The Very Best Shippers

The shipping industry is currently my favorite. In an effort to dispel the notion that my BALT isn’t holding its water, I’ve compiled some statistics, for your fat faces to chew on, while devouring the donuts that litter your filthy desks.

sorted by % away from 52 week high

Sorted by 2 week return

Fannie Mae is the biggest winner of the year, with a YTD gain of 1,000%. Within the small capped universe of grotesque degeneracy, there are numerous triple figure gains. The population is too large to count, frankly, with the SPY +30% for the year. On the downside, once again, are gold and silver stocks. Perhaps they will bounce in 2014.

In an effort to shrink the universe of winners, I screened for stocks with market caps above $5 billion. Here are some of the highlights of 2013.

TSLA +325%
RAD +310%
NFLX +303%
MU +255%
NUS +252%
BBY +247%
ALU +238%
SFUN +196%
INCY +192%
IEP +182%
QIHU +172%

Biotech, casinos, chinese burrito stocks: risk was certainly on in 2013. All of the riskiest names soared, as investors kept climbing the wall of worry. Without a doubt, 2013 belonged to Carl Icahn and his incessant punching of the face of a Mr. Bill Ackman, whose fall from grace was nothing less than hilarious. It’s a mistake to believe the trends of 2013 will be the winners of 2014. Often times the biggest losers turn out to be the biggest winners.

What sector will catch fire? Will biotech continue its run or crash into an FDA jackhammer? My favorite thing about investing in stocks is doing the investigation and fixing on a thesis. Early on in 2013, my thesis was to be long Japan. I was exactly right. At the time I was long SNE around $10. Looking at the list above, I was long NFLX and MU in great quantities, but failed to “hold my butter”; and as a result, I missed out on the run.

For 2014, I am committed towards the procurement of ‘massive winners’, most readily seen in fairy tale books or passed along through cartoons and fictional books. Failure to accomplish this will result in “ultra-violence” being hoisted upon the innocent readers of this site.

Oil and gas stocks were just the marvel of the market; now they are the bane. With them, naturally, are solar stocks–straight down the toilet bowl. Playing The Devil’s advocate, I am going to assume the sector will bounce back, especially since the price oil still stalks the $100 level.

Let’s have a look at the carnage, shall we?

Any favorites?

This market is a buy, right here, right now. This is the easy part of this job, buying when everyone is running for the exits. Lucky for me, thanks to NSTG, YELP and BALT, I haven’t given anything back this week. As a matter of fact, I am up.

Do yourselves a favor and get long, with teeth. You will thank me later.

This sell off is sponsored by a stronger American economy. Wall Street deserves to be punched in the face for selling stocks because the Fed crack pipe might be taken away. Although I love POMO as much as the next man, it is plainly idiotic to be bearish on stocks due to a strenghtening economy.

With some of the proceeds from my NSTG sales, I added to YELP this morning. I realize the market looks bleak and the world is crashing all around us. But oversold markets always look this way before the turn– and I am constructive on my position that Santa Claus will indeed present himself to Wall st this year, smashing the stupid faces of bearish children around the globe.

Off to the gym.

Let’s get ahead of the curve, shall we? Today, SALT is coming public. They are going to raise over $250 million for the explicit purpose of buying Dry Bulk vessels. Its been a long time since a dry bulker came public. I want you to pay attention to this, as it represents a sea-change in the sentiment that has been decidedly bearish behind the chinese wall at our finest investment banks.

This brings me to my next point: Dry Bulk shipping rates are up again this morning.

Let me ask you a question. Why would DRYS cancel an “at the market” financing for $300 million? The answer is childishly simple.

a. they believe business will pick up, appreciably.
b. they feel their share price is undervalued and would prefer to initiate an “ATM” financing at higher prices.

DRYS owns 10 Capesize vessels, and over 40 vessels in total. BALT owns 15 vessels, with an option for another 2. Of the 15, 4 are Capes. With capesize rates approaching $40,000 per day, thanks to a late year push to deliver vast amounts of iron ore to China, both of these stocks are buys. I also like PRGN, but haven’t done much work on it yet.

As an aside, fat women have ruined LULU. Chip is gone and the shares are reeling following a bad quarter. This sell off will likely represent a buying opportunity, but not yet.

Ever since I re-dedicated myself towards the profit of my BALT position, I’ve been, inadvertently, turning into a cackle eating pirate. With the colder climes, I’ve been wearing a black cable knit ski hat and a pea coat, which was gifted to me from Mrs. Fly. Suddenly, I’ve lost the desire to shave and have been growing a beard, readying to become the scourge of the heavy seven seas. If my hornswaggling clients saw me today, they’d think for sure I had lost my faculties, as nothing about my person is gentrified.

Also, it’s worth noting, I am now “bulking” at the gym, gaining about 1lb per week, entirely dedicated towards the building of muscles, so that I might be able to break someone’s skull with just one swing of my cutlass. I realize this terrifies a great many of you, men who fancy themselves “sophisticates”, traveling the United States in search of quality “t-time.”

I couldn’t care less about your goddamned t-time.

Heave to what I am telling you now: I am here to grab the money (extra arggg) and go. The market is weak, but my position is strong. I am going to take the treasure (BALT), one way or another, and you’re just gonna have to sit there and watch me do it. Gone are the days when I’d bothered to negotiate with any of you bilge rats, regular carousers, attempting to snatch my beard. You rapscallions have been taking from me since 2007 and I think it’s about time you gave back.

I treasure your silence, so shhhhhh.

Indeud.

A word of caution for you, the reader class:

In all of my years operating this place of financial hegemony did I tolerate snarkiness, inquisitiveness and most certainly not disrespect. I will ban you from existence. Its not a plain ban that will be punched into your faces, but a full site ban (let it simmer for 7 seconds), one that will redirect you to a man who will teach you what you need to be told. Remember, I am not here to make a career out of the internet, nor am I here to please you. I am here out of the goodness of my black heart, a heart that has seen the very worst of mankind and could recognize the character traits of the very worst just by reading a few comments. Do not test me.

Back to the market:

Momo names are being deballed and tossed into refrigerators to be eaten later. Solar, homies, 3-d, you name it: CHOPPED.

Lucky for me, two of 5 of my largest positions are green: NSTG and BALT, putting me +1.3% for the day. I sold out of some NSTG at the opening tick, as disclosed inside of The PPT. I will keep the remainder of my position until the stock breaks $18.

As for BALT: it is merely fulfilling its ultimate destiny, just like many of you twirling down the sewer pipe of humanity. BALT is a winner and will trade higher. Like taxes and death, this is something that I am very confident in saying: see you at $7.

The first rule of being a stockbroker is to never think with your own pocket. Often times, young advisors make this fatal mistake and price themselves out of the big leagues.  Your clients are richer than you and would prefer to send you less money, if at all possible. Very few people are chomping at the bit to send some 20 something punk out of college hordes of cash to invest in risk assets. They’ll tell you “let me talk to my wife” or “I have my money tied up in real estate.” They’re just lying to you to shut you up.

Many piker-brokers accept the poverty schtick from their multi-millionaire clients because they themselves are poor/disheveled. Some of these aspiring advisors pity their clients plights; and instead of asking for the monster order, they ask for something so small, my dog could cut a check for it.

Go big or go home. There isn’t any other game to play. You either turn your business into a cash generating machine, or you do something else.

The other day I hired someone to do a menial task at my house. After speaking with this gent for 5 minutes, I knew something was “off.” He was too smart, handled himself well, and had an impressive reportoire of vocabulary at his disposal, to be wasting time on such a small odd-job. After several days at the house, I learned that his business used to be 8x as large as it is now and how several accidents  removed him from the path of glory. He spoke of a golden era when he had crews and limousine car phones (the 1980’s) and flew around the country to cater to high net worth clients. All of that, and more, are now nothing more than a faded memory. I could tell by the way he tip-toed around price that he was struggling and gave him a handsome tip for it.

The truth is, I was sad for him and feared his position, for it could happen to anyone, even me. A series of unfortunate events can transpire that can turn success into defeat. If you let the spirit die, well then, you will be singing the same tune about a golden era when you used to be someone important.

Now is the time to try your hand at life, become successful, ask that woman out on a date–do something. Otherwise, you’ll be shining shoes one day, regretting the time wasted when you were young and full of energy and supposed to be building a future, but instead opted to play with your balls.

Oh, by the way, NSTG is soaring and if you were a member of The PPT, you would have seen this message after my partial sale.

Instead of trying to play gotcha with me, why don’t you listen to what I am trying to tell you?