iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,460 Blog Posts

Diet Soda Caused the Credit Crisis

As I obsess over the Important Matter of Sugar, I came across this gem, which boldly states that “reducing the degree of fluctuation in blood glucose may offer a possible means for the treatment and intervention of some impulsive disorders, anorexia, drug addiction, and gambling addiction.”

Furthermore, they suggest that (normal) people who drink real soda, as opposed to that shit with cancer in it, tend to think longer term. The people drinking the cancer soda get all bent out of shape and demand less money RIGHT NOW!, while regular fatties prefer more of it later.

beverages

Fascinating stuff. Without a doubt, the sugar hunt continues.

The results indicate that when we have more energy available (that is, higher levels of blood glucose), we tend to be more future-oriented. The authors note that “the future is more abstract than the present and thus may require more energy to process. Blood glucose as brain fuel would strengthen effortful cognitive processing for future events.” Conversely, having low energy (or low blood glucose levels) may make an individual focus more on the present. The finding that a diet soda drink increased the degree of future discounting suggests that artificial sweeteners may alarm the body of imminent caloric crisis, leading to increased impulsivity.

I dare to say: the credit crisis, and all of the bad decisions that were made leading up to it, were a direct result of the increase of substitute sugars! Prove me wrong.

CAVEAT:
Sugar intake may cause you to think “longer term” because it makes you mentally ill. ROFL. Damned if you do, damned if you don’t.

“sugar consumption triggers a cascade of chemical reactions in the body that promote chronic inflammation. In the long term, inflammation disrupts the normal functioning of the immune system and wreaks havoc on your brain”


BREAKING NEWS UPDATE
: Cocoa is also at a 7 month low, [[NIB]] . WTF! Is this a The Hershey Company [[HSY]] , Tootsie Roll Industries, Inc. [[TR]] conspiracy? Great, now I have to obsess on cocoa too. I’ll be up all night.

nib

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48 comments

  1. Rand

    Interesting!

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  2. KY

    Go long KO to save the world!!

    Fly, dry bulk shippers will blow up this year. GET LONG

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  3. jg

    fig

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  4. RaginCajun

    YES! BEST TITLE OF THE YEAR.

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  5. The Fly

    I nailed the Credit Crisis because I was drinking sugary products. However, I am now mentally ill. LOL.

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    • Dr.

      I concur

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    • Sugarobsession101
      Sugarobsession101

      Ur on the roll tonight. Mentally ill sugar substitute guzzling fools….. priceless! I don’t think the White House’s “organic” garden is growing any sugar this year. Last year, Bama threw his ciggy in the garden and it burn’t to shreds. True story…… lol

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    • mhass33

      Hahaha sums up the situation quite well. Excellent work Fly, truly excellent.

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  6. Gbest

    same happened to Mick Jagger and Keith Richards, that’s why they did not do much in the 90’s, they took on another venture due to much soda on tour
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zkD6bjia0bY

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  7. Sugarobsession101
    Sugarobsession101

    Alright Fly your getting crazy with the entire sugar drama. You now even have me researching it. I am disturbed by this. I went to eat Thai tonight and as I was drinking my sweet tea the entire time I was acknowledging the fact that I was sipping on pure sugar instead of the cancer packets that are in shades of blue, pink or yellow. Real sugar is not bad for you, nor is real meat or real cheese. Real meaning organic of course. It is the processed shit and the freaking preservatives that are injected into our foods that shamefully make the petrified Michael Jackson look like a spring chicken. I do recall a McDonald’s commercial I heard over a year ago….. Now serving real chicken! Shit, what were they selling before? Fake chicken? Chickens mainlined with sweeteners, hormones and crack….. Alright, I am done with the sugar issue now.

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  8. The_Real_Hmmm

    Cities may start imposing a soda tax (treu story). That’s how the government will regulate credit expansion!

    I just got back from a Finger Lakes 5-day wine tour. Aside from getting drunker than a California house wife, I had ice wines with 20% residual sugar. As a result I have no urge to buy stocks. Odd, no?

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  9. The_Real_Hmmm

    What else does “The Kellogg Group” own and what do they do? Developing…

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  10. The Fly

    don’t forget GIS and KFT

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  11. Drewdog

    Fly,

    This resembles one of your charts!!

    http://chart.ly/29zt4h

    lol…

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  12. DPeezy

    In 2001, I bought a Diet Coke by accident out of a vending machine. I drank that shit and haven’t looked back since!

    Fuck you calories/sugar/HFCS! I’ll take cancer over mental illness. (Considering that _everyone_ in my family has gone by the way of out-of-control cell growth, I don’t think it will make much of a difference.)

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    • The Fly

      i bet you want stuff and you want it RIGHT NOW!

      It’s people like you who caused the credit crisis.

      Fuck you and your vending machine epiphany, back in 2001.

      (heading towards time machine, destination asshole vending machine, 2001, missiles armed)

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      • DPeezy

        Some have epiphanies around urinals; I have them at vending machines.
        Don’t hate.

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  13. JakeGint

    I am supporting the 100% prime cocoa market by downing massive bags of Ghiradelli 60% purity cocoa drops.

    With vino, of course, for double the good health effect.

    _________________

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    • The_Real_Hmmm

      Try Valrhona, it’s very good. I recommend Vosges for adventurous creations.

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      • JakeGint

        I only buy chocolates produced in Nancy Pelosi’s district.

        Red vino too.

        ______

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        • Dani

          ROTFLMAO…….. Nancy Pelosi’s four basic food groups: Chocolate ice cream, chocolate ice cream, chocolate ice cream, and chocolate ice cream…….. Perhaps sugar is directly related to the mentally ill cause lord knows she be saying some whacked out shit

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          • JakeGint

            Reminds me of one of my kids favourites, Will Ferrell’s Elf where he explains the four basic food groups of elves:

            1 ) Candy
            2) Candy Corn
            3) Candy Canes
            4) Maple syrup

            ___________

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          • JakeGint

            (one more from that movie… I think the Gimbel’s Santa was played by Artie Lange of the Howard Stern show… perfect casting):

            ——————————————————————————–

            Buddy: Who the heck are you?
            Gimbel’s Santa: What are you talkin’ about? I’m Santa Claus.
            Buddy: No, you’re not.
            Gimbel’s Santa: Uh, why of course I am! Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho.
            Buddy: Well, if you’re Santa, what song did I sing for you on your birthday this year?
            Gimbel’s Santa: Um, Happy Birthday of course. Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho. How old are you son?
            Kid with Santa: Four.
            Gimbel’s Santa: You’re a big boy. What’s your name?
            Kid with Santa: Paul.
            Gimbel’s Santa: Now what can I get you for Christmas?
            Buddy: Don’t tell him what you want, he’s a liar.
            Gimbel’s Santa: Let the kid talk.
            Buddy: You disgust me! How can you live with yourself?
            Gimbel’s Santa: Just cool it, Zippy.
            Buddy: You sit on a throne of lies. (ROFL! — .ed)
            Gimbel’s Santa: Look, I’m not kiddin’.
            Buddy: You’re a fake.
            Gimbel’s Santa: I’m a fake?
            Buddy: Yes!
            Gimbel’s Santa: How’d you like to be dead, huh? Ho, ho, just kidding.
            Buddy: You stink.
            Gimbel’s Santa: I think you’re gonna have a good Christmas, all right.
            Buddy: You smell like beef and cheese, you don’t smell like Santa.

            ______

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  14. The_Real_Hmmm

    I got it. Pork bellies and feeder cattle futures have been rising over the past few months. The government is arbing American citizens! They’re going weight neutral. McBeal the fat fucks and McMeal the skinny fruits. Something tells me this guy won’t be eating banana chips and sipping on bee pollen smoothies anytime soon. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZfbTO0GlONU

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  15. YaBollox

    If you can’t make money on stocks, try commodities? Is that where this is headed?

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  16. chivo

    A lot of people comment on Steve Nash’s ability to play like such a young man at such an old age. Steve Nash said he doesn’t eat sugar. Ever.

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  17. KY

    Financials holding up

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  18. KY

    Financials holding up

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  19. buzzkiller

    Disprove you, hah. You have not proved your point so attacking it cant be done. You found one table of well known facts that some 2 bit researcher leached funds to study.

    There are many variables that affect the production and sales prices of sugar cane. To fully understand would be impossible.

    Those that follow TA will know better than to search out reasons, and just trade the price. Those that follow FA will deceive themselves. How do I know? Corn syrup is what is in most drinks in the US market, not cane. So chart is meaningless.

    How else? We have had increased production of Plano Texas like “retro” beverages that have sugar instead of corn syrup, so use of sugar is likely increasing. Anyone having their head stuck up FA can rationalize this by saying increased demand for corn products changes the supply/demand curves for similar products.

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  20. Steve Place

    If you’ve got an hour and a half to burn, watch “Sugar: The Bitter Truth”

    It provides evidence (actual science!) that the consumption of fructose is a major factor in heart disease, type II diabetes, and other metabolic problems.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dBnniua6-oM

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  21. zerobeta

    What about booger sugar?

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  22. Elder Beer Man

    For what it is worth, annual per capita consumption of various beverages
    in the USA (average gallons per year per person) is approximately:

    Beer 75 gallons Soft Drinks 55 gallons Coffee 25 gallons.

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    • JakeGint

      Thank the gods that beer is still winning.

      I think I remember reading something about wine in Europe and the discrepencies were even larger…

      __________

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  23. TheArtist

    all the problems created in the past30 years can be traced back to Saccharin……..hahaha…

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    • JakeGint

      Just got this this morning, but it’s appropriate to the conversation:

      For those of you who watch what you eat, here’s the final word on nutrition and health. It’s a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting nutritional studies:

      1. The Japanese eat very little fat
      And suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

      2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat
      And suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

      3. The Chinese drink very little red wine And suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

      4 The Italians drink a lot of red wine And suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

      5. The Germans drink a lot of beers and eat lots of sausages and fats And suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

      CONCLUSION…..
      Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you.

      __________

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  24. TheArtist

    and don’t forget the “old school” pixy stix……whooah…..

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