NOTE: This was intended to be posted last week. However, as you now know, The Turkey Gods were interrupted by debt junkies from the Middle East. At any rate, here it is, unedited.
Gentleman, the Turkey Gods are here and they bring gifts of perverse language, through a space alien magician conduit.
The market trading above 10,500, on the eve of the Turkey Gods, is not an accident. Gentleman, it is by design.
I warned you cocksuckers not to fuck with me. I told you the warm tales of Turkey Gods and how they control stock prices, with their ferocious cranberry encrusted beaks and gravy covered claws, over and over again. I exclaimed with ferocious tenacity: “The Fly wins all the time, The Fly Wins all the time, blah, blah, blah,” but you chose to disbelieve my dire warnings and pearls of enlightenment, in exchange for pure goat fuckery. As a result, you ventured off like a homo in the perfume section at Macy’s, to lesser websites, hosted by men in bow ties, who told you “America sucks (dick).” On that advice, you took your entire life savings and bet against the awesome criminals in dark suits, via large amounts of [[FAZ]] in your pathetic IRA accounts.
Guess what, fuckface?
Now you’re just dead. You’re not laughing anymore, mainly because you are fucking dead. Donuts to doorknobs, your market prowess is a drag on America’s economic recovery. I bid you farewell.
I’ve been winning for a little more than 10 fucking years now. With grace and dignity, like a gentleman with a pipe, I come here to iBankCoin in an effort to show goodwill by sharing my market experiences— literally helping the stupid people make a little coin in this diabolical world. What do I get in return? I get a guy, a poorly dressed fat guy if I might say so, coming to this web address telling me his “opinions” regarding the market. ROFL!! (3 exclamation marks is a sign of insanity, not 2!!)
HELLO!! Anyone home? How hilarious is that?
Your opinions mean nothing to me, AND MORE. I don’t give two fucks and a gay mule about anything. I am “The Fly” and I will slap you in the face with a sizzling slice of pizza without warning. This is my fucking website. Like it or not, you are going to have to live with that harsh reality.
What are we talking about here?
Gentlemen, we are talking about winship—winning in business, at home, in the street or even in dreams/nightmares.
Separately, a great man once said: “fuck those firemen.” I could not agree more. All firemen really do is hang around their stupid little clubhouses, cooking gourmet food all day long—metrosexual style. How often does a building burn down, really? The most noble occupation in America, by far, is asset management. Forget about public servants. They are nothing more than “Government Bitches.” When discussing asset management, we are talking about a job that requires vast skill sets, courage and tenacity, the sort of thing this great nation was founded on. When done properly, asset managers improve the quality of life for just about everyone out there, by creating enough capital gains to fund great national projects, stemming from bank bailouts to “reversing global warming.” On this Thanksgiving, remember to give thanks and praise to people, like Le Fly, that make America great.
In closing, you should not have bet against me. God willing, you have learned, yet another, valuable lesson and will never question my market hand again, sans the whole Flotek Industries, Inc. [[FTK]] situation. Nonetheless, something tells me you little trollops are full of shit and are plotting against me, as I write this essay. My internet life is a never ending struggle, similar to the super hero-villain relationship, only gayer.
But in the end, “The Fly” will always win.
Happy Thanksgiving.
[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cH-K3MU7-fA 616 500] If you enjoy the content at iBankCoin, please follow us on Twitter
fig
Boom, head shot. Fly wins again.
fig
I would like pepperoni on that pizza!!!
This is possibly the greatest post of all time.
Fly is The BlogFather!!!
Is the “great man” Matt Damon from The Departed?
No. Grandpa Fly.
Funny, Damon concurs:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IL1TI90AOkQ
your condescending shtick is old
it never gets old, from my vantage point. You just feel like yourself.
i’m not tired of it yet, but I’m a simpleton and dumas…
It’s not old. Don’t even look at his comment. It’s old already.
It’s “condescension schtick” btw, and it’s well respected in the literary pantheon.
Martin Amis wrote an entire book (“Money”) in that voice. Great ending.
_____
1. Review your grammar. The usage of “condescending” is correct.
2. Well respected in the literary pantheon? That’s plainly nonsense and the very idea that Le Fly’s “work” will ever make it into any kind of literary pantheon suggests that you should blow your brains out with at least a .270 or larger caliber hunting rifle like right now.
Nice post Master Fly.
I didn’t think we would hit 10,500 but I never bet against you 🙂
Amen
Hear, Hear!! May the turkey gods provide another round of WINSHIP to all of the gentlemen and ladies of the PPT!
great insight shit lips….I long for the days of great post from …ah shut up
With the overuse of the word “fuck”, you no longer sound as clever as you, indeed, are.
Way to go fly on your prediction the Dow hitting 10,500
this morning before the bell it was questionable, however you were right.
I think you should give yourself the title
the warrior instead of the fly.
I knew we’d hit 10500 today.
My iPod touch has made taking a shit 1000% more fun. That is all.
Hmmm… my son has one of those… now I’m worried.
_______
Worry if he brings it in the shower in a ziplock bag
I think we should GOLD plate your iPod touch….just to distinguish you from some of the other “bloggers” with less quality breeding.
If you are not Knighted or the Fly I forbid you to read this post any further…..go ahead look away.
Hey guy’s how HOT is that chicks ass on my blog?
LOL.
_______
I meant what I said on your blog…
I couldn’t agree more… I’ll send it to the V.Kingdom foundry post haste.
Your moniker reminds me of a place i used to work for growing up on Long Island. We used to call it Stupid People’s Beach Club (among other things.) Minus the $2 tips for carrying 800 chairs every day and my 7 ft. behemoth boss who, on a good day, would scream, “What is this? Fucking Romper fucking Room? You’re all fucking fired,” it was the best job i ever had.
The chix made up for all that extraneous nonsense.
____
Now that we’ve had both premature and mature ejaculations, it’s time to go down to the local pawn shop window and raise dollahs like it’s “Bread Monday” in Zimbabwe.
__________
And truly, do not open your ears to those who lie to you saying that you will be cursed if you do not believe
in gods and tin gods or in liberators (angels) and demons and venerable ones (holy ones), because all of them
are only unsubstantial fabulations (inventions) of those who are confused and of all those who want to beat
you down into servitude (bondage) and exploit you through your belief; and therefore their lies are also hazy
pictures (delusions), as are shared by their believers and the priests of gods and tin gods and of other servants
of gods and servants of tin gods; and do not open your ears to those who lie to you that you will be cursed if
you do not believe in priests and other servants (hands/helpers) of mistaken beliefs and gods and tin gods, and
also if you do not believe in people of your kind (human beings) who raised themselves up as godheads or as
authorised ones (substitutes) of gods and tin gods and demons.
😀 😉 8)
Note to Comcast:
Upon your completion of purchase of NBC,
please act immediately on the “cleaning up” of the dead weight on you newly acquired shit hole so called financial channel CNBC.
First, fire at once:
Dennis Kneale, the Asshat in residence.
Jim Cramer, a total ass clown and overall useless jackass (and overall asshat)
Maria Bartiromo, a money grubbing cunt whos policy of “blow jobs for billionaires interviews” has to end
Larry Krudlow, a man whos voice is WAY too loud for TV (and overall asshat)
and select random “picked from a hat” others.
Then, after this “clean up” occurs I might and I mean MIGHT just actually switch to it once again on occasion….
I concur
I really like CNBC.
Since i stopped watching…
Happy Thanksgivings
HEY ALL YOU AL GORE HOMO LIBERAL OBAMA STREET FAGS…SUCK ON THIS!!
LONDON (AP) – Britain’s University of East Anglia says the director of its prestigious Climatic Research Unit is stepping down pending an investigation into allegations that he overstated the case for man-made climate change.
The university says Phil Jones will relinquish his position until the completion of an independent review into allegations that he worked to alter the way in which global temperature data was presented.
The allegations were made after more than a decade of correspondence between leading British and U.S. scientists were posted to the Web following the security breach last month.
The e-mails were seized upon by some skeptics of man-made climate change as proof that scientists are manipulating the data about its extent.
Appropriate announcement for a Champion of Freedom*-depicting blogpost (aka “Winston Churchill”).
____________
*Aka ,”The Man” for you hippies.
_
another time I would like to discuss W.C. …Jake Gint for Sec of War!!
i am as sick and tired of obama as you ar bu WTF does oba\ma have to do with this?
Just to let you know,as we dined on our Turkey day, Kaiser the Dog sat at the big table, his new little brother Loki was banished to the dog dish for scraps. Kaiser discussed his faith that this day would come soon, he just felt it was delayed for geopolitcal reasons.
Woof
Loki, the Mischief Maker?
You may regret that naming, Ursula K. LeGuin-style.
__________
Kaiser’s breath said it all. He tried to play it off like the food wasn’t that good, but I knew.
I knew.
You’re going to crap on the bed tonight, aren’t ya boy?
_______
Freight traffic on U.S. railroads reached its highest level so far this year during the week ended November 21, the Association of American Railroads reported today.
U.S. railroads reported originating 287,087 carloads for the week, down 6.8 percent compared with the same week in 2008 and down .7 percent from the same week in 2007. Volume was up 2.1 percent from the previous week this year.
While 13 of the 19 carload freight commodity groups were down compared with the same week last year, increases were seen in nonmetallic minerals (26.5 percent), grain (8.1 percent), chemicals (8.1 percent), waste and scrap metal (6.5 percent), grain mill products (6.4 percent) and food and kindred products (.4 percent). Declines in commodity groups ranged from .3 percent for petroleum products to 22.1 percent for crushed stone, sand and gravel.
Total volume on U.S. railroads for the week ending Nov. 21, 2009 was estimated at 32.1 billion ton-miles, down 6.1 percent compared with the same week last year but up 4.9 percent from 2007.
For the first 46 weeks of 2009, U.S. railroads reported cumulative volume of 12,325,563 carloads, down 17.3 percent from 2008 and 18 percent from 2007; 8,801,968 trailers or containers, down 15.6 percent from 2008 and 17.9 percent from 2007, and total volume of an estimated 1.32 trillion ton-miles, down 16.4 percent from 2008 and 16.5 percent from 2007.
Steven Segal must be back in business making sure no trains go under siege again.
CGA into the close
loading under 17
News Alert: Watch out for skank agents. http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2009/1201092skank1.html
I just bought more OVTI. Hopefully it doesn’t go all skank agent on me.
wow… Mr. Le Fly, you have WAYYY outdone yourself!
I am losing money today but having you in the opposite end be forced into this most amazing prose, makes it worthwhile. I am still not covering, but THANK YOU for this timely genius entertaining piece of artwork post. Haven’t laughed this hard in quiet a while. I will consder it as my thanksgiving gift:)
“What do I get in return? I get a guy, a poorly dressed fat guy if I might say so, coming to this web address telling me his “opinions” regarding the market”
“I warned you cocksuckers not to fuck with me.”
” All firemen really do is hang around their stupid little clubhouses, cooking gourmet food all day long—metrosexual style”
“I don’t give two fucks and a gay mule about anything”
“As a result, you ventured off like a homo in the perfume section at Macy’s, to lesser websites, hosted by men in bow ties, who told you “America sucks (dick).”
simply a-fucking-mazing. Good on you!
“Your opinions mean nothing to me, AND MORE.”
Genius
It’s just not the same reading it.
It’s good, but the Fly does so much much better live: http://s471.photobucket.com/albums/rr75/sltshreddr/?action=view¤t=Bestsceneever.flv
cuss words are wind beneath Fly’s wings.