IT’S TIME THAT YOU’D RECOGNIZE MY ZEAL

All of you come here wanting stock picks. If not here, you venture off to Chess, RC, OA, Caine, Raul or some other person hiding in our midst (no gorillas). You demand that we make you money in return for your base ingratitude. At the very least, the lot of you should be knocking on your neighbors doors, demanding that they read the site. I didn’t start this blogging experiment for no good reason. There was a distinct foul smell of talentless rabble permeating throughout the financial web when I started and it still exists.

I like to peruse Business insider; but those guys do not offer advice, merely stories about hookers and hedge fund managers.

You can try your luck on Twitter, hoping to hop onto someone’s back, praying to the Lord that they are responsible stewards of money. But the truth of the matter is, Twitter is nothing more than a nomadic experiment in incompetence waiting to be proved out.

There is only one, singular, site on all of the internets that does it all: offering sage advice, by extremely talented managers, not to mention prose that is fit for the Ny Times best sellers list. And that is iBankCoin.com.

I tell you this because you need to be reminded. I remind you because you need to be told.

That is all. You may proceed to roast marshmallows over your stove top, like a gluttonous pig.

Silver +27%
Gold +18%
3-D +17%
Biotech +11.5%
Computer peripherals +10.5%
Home Healthcare +10.3%

How many computer peripherals/home healthcare stocks are you privy to?

More on this later.

Worst performing sectors

Marijuana -13%
Nuclear -6%
Processing systems and products -5.6%
Food-Major diversified -4%
Beverages–wineries and distilleries -2%

NOTE: Chinese burritos generally outperform in the month of July, historically.

Data provided by the glorious and exalted robotic think tank of The PPT

I am bored of the stock market and have decided to call it a day. The rest of you may spin your wheels to your heart’s desire, trading in and out of soon to be defunct biotech names. As for me, I am going to eat a protein bar and do a few dozen chin-ups.

Either way you slice it, it was a good week, despite RUBI taking a dump out. I had been up more than 10% on the position and now I am flat. It sucks how that happens. But this is the profession of men, a job designed to destroy the weak and aggrandize the brave. I am not scared to hold onto names that others discard, unless of course they threaten my very existence (see Four Horsemen of Financial Ruin).

I have a plan and it’s aggressive. Then again, I’ve never been one to shy away from a bit of panicked anarchy, a time bomb hidden inside of a birthday cake that I intend to eat. Sure, every so often, the cake will detonate and I will lose a limb, or three. But I’ll always come back, to the same place, to eat the same cake. It’s who I am. Now who the hell are you?

I’ve been allocating a portion of dollars, mainly new money, into a 5 year program, built around 5 stocks: OZM, SLCA, CHK, GILD and BID.

And finally, I really like this PE, as oil prices fix to crush the Americans with Iranian submission holds. Any successful e&p company is worth investing in, especially with oil upwards of $105.

Have a great weekend.

If The Option Addict tried to pick a bad stock, he couldn’t. You good folks should go mosey on down to his bloggeries, for it is on fire.

As for me, I realize I’ve been checking in late into blogging work as of late. Please do not fire me, sir, my poor dog lost three of his legs and I had to sow sew them back on.

I’ve come here today to discuss one singular topic. I am not going to discuss the merits of TSL, RBCN or even RUBI.

I’VE COME TO DISCUSS THE MERITS OF IFON.

Granted, it is a micro-cap stocks, stuck in the sewers of man. But it is a real company. As a point in fact, it is a verykool company.

Here’s the latest snippet from last quarter’s earnings:

“We are pleased to report a third consecutive quarter of profitability,” said Joseph Ram, president and CEO of InfoSonics. “Sales in the first quarter grew 49% over the same quarter last year, gross profit grew 50% and operating expenses declined by 6%. Unit shipments during the quarter rose 51% compared to the prior year. Most importantly, we reported a large swing in profitability by turning a $709,000 loss in the first quarter of 2013 into a $55,000 profit in the first quarter of 2014. Also significant, in late March we secured a $2 million bank line of credit that will provide future liquidity, together with the arrangement of $4 million of credit insurance that will enable our manufacturing vendors to extend credit to us that was not previously available.

Trading less than 1x sales, growing revenues in excess of 50% per annum and profitable, I’d say IFON is one hell of a cheap micro-cap. But what do they do? That’s the best part of the story.

Based in the decadent confines of San Diego, USA, Infosonics travels deep into the jungles of the Amazon to sell them “Ifons”. As a point in fact, they sell them “VERYKOOL” ifons. Persons of South American origin: I demand that you acquire these ifons, not just so that I might benefit from an explosion in share price, but for society as a whole. You do not need rotary phones any longer and public pay phones are demeaning. Get yourself a Verykool phone and everyone will think you are, umm, very cool.

NOTE: At the time of this post, Le Fly owned close to a million shares (extra Dr. Evil)

All of you wretched people were praying for the worst, hoping Le Fly would capitulate, check himself into a nice rubber padded room, and live out the rest of his days fashioned a vagabond. Little did you know, the great misfortune that afflicted me in early 2014 was nothing more, or less, as an opportunity to display my vast arsenal of skills.

The time is fast approaching when you shall pay for your sins. The very prayers that you set forth shall come back to you at a factor of 1,000. The only suitable punishment is death by fire, in order to cleanse your soul, so that the Lord might allow you into his Kingdom. Otherwise, you are assuredly going to roast in red hell.

As for me, I pressed forward again, buying this or that, playing games in the stock exchange. You know where I stand, directly inside of the victory circle.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=QOxK04TYkgY#t=530

I swapped out of CDE (5% gain) for new issue oil play PE, sub $24.

I like it to $30.

Parsley for the win.

It has the distinct smell of ursine. As the masses obsessed over the second coming of World War 2, with USA v Germany soccer action, the market asserted itself, led by a wide pastiche of high beta chinese lottery gambling degenerate stocks, the sort of things one buys for his grandmother–on margin.

Over this period of time, “The Fly’s” winnings have expanded, encroaching on what I like to call “a day of sheer, unadulterated, winshippery.” Now you have every right, as a man and member of the society of humans, to bet against the tape or wallow in a miserable cash position. But I am telling you here and now, as sure as I am sitting on this chesterfield couch typing away: this market is about to wheel in the penis guillotine into the city square for swift and immediate action against enemies of the state.

To be short is the same as being a terrorist and you shall become wardens of the state.

Pay for your sins now and get long, get very long, else face the consequences of your inbred driven actions.

Gentlemen, we’re back inside of the meat grinder, the sort of sordid market where everyone loses. Thank the heavens that I am not part of your occult clan, as I have skipped the meat grinder line, in favour of the beer and pretzel one. The majority of my top holdings are up, see, so I really don’t have much in common with you.

I believe CJES was acquired by NBR; but now the stock is down. I don’t even want to look at the news, for it makes my brain hurt.

What’s important to know is the melt up in chinese burrito lotto stocks is real. I believe that is TEDU approaching 14 dorrars now, is it not?

On Jupiter’s Stone, both LEJU and TSL are heading much higher. I’d also like RUBI to recover. However, we cannot get what we want, when we want it, how we want it, all the time. The truth of the market is, we are enduring a phase of consolidation. The only sector that appears to be immune to the trials and tribulations of the fribble-minded investor is gold, which is why I haven’t taken profits on CDE.

Top picks: LEJU, TSL, RUBI

You can stop shorting stocks now. You’d be all the wiser for it.

A weaker economy means the Fed will slow down the tapering. I realize many of you insist to believe the economy is doomed and unsustainable, and all of the other things taught at Tea Party rallies, by people with junior high school reading credentials. But here is what is really going on, unvarnished and without subjectivity.

The stock market is the economy, literally.

During the crisis of 2008-2009, the government learned that if the stock market goes, so does the country.

The Fed will support the economy, through the stock market forever.

The Fed would appreciate it if the bond market could function without them. Hence, they are ‘tapering.’

If, by chance, the stock market should go down more than 5% in a short period of time, the Fed will pay attention.

If, by chance, the stock market should go down more than 10% in a short period of time, the Fed will intervene.

 

There you have it. Taper or no taper: the Fed is the buyer of last resort, the proverbial bid in this market, forever. Arguing against these facts and taking long term bearish positions is a waste of time, since you and I both know that the game is rigged. The most dangerous games to play are the ones that are unfair. If you insist on playing it, you could at least side with the rig-er and not the rigee.

I was up 0.82% today.

Added a little to LEJU. It’s very thin, so be careful.