iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,599 Blog Posts

Some Clarifications May In Fact Be Needed

Last week I toiled extremely hard removing by hand my lawn to both reseed and resoil it. I poured endless streams of high quality manure and top soil onto the barren lands, myself covered in it for all the neighbors to bear witness to. They’d visit me after golfing and preside over me as I wrangled thick roots from beneath the red clay and marvel at my stubborness. I had planned this for 6 months. I bought all of the tools and materials necessary to complete it, even employed Mrs Fly to help in this Great War against the weeds.

Three days ago I completed the project, seeded over it and then began to make sure the lawn was properly hydrated twice per day.

Fast forward to today: torrential rains have poured down into it, without let up, creating a morass of mud and ruin. All steepened areas of the lawn are now stripped of seed, puddles everywhere: DOOM.

The market is very much like my lawn. After the rain stops, I’ll head back out there to seed again. See I have endless amounts of seed and enough money and willpower to make sure the grass will grow again. I will wait out the cold, the climate, and my own personal injuries. But rest assured, that fucking grass will grow.

If you enjoy the content at iBankCoin, please follow us on Twitter

4 comments

  1. bensteinsmoney

    Hear … Hear!

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  2. bensteinsmoney

    Speaking of home maintenance & rain – I have had a carpenter (weekend warrior) coming since July for multiple projects (mainly holes in siding from a horny woodpecker) but all he’s been able to do is cancel due to illness or rain (hurricane this weekend) for the past 3 months!

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  3. duuude

    Gotta be a tiny ass lawn

    Took three guys and heavy machinery three weeks here, moved trees, brought in 15 boulders.

    Fuck hay btw

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  4. soupbone

    Up here, sods work well. Must be a sod farm nearby.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"