Dramatic Ugly Pinless Hand Grenade Action

Zerohedge ran a story on TSTC and the stock is down 30% on that news! On face value, the story seems to be well thought out and coherent. But to drop it 30% based upon unsubstantiated internet jargon? Holy shit these Chinese stocks are snowmen in the Amazon. Taking the other side of that story, without having one single fact, I’d be very careful taking the advice of anyone, like ZH, who has an ax to grind. As you well know, the only ax I have to grind is on the heads of my enemies.

The market just vomited up all of its gains, led down by CRE and retail. However, to be fair, many sectors and stocks are still green, especially mine. Thus far, 2011 has been one giant jerk-fest. We’ve been unable to go anywhere, up or down. The thing that worries me about this type of action is that it is accompanied by euro-trash debt worries. Nonetheless, Mr. Bernanke and his perverted friends have our back. Like I said before, like organized religion, it takes a little faith and a lot of crazy to believe in this shit. I will have you know, “The Fly” has all of the prerequisites, and MORE, to qualify as a cult leader for this market.

Try not to get sucked into fucked up vortex’s, as this type of intra-day bullshit tends to coincide with epic headfakes. I am not basing my investment philosophy over 1-2 hours. I fully accept losses and expect to get some wrong. But at the end of the day, I win at a criminal rate and there is nothing you or your stupid friends can do about it.

Top picks: see prior blogs.

I am trying to brain wash all of you, by purposely blacking out all of the negative news stories from my commentary. Take it from the guy who gave back over $5million on a VXX trade gone awry last year, all that matters is what’s in front of your face. For the past few months Chinese Lottery stocks have been getting poleaxed, until recently. Expect the shares of Chinese fuckery stocks to take-the-fuck-off, going into Chinese New Year’s. The year of the rabbit will bring splendour [sic] and decadence to the rural farmer who tossed his life savings into the lottery aka the Shanghai composite.

Names like NTES, SOHU, SINA, PWRD, CAAS and EJ are cheap. In addition to that, names like HRBN, JST and PUDA will splish and splash all over the place, making people rich and poor in the process. You simply need a little guidance and mathematical precision (think PPT).

Shares of MBI are taking the fuck off, alongside a host of many others. Former bankrupt entities are all the rage, take a peak at AIG and SIX lately. And, let’s not forget C, CIT, LEA, GM and BCS.

No one loses, at least not now. If you are still short the market, all wrapped up in burlap, you need to have your head examined. I don’t like what’s going on. But my job entails navigating the market to make money, not making a stand based on ideology.

Get past the emotion.

Top picks: UTA, SOHU, MOTR, HRBN, GTE

Aside from UTA and MOTR, I bought HRBN and GTE.

UPDATE: I added 10,000 SOHU

Disclaimer: If you buy the above stocks because of this post, the CFO of your largest position will resign after the bell. And, you may lose money.

The Japanese are one crazy people, offering to buy 20% of the shit coming out of Europe. As spreads blow out in Belgium, Japan is offering to buy 20% of Euro-land bond offerings, which is amazing considering they are levered 200% debt to GDP. It’s like the news accepts absurdities for reality and does not question the logic. But then again, it doesn’t really matter now, does it?

The beastly monsters who are shorting this market, frankly, have no idea what they are getting into. For example: let’s take a peak at the automobile industry, shall we?

One could speculate that the financial crisis was the best thing that happened to Detroit. It’s not a coincidence that F is at new recent highs and all of the automobile parts markers are soaring to new highs. Several years ago these fuckers were dying, even though they were selling 15-16 million cars per annum. Now, they are selling 11 million and making a mint. They fired all of the losers and slashed capacity. I believe GM is operating at 60% capacity, compared to just 3 years ago. The industry adjusted and is ripe to make absurd amounts of coin during this up-cycle. I made 15% on my AXL trade in about 3 days and it ran another 10% after without me. On any pullback, auto related stocks are a buy, especially parts makers.

Solar stocks are a buy too, presciently pointed out by Ragin’ Cajun. The sector is so beaten down, many of these stocks can run 25-50% from here and still be considered “value propositions,” providing oil keeps chugging higher. It is my belief, oil will eclipse $100 and run to $120, before collapsing.

Everything is a trade. You just need to get your timing down, you dumb, grotesque, goat fucker.

Top picks: PWER, SOHU

UPDATE: I sold RLOC and CTCT. And, I bought MOTR and UTA

Forget about of them old time companies, with boring balance sheets and conservative accounting practices. Go get yourselves a nice NASDAQ stock with ludicrous gross margins and ride that puppy all the way to Elysium. Or, if I might suggest, how about trading them for a quick 10-20% profit? Small double digit sized profits will not upset the communist sensibilities of your local magistrate and will help a great deal, with regards to feeding your family, during the next apocalypse.

Southern Gentleman Fly (SGF) sold out of his FAZ today and exchanged it for some Chinese wares: SOHU. Additionally, he took a mighty fine nap this morning, one that will help him bank even more coin tomorrow, believe it or not.

With 10 minutes left in the session, I am up about 1% today, led by gains in PWER, PH, GTE, JOSB, BBRG, SFLY and MOTR.

Back to cookin’ my afternoon kettle of buttery grits.

I made SOHU my largest personal position. And, I ditched FAZ in the process.

After several hours of hard work at sleep aka “going in sieasta in Mexico,” “The Fly” awakens to a much better situation. No longer are the shingles falling off the roof onto the brand new Benz. Now we have ourselves a standard, yet ordinary, nonsensical POMO induced Fed rally, indeud.

Shares of PWER, JOSB, BBRG and PH are performing admirably and the FAZmobile is flat. Once again we feed them cake, as the caviar gets passed around the table, one gentleman at a time.

Into this resurgence, I like MOTR, SFLY and even CRIC. As a matter of fact, I may need to eliminate my silly hedge, for we are going higher.

By the time you finish reading this post, “The Fly” will be snoring like a baby who just finished smoking a Cuban cigar.

We’re due for a pullback. Okay, are you happy? I’m not going to “fag the fuck out” on one small drop, after such a fanatical melt up. I have my own set of issues to deal with, all pertaining to back office bullshit. Long story short: aside from select tech, stocks are pulling in just a little. If I may be so bold, I suggest you walk away from your monitors, in exchange for something fun—like a nap.

Goldman upgraded my PH to a buy from neutral this morning; but the effects are muted. I am enjoying minor declines in just about everything but FAZ, PH, PWER, FORM and JST.

Off to take a rich man’s nap.

Ciao (the most annoying form of goodbye, worldwide)

I hear lots of bullshit tom-fuckery, regarding Europe and how they will inevitably collapse and rape everyone. I hear the same shit about Japan, as eloquently pointed out by Hugh Hendry, calling them a “nuclear bomb strapped onto the chest of the global economy.” Quite frankly and respectfully, no one gives a shit. People are too busy spending their bonus checks, whilst concocting plans to export the low paying factory jobs, that your Uncle needs to eat, to Shenzen, China.

Life is grande if you are part of the haves. As for the “have nots,” let them eat cake.

I’m a big believer in Darwinism and how some are destined to shine shoes, while others piss on the world from atop Cadillac Mountain. Having said that, I step into Monday’s trading with mixed emotions. Inside my personal account, I am heavily hedged with FAZ. For managed, I am 90% long and strong, like two cocks stuck in a hammock.

It is my belief we are in the midst of extending the current bubble into the absurd. The Gilded Era is upon us, where gluttony and hedonism reign supreme. I’ve secured reservations for Per Se, fully satisfied with their egregious $1,200 per plate dining experience and a 4-6 month wait. I am able to do this, AND MORE, thanks to my time machine and space alien magician ways. Plus, it helps a great deal to be blessed with an IQ, just above 155.

As for you: it’s not necessary that you visit iBankCoin on a daily basis, for we will visit you. I’ve taken the liberties to secure all of the locations of our readership and put all of you, mind you, on 23 hour surveillance (everyone deserves a little privacy). Our IT department is developing offensive internet weapons that can effectively fry your PC and cause small explosions inside of your office, which may result in your decapitation.

A great man once asked: “is that a threat?”

Absolutely.
[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x70T7QYhQyE 616 500]

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a_tLat70wMI 616 500]

Pardon me as I offend your northern sensibilities. Today’s rally was one big ol’ giant jerkoff, purported by Northern devils pursuing great acts of aggression towards the gentlemen of the south. As you well know by now, thanks to our resident southern gentleman, Senator Gint and now myself, all of the money is now in the south. Therefore, it goes without saying, when the stock market gyrates (Elvis) in such a way as it did today, it offends the conservative, God given nature, of the south.

Might I add, the great beard of the north, Mr. Ben Bernanke (formerly from the south), is committing treason upon this great nation, thanks to Barack Hussein Obama. As God once told me in my dreams, if you voted for Obama, then you are a communist. If you are a communist, then you are evil. And, as God is my witness (praise the Lord), right hither, if you are inclined to pursue a lifestyle that may be perceived as evil, then I will stop you where you stand, with my shiny new Winchester.

As for the investing climate of today’s session, it was mighty fine if you ask me. Although I bought myself a mighty large plate of FAZ, mostly as a hedge, my other positions did just fine. For the week, I pretty much tread water. However, I intend to make a great deal of money next week, as I slobber over an extra large serving of BBQ breaded chicken livers, grits and gravy.

Ya’ll come back now. Hear?

Your truly and respectfully,

Southern Gentleman Fly (SGF)

God Bless America and God.