare time, to no end.

In closing, I will not buy any inverse etf’s today. Instead, I shall purchase the finest bottle of aged port around and guzzle it down, as if my liver was made from sponges.

Top picks: BE Aerospace, Inc. [[BEAV]] , American Vanguard Corp. [[AVD]] , [[UYG]] , [[M]]