So, for months, I’ve been seeing this “stock robot” trading machine ad, all over the net. From time to time, it would pop up on my blog too; so I bought one.
The “stock trading robot” was delivered in a metal box, about half the size of a coffin. I’m sure my neighbors thought “The Fly” was having dead monkey’s delivered to his house. Very nice.
Fuck them.
After the delivery men left, I opened the mini-coffin and turned the robot on—thinking this ugly fucker was my next meal ticket.
At first, he was just an ordinary robot, with stupid movements and “low-IQ-ish” behavior.
But, I noticed he was picking up on some of my mannerisms, such as asking for coffee, then pouring it into an idle Starbucks cup.
Crazy shit.
After getting familiar with this robot, I decided it was time to see what the fucker could do at the trading desk.
One day, me and this coffee pouring robot stepped into the office, much to everyone else’s chagrin. I introduced the “stock robot” to everyone, declaring: “take a good look at your future replacement.” I even programmed the robot to say cool things, like: “fuck you, you’re dead” and “your Mother is a goat milker.”
He would constantly say that shit. Good times.
So anyway, seeing the robot trade for about a week, I was somewhat unimpressed. I mean, all that fucker would do is buy MVIS, sell short CWTR, then automatically throw something at my trader/servant— every 47 1/2 minutes (I programmed him to do that).
With the amount of money I paid for this fucker, I thought he was going to make me billions. Instead, this shitcan ended up short circuiting himself, via pouring an entire pot of hot hot coffee over his dumb robot head.
A terrible way to die, indeed.
The moral of the story: “stock trading robots”are fucktards and they don’t work. Keep those fucking robots in the factories and out of the trading room.
Trust me.
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I think Tom Brady is a robot.
Perhaps.
moral of story: hey, robots are only as good as the fucktards who program them
so don’t take it out on your robot, fuckface
‘cute’ story
the Fry wins again
in further deveropments; asian robots not coopelating,
yet
Aussie robots are.
Fuck you too.
robots suck
parradium & pratinum down … jj throws himself off bridge
This post is classic. Bravo, fucker fly.
Favorite post of all-time, you must add it to your site for new readers:
http://flyonwallstreet.blogspot.com/2007/09/important-matter-jack-convict.html
Ragin’:
All of my Important Matters are on this site.
Check the front page scroll or Important Matter tag.
Here it is:
http://www.ibankcoin.com/flyblog/index.php/2007/11/10/25/
indeed.
chinamen coming off lows … bear trap, developing
I am having a great feeling about today. Can you say +200?
Fly used the word “chagrin” in a blog post. TAKE A DRINK!
i think bulls’n bears duke it out today with bulls getting late victory like friday
Helly, the FLY:
Long Time No See since you moved into this new big coin bank mansion.
I dropped a bomb shell on Seeking Alpha. What do you think?
JJ,
FSLR to $300
Cajun:
No, FSLR will be dead in a few months. How many people will be reading that SeekingAlpha article, and forward to friend? How many will decide it’s a good idea to hoard some tellurium? A decent individual investor can easily buy one ton. If there are just 10 or 20 in whe whole world deciding to buy tellurium, FSLR will be knocked out of profit margin, and be gone in a year or so.
JJ / Mark Anthony:
1st of all: were you the Mark Anthony that married Cleopatra in a past life & is it true that you proposed with the largest tellurium ring ever, in a (futile) attempt to corner the market & ensure a profitable future short position in FSLR?
2nd: You’re too smart for your own good. You have the brain virus, shortcircuitus which causes one to come up with worthless investment theories that sound airtight on paper and seem to ensure ones dream of 60-100 folds return on investment. Then this virus causes tunnel vision & forces all facts to conform to its theory and blinds one to the big picture.
In short: FSLR to 300, before 100. SWC to 5 before 13 & PAL to 2 before 8.
Suggestion: Get laid.
Wow, that’s some crazy shit, JJ. I woke up this morning and there were 5 messages on my “stock trading phone’s” answering machine, all of them somewhat breathless asking me if I had read the “important” article on Seeking Alpha about FSLR.
This may be the best idea ever, shorting the strongest stock in a weak market. You’re short from what, $120, $130?
Meanwhile, how’s that SWC working out?
In short JJ, you should learn how to swing a hammer or rake leaves, because if you follow through with your trading “ideas” you’ll be poor soon. However, I somehow think that it’s that type of suggestion that feeds your belief that you’re “the next Warren Buffett.” You probably call yourself a contrarian.
-DT
Hot hot coffee lives on!
Meanwhile, it’s interesting that JJ pops up on a post about “stock trading robots.”
Good stuff, Fly, thanks!
-DT
DT: egg-zacktly! re: JJ pooping up on this t-robot thread
you can’t make this stuff up
SHOES
Orlando Magic wins again. I could care less about the NBA but its a free doughnut at Dunkin’ Donuts’ for every win. I am eating a chocolate glazed one now.
I’m still looking for a t-day rally … we’ll come off these lows & have a good close , imo
bear rally only … jack be nimble, jack be quick because jack is gonna get his balls lit come 2008
2008 spx target = 1150
So, light trading day and I’m thinking…should I book my BOOM profits, or hold for the “Red Suit Rally?”
I’m up about 180k from Oct 22nd. Do I push for more coin, or do I take the money and run?
big undertow out there … big rip
Let the rally begin with me!
http://www.michigansuits.com/images/Michigan_T_Red_Camera.jpg
i got one word for y’all : Word O’D-day
==========> TELLURIUM
how do you spell that JJ?
P A I N
thats right smartass … PAIN !
git used to it
Send in the special agents!
http://www.flightsuits.com/images/info/stp.jpg
JJ what’s your max pain on FSLR?
I believe!
http://images.icnetwork.co.uk/upl/icliverpool/feb2003/5/0/00013D96-9445-1E5B-A0A680BFB6FA0000.jpg
The Fly sends The Fly a secret message viz red suit:
http://home.swipnet.se/popmart/images/bono.jpg
I’ve got palladium in my pants! We need a rally!
http://media.collegepublisher.com/media/paper144/stills/4iiqza32.jpg
Can I spoke the Red Man Rally peace pipe? Look, this is how I’ll do it:
http://www.manilowsmodems.com/news2004janeredJPG.jpg
http://www.mtv.com/shared/media/news/images/m/Mudvayne/sq-mudvayne-veins-red-suits-02-press-epc.jpg
WE WOULD LIKE A RALLY OR WE WILL STEAL YOUR SOUL.
In the spirit of Red Suits
I’m daytrading SMH,AMAT,INTC, and Q’s here for a long. I’ll be out soon if no turnaround.
This post was pretty dam funny.
I couldn’t understand some parts of this article The Important Matter of Stock Trading Robots, but I guess I just need to check some more resources regarding this, because it sounds interesting.
red suit your a douche bag. Juice now thats a nice red suit.
fuck it.
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Make peace, not war!
Thanks for sharing
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I’d prefer reading in my native language, because my knowledge of your languange is no so well.
We will burn that bridge when we come to it.–Nick Gorski
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