iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
19,850 Blog Posts

Today’s Bounty; Stepping Aside With Some Cash in Hand

Last night I was “moderating” on WallStreetBets, the popular sub-reddit for finance, when all of a sudden a SALTY MOTHERFUCKER came upon me and started to fuck with my divine powers. The other mods were all like jealous little bitches that Dr. Fly was amongst them, being a Divine God with Supreme Commander medals upon his person. This one chap STRIPPED ME and subjugated all of my comments to their fag-box to rot in hell. This comes after yours truly just cemented a viral post, extracting information from another autistic retard who took $3k and leveraged it to $1.7m.

This of course could not and would not stand.

So I did what any reasonable and rationale man would do — take to Twitter and press my case with the founder. He recommended I write this mod a “strongly worded letter” — which I already had done.

Shortly thereafter, my powers were restored, the faggot who stripped me put into his place, Le Fly reigns supreme once again.

Now that I got the childish antics out of the way, I can tell you what I did today.

BAM! slaps 5 fish onto your fucking desk.

TVIX +3.3%
(NEWR -5%)
PODD +3.2%
CYBR +11%
COHR +1.2%

No big deal. I was in the hole in PODD — they came out and smashed earnings and now I’m profitable. CYBR smashed and NEWR fucked over. All in all, a fine bounty.

If you enjoy the content at iBankCoin, please follow us on Twitter

3 comments

  1. spaceman

    I am so excited for my metals right now have you seen how firm and erect they are??? Now I need to get out my credit card and that adult website and continue to help the erection!

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  2. richardweiner

    For all the people who think The Fly is tough guy, just remember in real life he is a just tiny Gook. I love the smell of napalm in the morning Charlie.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"

Leave a Reply