I’d Stick Those Pins in Your Heads

First of all, stop offering me advice, period. The older I get, the greater awareness I have that I am genetically superior to you. All of the unsolicited advice strewn across my mind palace, on here and other social media venues, needs to stop–immediately.

But today I want to touch on another topic: QUADRUPLE WITCHING.

You know, fuck all of you guys and your condescending demeanor towards anyone who wasn’t– at some point in their fucked up Wall St careers– a pitched-fork serpent devil circulating in the options pits of Chicago.

“Bro, you have no idea. Watch them pin that stock. Look at the open interest. Bro, I am telling you.”

“Oh, look at that shit. Come here and look, bro; THEY’RE PINNING THEM.”

I recall in 2009 when those fucking pins were being summarily removed from the market and inserted into your fucking faces. Before I drink this entire barrel of wine, know this: one day the market will disjoint from fantasy island and it will happen on quadruple witching. It will rip your option trading faces off and skull fuck your eye sockets until the margin clerk gets around to blowing your brains out.

Fuck your pins and your options and everything else that you find to be “sanctimonious.”

I was down 0.5% today, on my day off, traveling about the Northeast corridor of the United States like a fucking vacuum salesman.

 

 

If you enjoy the content at iBankCoin, please follow us on Twitter