18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,482 Blog Posts

The Bulls Are in a Figure Four Leg Lock

When “The Fly” was young, he always tried to apply the “figure four leg lock” on his friends, but had zero success. Frankly, I think wrestling was lying about that too. That shit doesn’t hurt.

Nonetheless, it sounds ominous and the bulls are in a tough spot today, with soft GDP numbers and weak employment data.

As you know, in an amazing twist of events, just yesterday “The Fly” aka “Senor Tropicana” was ready to throw in the towel—right at the top of the range. However, after a few shots of espresso and some “talking to” he regained his financial manhood and towed the line.

With regards to today’s trading:

Things look bleak, with massive losses in [[TMA]] and a variety of bank stocks—with notable exceptions to [[FNM]] and [[FRE]]. As you know, both Fannie and Freddie are operating flawlessly— combined losing more than 6 billion over the last 3 months. Well done.

Within the DOW, [[GM]], [[AIG]] and [[JPM]] are underperforming.

And, let’s not forget about my bagel dilemma, which seems to be affecting the shares of [[BAGL]].

On the bright side, energy stocks look ok, with nice gains in [[EOG]] and [[RRC]]. [[WNR]] posted a ridiculously bad set of numbers—giving new meaning to their ticker symbol annunciation.

Finally, shares of [[AAPL]] are on the rise, due to positive guidance at a Goldman Sachs conference yesterday. And, [[S]] is gapped lower on horrendous quarterly results and elimination of their stupid dividend.

All in all, it looks like a good day to be long [[GLD]], [[UDN]], [[SKF]] and [[SRS]].

NOTE: Go check out Gunners’ post on [[VNO]]. Great stuff.

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It looks like someone has a small margin call of 300 MILLION. No problems. 300 million in space cadet money is equal to 1 “vanillian” space dollars, which as you know is very “doable.”

Perhaps my theory that some “corn cob fuckers” were propping up the banks, in order to prepare them to absorb bad news was true?

CNBC loses again.

NOTE: [[TMA]] only has the “good mortgages,” right Charlie?

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CNBC is a Whore

Come now. How can the producers of CNBC allow their reach and influence be continuously abused by people with an agenda? I mean, how many fucking leaks of the pending monoline deal will they facilitate?

It’s obvious and evident, the underwriters are attempting to prop up shares of [[ABK]], in order to price an offering. This is all very manipulative, is if you ask me.

Within my client base, I have many people in the audit business. From what I can tell you, anticipate significant disclosures of bad credit exposure, within the next two weeks.

From what I hear, Goldman Sachs will not give quotes on some of their illiquid CDO’s, without the third party buying an instrument. In other words, the auditor’s are scratching their heads, trying to value the toxic crap, within the banks’ books. They [auditors) are very nervous, with memories of Andersen Consulting Arthur Andersen fresh in their minds.

Finally, the market, yet again, managed to finish green. Understand there is a concerted effort to reflate equity values, in order to absorb bad news.

With my money, I love Vestas Wind Systems, which trades on the LSE—ticker symbol VWDRY.pk. Buy it and forget it.

And, I will continue to nibble at [[GFI]], for a long term hold.

UPDATE: Homes in Detroit selling for almost zero! Take that Dennis Kneale.

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UPDATED: Bears Waiting For a Charlie Horse

UPDATE: Charlie Meatballs’ daily “fuck you, you’re dead” report was benign.

In other news, that Wisdom Tree commercial, regarding their Indian ETF, is starting to get on my fucking nerves.

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Fly Buy’s: FXP, UDN, GFI

I bought 3,000 [[FXP]] @ $81.50, 1,000 [[UDN]] @ $28.50 and 5,000 [[GFI]] @ $14.40.

Disclaimer: If you buy the above stocks, you too will become a mirror of the market trend. And, you may lose money.

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I’m Betting Against Myself

As you know, in my previous rant, I declared the “death of the bear market,” thanks to the amazing losses at [[FNM]].

However, it’s worth noting, thus far I’ve done little to act upon such sage advice. As a matter of fact, I’ve initiated a trading position, going short the dollar, via [[UDN]].

Keep in mind, “The Fly” is much, much smarter than you and the market. Therefore, he wins, a lot.

So, in essence, I’ve done nothing more than talk shit, hoping that my words would serve as a contrarian indicator, enabling me to win—in real life. A very tricky, yet intricate, plan indeed.

Nonetheless, I intend to bank profuse amounts of coin, through misdirection and mixed messages, via buying a selling a variety of ridiculous instruments.

You might be saying to yourself: “What the fuck is this asshole talking about”?

To you, I reply: “Exactly, watch me execute ‘magic tricks,’ right in front of your face.”

With my money, I’ve decided to open up a variety of positions, namely [[UDN]], [[GFI]] and [[FXP]].

On the day, I’m down less than $1,000 or 0.00001%

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The Bear Market is Over, For Now

So sorry to inform you, at this late juncture, but the retardedly gay bear market we’ve kind of enjoyed is officially over, much to my chagrin.

[[FNM]] loses 3.6 billion for the quarter, yet the stock rips higher on an egregious decision to let them fuck up even more.

No matter what the news is, good, bad or indifferent, the market rips higher.

So, until we see clear signs of a breakdown, I will no longer throw good money after bad, trying to benefit from some sort of cataclysmic event. It’s not happening.

After all, we’ve got a myriad of problems, yet the market does not care. I’m not interested in your fucking conspiracy theories or opinions as to why we are gapping higher everyday. All I care about is where my stocks are trading. For the most part, all of my longs are melting up, while my shorts melt away.

While it’s true this could be a great entry point on some shorts, I see no evidence to suggest sentiment will change, anytime soon. Without a doubt, the market will go lower, eventually, just not now.

My initial approach will not be rushed. I will not cover all of my shorts, right away. Instead, I will immediately increase my long positions, in order to hedge against my overweighted shorts. Then, as price permits, I will scale out of some of my more unsavory short bets, and reallocate the assets accordingly.

My long positions will increase my exposure to the energy creation market and select basic resource plays, and commodities.

More on this later.

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