The Important Matter of General Contractors

Trust me when I tell you, nobody despises general contractors more than “The Fly.” Unfortunately, due to my wife’s desire to constantly build stuff and renovate, I am in non-stop “negotiations” with these jerk-offs.

One guy, named Frank, is obviously in the Italian mafia. He looks like Phil Leotardo and sends a 6’5/275 pound gorilla to “collect,” after every 1/4th of the job is complete. I am constantly arguing with him and his fucking prices are absurd.

For example, he charged me $850 to skim coat and prime a small wall. Whenever I ask him to do a job, his initial reply is: “that’s gonna cost ya.” Then he proceeds to mark me up 300%. Everything starts at 1,000 dollars. Everything.

However, Frank and I have a certain understanding with one another. He probably thinks I sell crack, being so young and able to pay him 30k in cash on a day’s notice. He, on the other hand, has ample supply of “illegal Mexican’s,” who do everything– soup to nuts.

In short, Frank has probably whacked a lot of people to get where he is today. Who am I to debate his inflationary construction bills?

The way I look at it, it’s good for karma. The more money I give Frank, the higher my stocks go.