THE FLY BREAKS HIS TRADING SLUMP — HERE’S HOW

Good day —

Markets are soaring today and me with it. My gains are electric, +255bps in trading, +300bps in my longer term. I can discuss how I pick stocks — but that would be rote and seeing everything up like it is today — it is not rocket science to understand that I possess gains now with a fully long unhedged book.

The question is how did I come to keep a fully long book and break the disastrous slump? I will tell you now.

Since late July I began to grow a beard. I never keep a beard because I feel that men who don’t shave are slobs. But since I was on my 6th Civil War book and took a liking to Stonewall Fucking Jackson, I let facial hair grow. This was of course a mistake. I also had been trading in my library, which is fine — but I believe it ran out of luck.

Two days ago I shaved my fucking face clean and began trading in my living room. The results cannot be refuted.

Many of you small brained fucked for faces doubt the power of change on the psyche — but it is indeed real and the metaphysical cannot and will not be fully understood. My chart needs to constantly keep soaring from left to right and in times when I am heading lower or static — I feel somber — sad even. I of course have very high expectations for myself — especially since I am so special and unique, deserving even of the very best market returns possible.