CAVED INTO THE DARK SIDE

These are the slow summer days of trendless chop — like watching thick molasses spill off a dusty picnic table in the yard. There is nothing going on — not even a collapse. Ergo, and this goes without saying, I have henceforth caved in and allocated 75% to the long side — no hedges.

I have no right doing this — already down 8.8% for August — but I did so nonetheless. Who can stop me?

In my head, I can sneak out of these positions for a quick gain and then swing back around with a full chest and bury the market with my shorts. My imagination runs wild with thoughts like this. Some people dream about winning the lottery to buy stuff — become degenerate swindlers and homosexuals. In spite of the fact that I do not play the lotto — as it is the sandbox for morons — but if I did I’d take all of the winnings to conduct the most hostile takeovers known to mankind.

I’d takeover — fire everyone, then totally ruin the business for sport. I’d do this over and over until I’ve had my fun. Don’t judge me — these are simply idle dreams of a person in a boring tape and in a slump.

Later on this week, Mrs. Fly thought it’d be nice to drive over to a water park — for “the kids.” I fully expect to completely tear my ACL there if under the advice of my wife, which is why I’ll be floating about in the lazy river all afternoon. It’s a stupid thing and all, water parks, bathing in filth and cavorting with the plebs. Alas a parent must make sacrifices for their children and if I didn’t place myself in discomfort for their benefit of joy — what’s the god damned point of having kids. Even so, I do not consider myself to be a great parent — judging by their woke dispositions. However, I still have hope — just like winning the lottery without playing the lotto.