Ate a Sandwich Instead

I have the staying power of a fucking horse on large doses of viagra. I got over my morning hissy fit and decided to “stay the course,” vis a vis not selling out of [[TLT]] . The way I figure, I’ve traveled all this way to see a giant elephant jump off a diving board into a swimming pool, sans the water. God dammit, I will see that elephant massacre himself if it’s the last thing I do! Or, maybe I will just forget about the elephant and go hunting for gay giraffes.

I decided to shuffle the deck chairs instead, via selling out of General Cable Corporation [[BGC]] and Brocade Communications Systems, Inc. [[BRCD]] —both at a profit. And, adding to Flotek Industries, Inc. [[FTK]] and TriQuint Semiconductor [[TQNT]] positions, while initiating a new one in Johnson Controls, Inc. [[JCI]] .

Today was a “fanfabulous” day, with stocks skinning bears alive and climbing to new nonsensical levels. It’s worth noting, however, [[SRS]] behaved rather well, which is why I decided to keep it for another day or three. Let’s call it like it is, we’re all guessers, some guess better than others. You have your idiot charts, while I have my EPS estimates and robotic algorithms. At the end of the day, we are all subject to the whims and personality disorders of people like Bob Doll and Bill Gross.

I bought 50,000 Johnson Controls, Inc. [[JCI]] , north of $33, 10,000 Flotek Industries, Inc. [[FTK]] @ $1.60 and 10,000 TriQuint Semiconductor [[TQNT]] @ $7.95.

Disclaimer: If you buy the above stocks because of this post, you will find out, much later on, that the financial system was all a sham. A big fucking joke on the blue collar piker. And, you may lose money.

I sold out of General Cable Corporation [[BGC]] , north of $30.50.

UPDATE: I sold out BRCD, north of $6.50

All of the shit that you are doing now, I’ve already done. You think the market looks great and all of your little fucking stocks are awesome? Fuck you, I’ve been there and done that. While you are over there, sucking the pants off of some bullshit 4 letter stock, I am over here with a heart full of disdain, blogging away like the wind. Do not raise an eyebrow to Senor Tropicana when he says “it’s time to move on.” You have not earned the right to offer advice, nor will you ever.

See, pal, making money in a bull market is easy. Try banking coin when the tenants in your building are taking self inflicted howitzer shots to the face, on their lunch breaks, because the market stole their nest egg. For the record, I did not sell any [[TLT]] yet. However, if I chose to do so, well, that would be my fucking decision, wouldn’t it? Moreover, and let me make this 100% crystal clear for you: I’m not your fucking financial advisor. Fuck off and call the hacks from Merrill if you need someone to tell you nighttime stories and tuck your pathetic ass in at night.

What I do here, on this blog, is actually none of your concern. Sometimes I wish my blogs were written in invisible text, so that only I may read them.

This is my situation:

More than 60% of my assets are either in cash or treasuries and have not lost any value since they’ve been parked there.

10% of my assets are placed inside of a retard boat, [[VXX]] , getting hit with electric shock grenades on a daily basis.

30% of my assets are at all-time highs, invested in more than a dozen different equities.

All in all, my gains are about 15%, year to date. My choices are to be stubborn and wait for “my market” to magically appear. Or, I can just carry on with my life, throw some money back in the market and keep it on a very short leash.

The bottom line is this: my assets are at all-time motherfucking highs, coming off of a +90% 2009 and +60% 2008. Shame on you and your house for your sins. Shame.

Okay, I am about to say “fuck off” to my large [[TLT]] position. At this level, I am mildly profitable. If I sold here, essentially, I wasted 1 month of my life waiting for some retarded deflationary vortex to take hold, all for nothing. Oh, fucking, well.

Look for the Greeks to rape themselves, late April through May. They need to issue a shit load of paper and I seriously doubt it will attract a lot of demand. I mean, the short dated stuff (1 year) is being issued with 6% yields! Compared to German paper of 1%, it will take great Spartan courage to pull off some large long dated issuance.

The trucking industry is humming again, as evidenced by Cummins Inc. [[CMI]] , Titan International, Inc. [[TWI]] and a multitude of parts makers. I will look to edge into Titan International, Inc. [[TWI]] , at my earliest convenience.

Also, the chemical industry is smoking hot, all to do with foreign demand. Stocks like Cytec Industries Inc. [[CYT]] and Lubrizol Corporation [[LZ]] will fucking smash numbers this quarter, in my humble opinion of course.

Finally, I want to buy stocks with big cash positions that have lagged. One such name is Novatel Wireless, Inc. [[NVTL]] . Another such name is “go fuck yourself, do your own research, pal.”

In short, there are shortages in semiconductors, forcing prices up–enabling retards to bank coin in semis, all the while I sit here in Treasuries. I am 100% aware of the amount of skill and knowledge that is being wasted here.

Developing…

P.S. Bernanke is a bearded clam.

The market run up is being fueled by loose cash and wrong-headed shorts. We are in a perpetual state of short squeeze, where every day means the death and “whoring out” of a bearshitters ultra-asshole portfolio. In my estimation, it always makes sense to scour for new potential squeezes that might bring grave harm and cataclysmic, irreversible capital losses to those who make a living betting on America’s demise.

Naturally, the best way for a person such as myself to find such names is by using the most powerful analytic engine on the internets, The PPT.

The following 10 names (top 10 lists are all of the rage, always have been) are stocks that just got flagged “buy” for improving price action, with exceptional short positions. Any stubborn move higher in said names can result in a most dreadful and egregious short squeeze drama, all to be aired live here on iBankCoin.

Screen Criteria
(% of shares sold short above 15%, technical score of 3.00-3.50 out of a possible 5)

Flotek Industries, Inc. [[FTK]] GTx, Inc. [[GTXI]] Scholastic Corporation [[SCHL]] XenoPort, Inc. [[XNPT]] Builders FirstSource, Inc. [[BLDR]] Overseas Shipholding Group Inc. [[OSG]] Briggs & Stratton Corporation [[BGG]] GameStop Corp. [[GME]] [[PLCE]] Saks Incorporated [[SKS]]

As I slowly take on the hated persona of a burlap wearing bearshitter, I am reminded of the days when investing in stocks had risk. Back in the old days, stock fluctuated between gains and losses, prior to making decisive moves. Today, we have an “MNCS” market to the upside, for no reason other than momentum. The dollar isn’t going down anymore and the economy is not ripping to the upside. We are simply chasing momentum.

Well, while we are here, enjoying the decadent scenery of winship, we might as well play along, until the bomb hits and ruins our view. On strength, I like TriQuint Semiconductor [[TQNT]] , General Cable Corporation [[BGC]] and chemical play Sigma-Aldrich Corporation [[SIAL]] .

Just so you know, I’ve decided to air one new Fly cartoon show per week. Like HBO, “The Fly” needs to adhere to strict schedules, in order to maintain internal discipline. So, if you are interested in part IV, tune in at 8:00pm, Sunday night.

After a mild/tepid dip, the asshole dip buyers have gobbled up the losses and turned the market green, not so different than Rapunzal turning her hair into gold. We have lift off in a number of CRE names, effectively bringing immediate losses to my fresh out the box [[SRS]] position. Like I said, one way or another, I will sell it tomorrow.

My little Flotek Industries, Inc. [[FTK]] is showing signs of life and [[CBD]] is dipping here. I might add to my [[CBD]] position here, or perhaps one or two points lower.

Finally, let it be no surprise to any of you that [[TLT]] is higher, yet again. Despite strange Chinese men harassing Senor Tropicana on Twitter, long bonds continue to hold its value, AND MORE. Nevertheless, as much as I like to make fun of everyone for hating on bonds, I can’t stay in this bullshit for too much longer. It’s turning my once exciting life into one of a moribund nature.

Top picks: TriQuint Semiconductor [[TQNT]] , Flotek Industries, Inc. [[FTK]]

As we enter earnings season, I will bet you donuts to doorknobs investors severely punish companies that miss earnings expectations, in the most egregious way. Remember, while you smirk at your screen, feeling all good about yourself and shit, the market is entering “guillotine season” with lots of exposed neck, if you know what I mean. While it’s true, I’ve been far too conservative during the recent move higher. It’s also true, there have been numerous times when I have been far too aggressive. Everything balances out, sort of, in the end.

Okay, so going into earnings, I strongly suggest under weighting bank stocks, especially the regionals. Even though I am short CRE, via [[SRS]] , I expect most CRE names to beat expectations. Within tech, there is no denying the cycle is ridiculously beneficial to the majority of semis and networkers. However, just know, China is greatly decreasing funding for 3g network roll out, to the tune of 20+%. I’d avoid names like [[ERIC]] and Alcatel-Lucent (ADR) [[ALU]] , as if they were the black plague.

If I was to bet on one sector blowing away numbers, it would be the chemicals. If you are so inclined, get long a basket and turn the monitor off.

For the most part, earnings will be good, across the board; but will they be good enough?

The Fly Meets DevilDog’s assistant, part 1

The Fly Meets DevilDog’s assistant, part 2

The Fly Meets DevilDog’s assistant, part 3

UPDATE: A sneak preview at the meeting with a Mr. Devil Dog (I am done with these vids, for at least a few days. Too busy).