iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,551 Blog Posts

Here Are 10 Reasons Why I Ban Readers

Ladies and Gentlemen, I am pleased to report that iBC has banned over 2,000 readers since the site was launched in 2007. I do this, for a variety of reasons, mostly to quench a personal thirst of digital slaughter that I’ve been afflicted with since I was a young adult.

There are two tiers of banship. The first is prohibition from commenting, which is lifted, 9 out of 10 times, after the reader emails me for respite. The most severe is FULL IP BAN from ever accessing the site again. Upon visiting the site, you will be redirected to this page, then redirected again to the Greg Solomon re-education camp. I’ve found that people who dislike Mr. Solomon are miscreants. Therefore, this video is ample punishment.

I ban people for the following reasons:

1. They are losers. Losers will not be tolerated in these halls.
2. They are stupid.
3. They are dressed poorly.
4. Their behavior is unbecoming of a gentleman.
5. Their commentary is childlike. Children are not permitted on these grounds.
6. Random rage assault. Sometimes I just blow of some steam by banning you.
7. Their stock picks are pathetic.
8. They spam the comments section with drivel.
9. They dislike Benjamin Bernanke.
10. They question my pimp hand. That, my friends, will not be tolerated.

These are the ground rules. If you want to become a better investor, learning from true professionals, shut your mouths and watch your manners.

Good day.

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29 comments

  1. Acehood

    11. They wear shorts?

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  2. Acehood

    Oh i see, that’d be 3a.

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  3. bobbin4apples

    What if they are Canadian?

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  4. ripper

    12. IP lookup shows they are from Ohio.

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  5. TraderCadddy

    Sounds a little like what I was told when I caddied.
    Show up, keep up, and shut up.

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  6. TraderCaddy

    13. They like to ride a Ducati.

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  7. randomness

    14. Writers should learn to not split infinitives. <<<—-har har.

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  8. flyaway18

    I got banned once and was sent to re-education camp, it changes your perspective on appropriate commenting for sure lol.

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  9. Yabollox

    Are people under indictment banned?

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  10. BRAVEFLAPS

    Rage banned!

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  11. Option Addict

    Rather than IP ban my miscreant readers, I am going to start my own video blog where viewers can watch as I track down where the miserable fuck lives, surprise visit him in his mothers basement, then drag him into the street and beat him in the dust.

    Sensitive topic for me.

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    • lol

      Hahahahhahaaa oh my.

      I’d be more interested in spyware that video records his trades so we can take the other side every single time…. Hahahaha

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  12. fake amish

    Senor Fly do you find the bear market in corn as a LNN negative? The company is a water play but the broke farmer could be a problem. Nothing like drought and the demise of corn to double fuck tractor collectors.

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    • fake amish

      Looking to get long. LNN has been a dog this year but has not followed the price of corn perfectly.

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      • jbran

        Corn is not an irrigated crop.

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        • gatorsun

          10-4….lol look at ANDE

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        • The Fly

          QED

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        • Dat Wikipedia

          In 2010, the maize planted area for all purposes in the US was estimated at 35 million hectares (87.9 million acres),[47] following an increasing trend since 2008.[48] About 14% of the harvested corn area is irrigated.

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        • fake amish

          Corn being irrigated has nothing to do with the wall street mindset. Corn down ag equipment stocks down. Let alone the fact that farmers farm many crops. Out in civilized cali almost all corn is irrigated. Only the Midwest still prays for rain like peasants.

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  13. Voice of Reason

    I admire iBankCoin’s persecution of the weak as much as the next guy. But I think Fly goes a bridge too far with the random, unprovoked bannings. Who died and made him judge, jury, and executioner?

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  14. Fidel Cash Grow

    I die every time I watch the beginning of that video. He is the funniest man alive

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  15. J

    I love the banning and the discussions. It’s the best part of the site other than the stock talk

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  16. Jeff Goldblum

    Upon review of your reasons to ban people shouldn’t you ban yourself?

    Good luck banning me after you get out of your moms basement.

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  17. Steve W.

    Please present thy ring for me to kiss.
    Oh yea, one more thing, please never, ever mention $FRO again. It’s down 5% today, and it always reminds me of the movie Car Wash (1976) and I am forced to come to terms with the fact that I am not ‘daddy rich’. Sob…sob…whimper.

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