Fly Buys: CPX, HERO, TSO

I bought 2,000 Complete Production Services, Inc. [[CPX]] @ $8.58, 3,000 Hercules Offshore, Inc. [[HERO]] @ $4.57 and 10,000 Tesoro Corporation [[TSO]] @ $13.20.

Disclaimer: If you buy the above stocks because of this post, your local Chinese restaurant will begin spitting in your food. And, you may lose money.

A great man once said: “When in doubt, go eat a sandwich.” Those magical words still hold true today, despite all the advances in modern technology.

You need to exhibit patience, while attempting to become a “space alien magician.” There will be lots of pops and drops, most of which will be headfakes—designed to bankrupt you and steal your wife and kids. With the market up this morning, I intend to do the same thing I did yesterday: nothing. While some of the ADD type find this sort of behavior reprehensible, I declare: trading all day long is boring.

Stop having a boring life; stop having a boring tuna.

With a little luck and a lot of dry ice, I am hoping for a “rig-killer” in the Gulf of Mexico this summer. I want to see Geraldo Rivera and Shepherd Smith hanging horizontal, as a “Deacon of Death,” barrels through the region. With that in mind, it’s time for you to get your hurricane game on, starting with a small [[UNG]] position.

At the moment, my top picks are Huntington Bancshares Incorporated [[HBAN]] , [[ENTR]] and General Cable Corporation [[BGC]]

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KJ9pl4sKC3c 616 500]

The evil, progress minded, bulls were defeated today, amidst heavy selling in the banks and CRE names. The dark forces of Goldman Sachs Group, Inc. [[GS]] , Lloyds TSB Group plc (ADR) [[LYG]] and SL Green Realty Corp. [[SLG]] were tossed into garbage dumps, thanks in large part to more sellers than buyers—a fascinating paradigm.

I am sure the charts spell doom for the retail investor, who inadvertently, are being “nose grabbed” by low-level series 7 hacks.

“The Fly” took a few uppercuts to the scrotum today. However, the damage inflicted upon my “ball sets” was only half as bad as what the 100% long crowd received today. With that in mind, I am the fuck out of here.

Hordes of Armageddon loving misfits are scurrying up and down Wall Street today, in hopes of a near term market top. After all, President O’bama is a communist and America is stupid. Deep down, everyone is rooting for China to conquer the U.S. and enslave all of the fat guys, in order to “solve” the burgeoning unemployment problem. On a very personal level, I’d like to physically detach the entire state of California (save Danny), sending it right into China’s brand new shiny Naval fleet—effectively killing two birds with one stone.

All of the good news, recently bestowed upon your face, will be ripped off soon—like a Brazilian waxing.

Believe you me, there are some stocks going higher, even in today’s tape. However, I am not into that sort of thing. Instead of storing my dough in boring stocks, like PepsiCo, Inc. [[PEP]] or The Coca-Cola Company [[KO]] , I rather hold cash and live to kill another day. If you are interested in some sort of hand holding, during times of duress, you’ve come to the wrong place. Go buy a stuffed animal and eat a chocolate bar in the shower, if you are into that sort of pussified behavior.

So, what are we going to talk about? The market is going lower and I am not shorting stocks. Maybe I can give you fuckers real time updates on the condition of my cash. You know, I can let you bastards know if any of the bills get creased or torn— or update you of any minuscule money market rate changes.

“The Fly” is into that sort of thing, during the latter months of the summer. While sipping, NEVER GUZZLING, on a 50/50 blend of iced-T lemonade, I bowl on you—despite not even being in the bowling alley, if you know what I mean (you most certainly do not).

Go buy yourself a $100 tomato and let me know how your common stock portfolios are doing. I eagerly await rejecting all of your pesky requests!!

Ciao

Don Fly

I know most of you trade like ADD addled pansies hopped up on energy soda; but “The Fly” does not cater to you. He will not up the frequency of his trades just to placate the cigar wielding OTB guy who scours this site for ideas.

Early last week, I warned you to raise cash, yet you did nothing.

“The Fly” is playing this dip by not playing it. I have close to a 50% cash position and could care less what the market does today. I will not initiate any short sales out of pure unadulterated fear that the Goldman tradebots will cut my balls off.

As for my current positions:

At the moment, I am comfortable riding out this storm, in exchange for a sandwich or two.

Let this be 1:25am warning to all of you homegamers: raise cash now, else get ready to feel the full brunt of Wall Street, just waking up from months of unchecked— cocaine infused— partying, hung the fuck over, just looking to sell shit, as if their brains were fried from bad tabs of acid.

Before I leave, I want to share a few thoughts, regarding the recent run in commodities. Despite tepid demand, commodity prices keep going higher, with sugar at 26 years highs and copper at an egregious 10 month peak. Oil is above $70, despite a severe global downturn, which begs the question: is somebody trying to sell me a $100 tomato?

Look at this fuckery:

It’s almost as if, THE POWERS THAT BE, got sidetracked by some bullshit credit crisis. Frantically, they worked to eliminate the risk to the system, in order to sell me a $100 tomato. I will say this: “The Fly” will take your $100 tomato and smash it in your face. He will siphon gasoline from police cars and dump it into the Harlem River, while on one of his “late night drives.”

From Freeport-McMoRan Copper & Gold Inc. [[FCX]] to Alpha Natural Resources, Inc. [[ANR]] to United States Steel Corporation [[X]] to The Mosaic Company [[MOS]] , we are in the midst of another commodity bull run. If you say it’s because of China, I will knock your mustache off.

It has nothing to do with China, dipshits.

All I have to say, in closing: beware of the $100 tomato, for you will not be eating it. Instead, it will be eating you.

Goodnight (crazy man unable to discern the correct time of day send off).

“The Fly” has lots of little, pesky errands to run today, so he will not be around to enjoy the market sell-off. Do not fear the sell-off, instead, embrace it. I warned you horse faces to raise cash and chill the fuck out. If you are getting “tea bagged” by today’s action, you have only yourself to blame. I know, it’s not fun watching the market rip through gains, like a stubborn cat through your collection of stuffed animals.

For me, it’s the same retarded stock, Flotek Industries, Inc. [[FTK]] , that plagues me with losses. To be honest, sometime I feel like a “Simple Jack,” long that stock.

Don’t be surprised if a group of coked out bulls, backed by some Goldman robots, pared today’s losses in half, or more. Every time the market dips, someone is there to catch it. I don’t see any reason why that should not happen today.

Into weakness, I like Starent Networks Corp. [[STAR]] , Huntington Bancshares Incorporated [[HBAN]] and [[ENTR]]