I’m not sure why men grow beards in the summer. I sort get a winter beard, men larping around like fucking lumberjacks wearing flannel shirts and pretending to be rugged whilst sipping on their chestnut lattes. But a beard in the summer should be illegal. You should be arrested and forced to shave it off in shame in front of the youth, to set an example.
You can’t just go walking around eating food into this face full of hair, getting grease all over it. Some of you fuckers even place oils on it, because you’re filthy animals and need something to take away the itch. Pro tip: if your face itches, that’s God’s way of telling you to SHAVE OFF THE FUCKING BEARD.
If you think about it, by defying God you might go to hell for a fashion statement. Also, women don’t like beards you fucking idiots and it doesn’t make you look tougher. Some men think they’re more imposing with this mass of hair on their face but it just makes them look like disgusting filth, particularly in the summer.
Get some barbasol shaving cream and have a nice clean shave with a safety razor and then apply some aftershave and then go kiss your wives. She’s thank you for it and you can thank me later you pigs.
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