Let’s Really Discuss Markets

There are two ways to see this tape. On one hand, the Nasdaq is +42% for the year. On the other, the Russell is down and within the NASDAQ there are dozens of stocks off by double digits. To argue about 2023 is basically a point of reference — your experience in markets and the stocks you prefer to trade.

I prefer to trade the degenerate names that offer outsized returns. I’d rather make 10% per day and brag about it online than squeezing out a dystopian existence making 0.4% on average days. 2023 hasn’t afforded traders the luxury of excess and has instead given us $META, $ADBE, $AAPL and $LLY to trade — grinding out the low fitness/low IQ fats for their spirit and treasure. This is especially foreboding coming off the crisis year of 2022 which saw stocks lower by half.

There once was a market that climbed higher in every facet of its existence. We’d trade it merrily and be happy and rich. My returns were so high, I insulted people with them when I shared the data. No one would believe me because they seemed so outrageous.

In the professional sphere of investing, the returns are paltry. The average returns of hedge funds in 2023 is +5.5%.

The Captains of Industry have produced the following:

Citadel +13%
Bridgewater +2%
AQR Capital Management +19%
DE Shaw +6.5%
Millenium +5.5%
Third Point -3.9%
Pershing Square +13%
Two Sigma Investments +15%

These are rank amateur returns — but their market is much different from ours. When you manage tens of billions you instantly become retarded and your very existence creates bureaucracy. None of those fund managers can hold a candle to me. They’re the equivalent to eating out of a paper bag at the DMV, while I am a 3 star Michelin denizen of excellence. Perhaps if I too directed my energy into being a fantastical hedge fund manager, I’d be a DMV tier shit-head investor and whenever some blogger mentioned me in his end of day missive, I’d have him killed.

For the session, I closed down 102bps and kept a barbell approach heading into Friday: short the fucking small caps, long the tera caps.

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