iBankCoin

African Masks, Bow Ties and Black Flags

Today’s tape is scaring the shit out of short sellers, so I figured it was my duty to lend to the anxiety. I just got back from Wall Street, where I startled piker brokers with my African mask and multiple bow ties. That’s right, Jim Rogers doesn’t have shit on me. “The Fly” wears multiple bow ties, when dressed to impress. The whole African mask thing is something I took from my sons art project. It is scary as shit and makes stock brokers panic by the sheer sight of it.

I received a text message this morning from some guy who has like $25 in his account with me. It read: “please get me an allocation of GM’s ipo. I will wire you the money immediately.” My response, as you could imagine: “go fuck yourself.”

See folks, clients are not special. They’re just people who think they are special. In reality, they are assholes, just like you. I make it a point to let people know how insignificant they really are, with regards to my personal life. I do not need their business, nor do I really want it. It’s a job, not so much different than picking up trash or mopping hot tar on a roof. My job is to make lots of money for people and take a cut of said money, so that I can finance projects designed to undermine the fabric of society.

We’re going gangbusters here, folks. We are in a LONG ONLY market, where shorting leaves you dead in the street, sans African mask. I like retail, going into Black Friday. Names like LIZ, PSUN, ANN and THQI interest me. I’m also interested in pressing the shorts in FTK. You know those fuckers are squirming, hoping the pain will stop. They figure the stock is up huge and it needs to rest a little.

WRONG.

There will be no respite, nor safe quarter—just African masks, bow ties and black flags.

NOTE: December seasonality screens are up in The PPT. Very interesting data.

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45 comments

  1. FIG

    BTW, Fly. WFR is in a terrible industry. Solar has been taken over by the Chinks. They have cut prices to the bone, and therefore margins are toast. I have a suspicion that WFR is simply getting fucked with the rest of the sector.

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    • The Fly

      First of all, cut out the racism.

      Second of all, I am fully aware of their desire to produce poly-silicon. If you haven’t noticed. WFR is down quite a bit in recent months.

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    • panamaorange

      The Chinese bought the sun, in order to heat their vast vats of KFC chicken.
      Its not like it was doing anything important.

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  2. Frank White

    GM hah. Oh dear i wouldnt want to buy 100 shares at 34.15 i must must have them at 33…..

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  3. DarkMatter

    Discordant tones:

    Long VXX
    Sell VXX

    Muni market crashing.
    Buy FAZ. Sell FAZ

    Long Retail.

    Looks like we need to buckle up.

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    • DarkMatter

      By the way, you didn’t get enough credit for calling the Oil top earlier this week. Anyone who followed your SCO trade idea has benefited handsomely.

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  4. mrkcbill

    GM SHMEEM
    GIVE ME MY MOTHERFUCKING COOKING OIL!!!

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  5. TraderCaddy

    Still have 40 minutes.
    What will happen if GM trades below $33?

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  6. xochi

    I truly appreciate you, Senor Tropicana. Your imagery is so fun and decidedly weird, in the best way.

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  7. TraderCaddy

    Ha Ha.
    Tell the guy you can get him theGlobe.com and Webvan.

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  8. Trading_Nymph

    lol, about bow ties, China hasn’t given details at all about how they are going to “Control” prices…this rally is a bit silly. Here is my issue, Will China take care of China and screw the World…or will they let Chinese Poor starve and freeze this winter. My bet is that China will Party like 2..0..0..8…but that is just me.

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  9. joe

    ” clients are not special. They’re just people who think they are special. In reality, they are assholes, just like you.”

    ” My job is to make lots of money for people and take a cut of said money, so that I can finance projects designed to undermine the fabric of society”

    How fucking priceless is that?:)

    TZA puts being really nice to me today…I am not worth it! Well, considering competition, I guess I am:)

    Dow has got another 300 points in it for this run and than…1000 points down. I will be betting on it. But for now, I am holding on to my $13 tza puts and I intent to switch the gains (and than some) into tna puts in a day or two-early next week.

    I am going to call the end of the week for now ( vancouver BC ladies watch out…I am having all three of you). So, have a good weekend everybody except for the cocksuckers,…you know who you are! I will be thinking of you when every limb in my body is inserted inside the best females money can buy:)
    Life is fucking GRAND!

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  10. drummerboy

    crazy as it seems as i type this while listening to your jam pick.good tune at festives time.almost has a christmas y type feel. da chillens like it.

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  11. Skynet

    What a finish!!! Fuck yes –

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  12. Bullish

    That was a funny post!

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  13. xxxHuggieBearxxx

    Today saved my ass. I have literally been fighting a bloody hand-to-hand battle against the market all week. I found myself long crude futures into the maw of the selloff, which was no place to be.

    Thank god for today’s massive reversal. It hath bestowed upon me redemption and, barring any tomfoolery, i shall leave this week profitable.

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  14. panamaorange

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wcW_Ygs6hm0

    Last known footage of the poster known as “redrocket”

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  15. go2mars

    Project proposal for undermining the fabric of society seeks financier ($8-10 million required with chance for return on investment):

    Buy tunnelling equipment, create very large carvern within a competent rock unit (thinking limestone in the Rocky Mountains), seal it with air lock, buy large compressors for vacuum and refridgeration. Re-create atmospheric composition of Mars (temperature, pressure, composition, light levels, approximate surface materials) and run it as a research facility for extreme condition technologies (very cold, very low pressures, high CO2, etc.). CO2 can be purchased for cheap by the semi-truck load from oilfield suppliers. Have an area with a glass window where lots of school kids can look in and observe rovers, pressure suits, and other cool shit. Set it up so if safety breaches occur (people’s suits depressurize) then the atmosphere can be quickly brought in by opening the airlock immediately.

    How does this undermine the fabric of current society? Takes kids from watching sluts on MTV, takes a break from their civics indoctrination classes at school, and gets them interested in truly macro-scale, challenging projects involving innovation and ambition. Provides an accessible environment for corporations and governments to test equipment (adjustable facitlity). Even boot makers might want to brag about their results or film commercials/movies here. Not to mention materials sciences, testing arctic drilling equipment, etc. Chance for partnership with universities, research institutions, government grants, sponsorship from Discovery channel, etc. Plus, the gift shop and cafeteria could help keep the lights on if it came to it. Research done thereby will support the eventual bases and programs that operate on the surface of the planet Mars, which in turn kick-starts the ambition and imagination of kids even further, leading to a revolution where people become engineers instead of hairdressers, and come up with practical ideas which benefit all of mankind (from water recycling systems to the next green revolution). The place could be mostly run by volunteers (the Mars Society has lots of old duffers who would get hot for such an idea).

    What do I want out of it? Cover my current salary for 3.5 years and give me a 5% stake in any eventual profits. Any takers?

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  16. With a vengeance

    I had to dispatch one of my customers the other day. He texted me back essentially saying he would bad mouth everywhere possible. My initial thought was,
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AuUqpZgHiEE&feature=related
    but I refrained.
    He was not worth another neural synapse. Huh, what customer?

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  17. GOBBLE GOBBLE

    Long only, pleuse.

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  18. alphadawgg

    Fly,

    This looks like your handiwork….

    http://i.imgur.com/EA4fk.png

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  19. GonzoTrader

    Insiders have been buying the fuck out of PSUN

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  20. softbatch26

    Fly: Your three blog posts today, pure gold. Does mcsweeney’s know about you?

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  21. noodle

    FLY, any tips on getting people to give me money to buy shit with?
    •thx•

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  22. Redrocket

    You are wrong. Get short as a motha fucka.

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  23. Dr Genius

    The solar industry does not have a place in our society in the long run, except for the tree huggers.

    Personally, we should let the Chinese waste their resources on solar bs while we allocate our money toward nuclear fission and fussion in the future.

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  24. Goldie

    Well I got short today… Fuck it!

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