Ladies and Gents,
I’ve been busy all morning, plotting for end of days. As you know, I’ve prepared for this decline in advance and now speak to you from atop the highest of mountains, urinating on everyone below.
The Dow is off by 170 and my UVXY is higher by 9%, placing me in the indelible position of winship. Both my BAC and NVDA short are performing with grace and my DRIP position is idling itself — but of course waiting for an opportunity to pounce.
On the long side, I preside over FIZZ, UCTT, ESPR and HMNY — all of which are doing fine.
I speak to you from a position of authority. None of you have any idea what is going on, because you’ve grown to be fat and sloppy. You’ve grown man-tits and have become slothful thanks to the gross perversions of the bull market. Some of you are so lazy, you transport yourselves inside wheeled chairs and brag about these things on Twitter, in spite of having two perfectly fine working legs. While you were ensconced in the decadence and the excess, I was in the lab getting grizzled, hardened by data, growing my intellectual curiosity and building strategies for this comeuppance. I was born to raze market and meant to trade at this very moment in time.
Watch me as I preside over you and kick your heads in like soccer balls, accomplishing winship,If you enjoy the content at iBankCoin, please follow us on Twitter