Markets Might Be Bottoming Out Here — But Stops Still Need to Be Respected

Today I bought SOXL and I’m down a fast $12. I was forced to sell BL and EB — because they breached my 10% loss threshold. I also sold BLRX for a 40% profit — because the catalyst no longer exists. I sold BAND, fortunately, for a 5.2% gain. And, lastly, I sold WK — for breakeven, just because I no longer desired to hold a second tier name.

All of this culminated to raising 30% cash, in an account that is built like an automated fucking machine — designed for pleasure and, dare I say, ejaculatory wins. Because of this indelible fact, I am often reminded of the occasions when I pressed down hard on the gas into similar tapes and was shredded and cracked asunder, cock chopped off and head used to be punched by midgets in clown uniforms. For the love of all that is mighty and just, I am Le Fly and my mission here is to outstrip and to crush and to definitively out-man those in my realm, an exalted manner passed on thru the generations — a bloodline that is both violent and wise — filled with rampant alcoholism, murderers, and genius.

I stand before you a man of extreme confidence — placed into this situation to tell you that we are, in fact, oversold, according to the intelligence from Exodus — on a historical basis — dating back to 2009. What this means for you, the unwashed laymen, is that this is a ***RARE EVENT**, one that was last enjoyed on 4/2/18 and produced an immediate shock to the upside in markets. Whether or not history repeats itself is entirely immaterial. I step into the arena, filled with bravery and verve, because it is the only way I know how to behave. My losses are reminders of my discipline and my gains my eloquence. You’re reading this now — most likely because you’re unsure. Markets are testing your mettle and you lack the gumption, or, dare I say, the eternal fortitude to cast a light upon the darkness, leaving you in an oblique state of disarray. Do not fear, Le Fly is here, immortal in both body and spirit, presiding over you in a most charitable way.