Oh Shit, We’re in a Bear Market?

You fucking clowns are simply vomiting on yourselves right now, long in the tooth, following a classic bear market rally. What did you think, we’d go up forever?

As discussed early this morning, “The Fly” nailed the top in the oils, selling his ERX into the fervor and buying ERY into the fire. As a result, he (“The Fly”) is now roaming around his office, fully robed, egregiously sandaled.

My largest position, FAZ, is sprinting higher, as well as my other inverse etf’s, namely SRS. My feelings, as always, is to murder all of the bulls, stuff them in a back of a caddy, then bury them somewhere upstate NY—goodfella’ style.

See folks, life is not about being herded with dumb people then winning. Life is all about taking the high ground, then mechanically sniping fucktards who are traveling in the herd below.

Top picks: FAZ, ERY, UNH

Here is a clip of the CEO of JPM, Jamie Dimon, demonstrating to officials at the Treasury what he will do with TARP funds. Truly enlightening.

I bought 5,000 ERY, sub $35.

Disclaimer: If you buy ERY because of this post, in the year of the pig, menacing armies from the east will afflict irreversible damage to your nations treasury, amidst the black smoke, you will choke. And, you may lose money.

I sold 20,000 TNA, north of $31.

The banks are not having a bad day. Instead, they are having a horrendous day, with out sized losses in WFC, JPM, MS, USB and most of the REITS. As you know, my largest position is FAZ, which is deep in the red, following last weeks torture melt. However, it’s only a matter of time before our favorite banks start warning and raising capital again.

Some pacific coast banks that should trade lower, include: PACW, WABC, ZION, EWBC and PCBC. I would throw FED in there, but that fucker is already $2 bucks.

In the short term, the market is going to follow the money. If desperate hedge fund managers want to jack up the market, in order to “save their year,” they will. Eventually, the masses will come to their senses and bid down stocks, much to the chagrin of pigeon brained asset managers, like Bill Miller.

Today’s theme is “fuck the dollar,” with t-bills selling off to boot. In the short term, money flowing out of t-bills is great for stocks. However, looking down the road, if we see the dollar continue to weaken, coupled with yields going up in t-bills, that can be seen as a vote of no confidence from other governments to fund our deficit. That is something to look for, down the road.

Oil is sprinting here. Without the outperformance in oil stocks, today would be a bear parade. There is abundant weakness in a variety of sectors, particularly in the banks. If you are 100% short this market, your fucking brains must be swollen by now, with all the mindless rallies this market is producing.

After this mornings data, coupled with earnings warnings, you’d think we “clown dive” a little bit and begin a new leg down. No. The Magic Jack lovers are here to save the day. They have their nets and they are willing to buy any stock, no matter how bad the news is.

Sometime soon, my guess, research houses will downgrade oil/gar stocks, based upon reality. The reality is: oil/gas are fucking inexpensive. Thus, with cheap oil/gas, stocks like XOM or CVX are expensive. Taking a gander at some of the oil/gas names, you’d think oil was at $150 again.

Unreal.

Sometime today, I will sell me ERX position and buy ERY.

Shout out to the neocons who spit on dollars. Apparently, the dollar is going down the sewer drain, again. If so, I do not view this as an opportunity to go long commodities, just gold. In my opinion, gold can sprint higher on dollar death, while oil and corn will suck wind, thanks to demand destruction.

More on this later.

Why do you little bitches put cream or sugar in your coffee? What the fuck is wrong with you? Aside from being bitched out, weakened from taking in all the modern day media, when it comes to coffee make a stand, for the love of animal instincts, and drink it black, no milk, no sugar.

Much to my chagrin, standing in line at my local Starbucks, I felt like punching out of the Adam’s apple of the guy in front of me, who ordered a “Grande Latte Machiato” or some shit, with a certain homo’s out tone to his voice. My order, as always, “a large cup of black coffee.” Should that fucker put sugar in my cup, I’d jump over the counter and beat him senseless with a coffee pot.

Just saying.

As for the markets:

I am not making or losing money in this tape, which is annoying. However, if I was not hedged to the upside, I would have gotten my fucking brains splattered all over Wall Street, long FXP, EEV and FAZ. Sometime soon, I am telling you now, the market will turn upside down on its head and “clown dive” to new lows.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2J8q1tX1q0k&feature=channel_page 450 300]

This is truly fascinating. As evidenced by the leadership in foreign markets, investors/stupid hedge fund managers are pricing in a resurgence of the U.S. consumer and the global infrastructure boom, via bidding up basic resources and domestic retail equities.

It’s a bold call, considering we are in the early stages of the down cycle. Even when U.S. markets are down, Asian equities are higher, due to the assumption that a U.S. consumer driven recovery is on the way.

There is no other way to dice it.

In case you were wondering, the following stocks are major beneficiaries of the return of global growth:

XOM, CVX, APA, OXY, CEO, MOS, POT, CLF, RIO, BHP, SLB, BHI, NOV, ASTE, LNN, BUCY, CAT, TEX, EME, SGR, PCR, FLR, FWLT, INT, ACM, INSU, GVA and finally DRYS, GNK, TBSI and EXM.

Now, I am not giving you a portfolio recommendation for late 2006, mind you. Whether the market is right or wrong, the above stocks are where its at.

As you can see, this is a very powerful move. There is a concerted effort to bid these names up, for whatever reason, and it can last for quite awhile. Based upon past numbers, all of the basic resource names are dirt cheap. However, unfortunately, forward looking numbers do not leave much to be desired.

Bottom line: I will take profits on longs, when I can, and use cash to make long side trades. And, as much as I want to short everything in sight, I will respect the current market forces and refrain from making any big downside bets.

Use patience to kill the momentum.

UPDATE: I bought 10,000 CBL @ $5.76.