iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,410 Blog Posts

Beware of Options Fuckery

Expect the market to whipsaw all around, due to the imbeciles who call themselves “option traders.” These people are not traders; they’re fucking gamblers.

With the Dow giving back here, I have halted any new buys. Who knows what this stupid market will do?

In normal markets, when the breadth is this good, we should not reverse lower. No fucking way.

There are solid gains amongst most Dow and Nasdaq 100 components. Typically, when stocks are 3%+ green on the day, they do not go negative, barring some sort of new release.

In short, I am not selling, regardless of how we close. Should we “enjoy” an ugly close, I will buy the Monday dip. Should we close strong, I might sell a little on the Monday rip. Either way, sometimes it’s important to think big picture and ignore the 15 minute fluctuations of the stock market.

Think big and you will destroy all of your enemies.

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125 comments

  1. Woodshedder

    Or, think small and have you grammar be destroyed.

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  2. Wiseman

    A wise man once said “It is time for me to build my empire”

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  3. The Fly

    Sorry Wood. I actually post more than once per day. Very little time to proof read.

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  4. Danny

    I think thinkin large and destroying non-believer’s is as preferably as to proper grammar, but Shed we still appropriate you’re help.

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  5. Bad News Bears

    Fly,

    So does that mean you don’t like the NOV NOV calls at 30 and 40???

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  6. The Fly

    I don’t fuck around with options.

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  7. Karl Marx

    Now is the time for Old Beardy – into the close how triumphant he shall be over Buffett’s unruly ear and nose hairs.

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  8. The Fly

    The unbelievable just occurred. We gave it back.

    Un-fucking-real.

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  9. sniper6

    I’m going out to pick up some malt liquor, to celebrate my impending victory. Have my profits ready when I get back.

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  10. Thunderpup

    Options are the American Way.

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  11. Donnymeister knew what he doing again. The Donnymon knows how to bank coin.

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  12. Bad News Bears

    Fly,

    Look at the tape… at 2:25 you could see it was all going back.

    If you did fuck around with options…. anyone you would suggest reading??

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  13. Mushroomz

    But look, we are holding the morning highs! Hope is not lost!

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  14. Bad News Bears Exagerates
    Bad News Bears Exagerates

    Nice to make comments after the fact. What at 2:25 told you that….the fact that 4 minutes later the market was 60 points higher?

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  15. Steve The Neighbor
    Steve The Neighbor

    Fly- What do you say you grab your Speedo and we hit the water park this weekend?

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  16. The Fly

    Bad news:

    Shut up.

    I am a little mad with this pullback.

    Here’s my life:

    Mad, happy, mad, happy, mad, happy, sleep, anxious.

    Repeat.

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  17. Pete Najarian

    I am options fuckery and I will own your house soon fuckers!

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  18. the Market

    I am fucking nuts I tell ya!

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  19. Matt

    bought some CHK back @ 20.50 I don’t see this going below 20

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  20. Woodshedder

    lol at Fly and Danny.

    For the post from a couple of nights ago…

    I remember when Fly actually cared about grammar.

    Now, he’s just about banking coin.

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  21. Danny

    “Here’s my life:

    Mad, happy, mad, happy, mad, happy, sleep, anxious.

    Repeat.”

    lmfao

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  22. Thunderpup

    I love the smell of Gamma in the morning.

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  23. Bad News Bears

    Yes that exactly what told me…. just draw… nevermind

    closing down today… sorry

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  24. The Fly

    Nothing to see here folks. It was just some asshole hedge fund being blown out by a Prime Broker.

    Assets seized and liquidated.

    Up we go.

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  25. W

    strategery

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  26. Steve The Neighbor
    Steve The Neighbor

    … and don’t forget the sunblock this time.

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  27. Matt

    I’ll repeat for any who missed it BUY AAPL huge under 100 sell most of it Tues before they report.

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  28. The Fly

    Wood:

    I really do care about grammar. However, I am too busy to nitpick.

    Since you aren’t doing anything, feel free to edit.

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  29. The Fly

    Long AAPL from 92.

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  30. Bear Trap

    Hi?

    You see this?

    Put your dick in here.

    That’s right.

    [whistles]

    Comfortable?

    [pleb nods]

    Good.

    [whistles loudly]

    Say, you see that thing your dick’s in right now? I forgot to tell you that sometime in the next 45 miutes th-

    SNAP!!!!

    [pleb SCREAMS, bleeds out, falls dead on top of his own severed penis]

    Fin.

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  31. Bad News Bears

    Funny W

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  32. TraderCaddy

    Welcome to Chopfest ’08.

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  33. Woodshedder

    Fly, actually, I’m earning a living and am very busy, but took a break to have a cup of coffee and enjoy your fine content on this rainy Friday afternoon.

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  34. jig

    would you hold AAPL thru earnings?

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  35. Thomas Boone Pickens

    Buy CHK
    I’m smarter and richer than you will ever be!!
    I’m 80 years old smarter!!

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  36. MoonshineDelight

    Friday 3 o’clock.

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  37. The Fly

    Wood:

    It’s not raining in NYC: the only relevant place in the world.

    Jig:

    I would NOT hold AAPL thru earnings, if your cost basis is high.

    Buy a put. Hedge it.

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  38. The Fly

    T. Boone’s fund is down like 90%.

    I am not even kidding.

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  39. the Bull

    MD-yup:)

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  40. boca

    I don’t know whether to be amused or horrified by the amount of destruction and injury to male genitals that occurs daily on this site. Mostly I feel sorry for you guys ’cause it’s gotta hurt bad.

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  41. Aris

    typical options day nonsense. pin some strikes, freak out some shorts, freak out some longs.

    fuck china.

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  42. The Fly

    UPDATE:

    I am eating fish like a savage Viking right now.

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  43. Woodshedder

    Boca, hopefully the only thing injured is the imaginary 2-3 inches that are added on their members for benefit of bragging and egos.

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  44. Hey, my SKFie just turned green – now red again. Wood, love your comments on Twitter.

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  45. Woodshedder

    Fly, only thing relevant about NYC is that the assholes there were a smidge away from bringing down the entire global financial system.

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  46. Woodshedder

    Anon, I do not twitter. Someone has stolen my identity.

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  47. The Fly

    Wood:

    We can still do it. Do not count a good NYC asshole out.

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  48. TraderCaddy

    If T. Boone is down that much maybe he will finally pull those BS commercials where he fails to disclose his self financial interest in wind power.

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  49. Pickled Herring

    …he’s not kidding

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  50. boca

    haha, good point Shed.

    Twitter? I have one rather large problem with that service, and that is trying to always fit something smart about a stock or a trade into 140 characters or less. Seems too limiting. Maybe since they tossed the CEO the remaining guy in charge will get generous and up the limit to a max of 150 characters or so.

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  51. The Fly

    Must suck to be 80 and have your balls kicked around like that.

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  52. Woodshedder

    Actually, I just created a twitter account, and because Woodshedder was available, I’m assuming that no one stole my identity, after all.

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  53. TraderCaddy

    NYC is the center for a good corned beef on rye with an egg cream (at least until Bloomberg puts a fat tax on it).

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  54. The Fly

    I’ve been twittering like crazy over the past two days, mainly because Howard is paying me 2,000 per post.

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  55. Woodshedder

    The name is so gay. Twitter.

    I’d likely use it more if it were Twatter.

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  56. Bear Trap

    [as pleb comes back to life]

    There he is!

    Good news, kid: I sewed your little pal back on.

    [pleb, keying on day-glo pink sutures, acknowledges the reunion]

    Bet you won’t make that mistake again, huh?

    [ashen pleb giggles]

    Drink?

    [pleb quickly downs a neat scotch]

    So…

    [whistling]

    Oh hey – check this out.

    [pleb looks over]

    This is awesome, man – put your weiner in here.

    [TO BE CONTINUED]

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  57. Donny

    80+ and deBalling … watch:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NhVxy6XlsAM&eurl

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  58. CAP

    FLY – T. Boones fund was down like 95% back in the late 90s and he came back to return something like 6000% percent from the lows that year.

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  59. Margin Clerk

    I’m back again after coffee

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  60. The Fly

    insane asylum trading.

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  61. The Contractor

    I wonder how much lexapro this blond broad is on?

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  62. Anton Cigur

    Wood: “I’d likely use it more if it were Twatter.”

    But you’d constantly be taking a nap between posts.

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  63. boca

    “I’ve been twittering like crazy over the past two days, mainly because Howard is paying me 2,000 per post.”

    That’s the only way it makes sense, if you get paid to post. LOL.

    I’m going to start holding meetings of the non-existent ibc recipe club on Twitter.

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  64. The Fly

    UYG and SKF both up, only in retardo land.

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  65. BOOMER

    I hate stocks.

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  66. jig

    maria bartoromo has some good looking DSL’s…

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  67. Karl Marx

    UYG and SKF have seen the future.

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  68. lol

    I can day trade options, but it fucking gonna give me a heart attack. Fuck over 47.5, option trading aren’t for those over 39.5

    LEAPS are much less “gambling” if you sell short term calls every month and own a long term call, but yeah owning options within 30 days to expiration is very similar to gambling.

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  69. The Fly

    Stocks really do suck.

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  70. theinsider

    twitter this-smoked salmon

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  71. Anton Cigur

    I had a sandwich and NOV took a pile of money back.

    No more sandwiches.

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  72. Danny

    LEHs CDS auction is Tuesday.

    bad market + overbought conditions + LEH CDS on Tues = just wait until then.

    to be quite honest, as opposed to perfectly honest, I just yoinked a lil SDS at 92.70 odd.

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  73. The Fly

    Someone is going to die before the close.

    Watch closely.

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  74. The Fly

    Danny:

    Your bearishness is unsettling.

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  75. jig

    sorry guys i bought so the market went negative…WTF???

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  76. theinsider

    spanish guy-carlos slim has been buying a shit load of saks- trades below the fifth ave. location.

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  77. the Bull

    ARE U FUCKING KIDDING ME???????!!!!!!!!

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  78. JP

    Where the Friday afternoon rumor of some global intervention before Asia opens on Sunday

    Fly-Open up that time machine as there has to be one…doesnt there?

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  79. Erin Burnett's Booty Call
    Erin Burnett's Booty Call

    I was counting on this for Oktoberfest money for the weekend. Fuck.

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  80. Danny

    I win, even when I appear to be sleeping or drunk.

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  81. The Fly

    Oh well. That was fun.

    I just threw away the white robe.

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  82. Danny

    lmao, sold 75% at 95.50

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  83. TraderCaddy

    … and this is why I daytrade.

    The Fly Says:

    UYG and SKF both up, only in retardo land.

    Do you mean The Bizzaro World (ala Seinfeld)?

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  84. swan dive

    un fucking believable….

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  85. The Fly

    Just ignore the tape. It’s all lies.

    This is where you can make absurd mistakes within minutes.

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  86. Bear Trap

    What do you mean it’s uncomfortable?

    [pleb yells unintelligibly]

    Too loose?

    AIEEEEEEE!!

    Too tight!!

    AIEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

    Here, let me jus’SNAP!!!

    Son of a bitch!

    My finger!!

    No- wait…

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  87. swan jump

    looks like its raman noodles and colt 45 this weekend for me foolish ass unless we get a miracle before close….

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  88. Small Fry

    35 minutes to go, and I honestly believe we could end up down 300 or up 300. This is fucked.

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  89. CAP

    TED spread is down to 3.63. Ignore the tape. TED spread is collapsing. GOOD for the markets. Just ignore everything else. Its all lies. Lies all of it. We can still close up 500 .

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  90. The Fly

    You were saying?

    100 point swings per minute.

    Wonderful.

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  91. Danny

    Agree Fly, today is a mess.

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  92. The Fly

    Never eat Raman. It’s 100% salt.

    Short cut to a heart attack.

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  93. TraderCaddy

    Cap is correct.

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  94. The Fly

    Ha.

    Now up.

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  95. recusancy

    Hey Swan… Swan’s don’t jump. They dive.

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  96. The Fly

    I am staying long, no hedges, with 30% cash ready for a dip.

    Or, until Warren Buffett dies.

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  97. Danny

    Intraday is overbought, LEH, rally was fading, Tick line moving to new intraday lows, so I said fuck it and went short.

    Thats what the signals were saying. Timing wise, total luck. If anyone says the timing and execution wasnt luck they are wrong. But, luck is the residue of design and I designed the LoBV well.

    sold the rest at 94

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  98. Margin Clerk

    I’m done for the day. All aboard the train.

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  99. the Bull

    I just threw up like the Etrade baby.

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  100. sniper6

    I’m back and I want to know where the fuck my profits are. Who took my profits?

    The Snipette, and the snippets, expect me to take them out for Mexican food later. Yo necessito dinero!

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  101. Small Fry

    Who makes imodium? That’s a pharm I need to buy, because I just took a shit and came back and the market was up 150 points. No more bathroom runs when the market is open.

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  102. Thomas Boone Pickens
    Thomas Boone Pickens

    I’m a crazy olde coot! Go buy CHK and do a jig.

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  103. Danny

    Sorta disagree cap re your LIBOR conclusions. When they put a bug on CNBC it stops workings. Was practically true to the day they started with the VIX.

    I knw vix is much less tangible and important than LIBOR, but they put the bug up, throw it out. I follow LQD, HYG and t-bills as proxies to credit or flight to quality, and they still are wishy washy.

    my 2¢

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  104. Donny

    Come On … I need this fucking stock market to collapse RIGHT THE FUCK NOW. I want to buy DIG @ 28 before the close.

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  105. sniper6

    One of these days, we are all going to miss this volatility. Kinda like my former Italian girlfriend.

    That’ll suck.

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  106. Black Swan Dance

    What a day fellers

    40 pt. jumps before live quotes can even get feed through…

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  107. W

    Ducati got a new motorbike:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fNh0ba2-X_8

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  108. Thomas Boone Pickens
    Thomas Boone Pickens

    One of theses days the market will go up close up and go up some more.

    My 80 year old nut sack should be so lucky.

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  109. yo adrian

    market = enema, that was easy

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  110. recusancy

    I like this Invesco chick. She’s realistic.

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  111. Erin Burnett's Booty Call
    Erin Burnett's Booty Call

    Fuck it, I’m out.

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  112. Margin Clerk

    Sorry fuckers. My boss took over my duties.

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  113. Thomas Boone Pickens
    Thomas Boone Pickens

    Remember theses sell offs will continue until they don’t.

    Hows that for 80 year old words of wisdom

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  114. sniper6

    Time for the 8th inning rally.

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  115. jig

    FXP here?

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  116. swan dive

    holy shit batman

    someone wants the market pinned on 9000

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  117. ALLPROz

    Fly,

    You are becoming extremely MICRO…I fear for your health…
    Can ya get back to a more MACRO outlook..say at least a day?

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  118. Yogi & Boo Boo

    Danny – Nice “lucky” trade today. I agree about the CNBC “bug”, when they take the damn thing off the screen and I need to look it up, that’s then it’ll work again. (sorry for the run on sentence.)

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  119. Danny

    Thanks Yogi, agree.

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  120. JakeGint

    See when I go away for long periods during the day, I miss the context on hilarious shit like this:

    I am eating fish like a savage Viking right now.

    __________

    Sometimes this place is like the quick-edited interstices in between the Monty Python skits…

    __

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  121. T Moe

    gambling, no. Taking people’s money that don’t understand that this market is shit. I’ll do it all day long. Bring on the bulls they don’t scare me I’ll stay put! (pun intended).
    You hate options because you don’t understand them. Just like you hate this volitility. It has most of you crying like babies. Learn to profit from it and stop watching CNBC

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  122. The Fly

    Not true, T Moe.

    I traded options for years. I can do anything you idiots can do and better.

    I opt out of options for a specific reason ,which happens to be none of your business.

    As for the volatility:

    Sure, tough guy. You’ve seen volatility like this before right?

    Fuck off, fuckface. I’m up 55% year to date.

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