iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,433 Blog Posts

Raising Rates Now is Pure Madness

This has to be the nerdiest profession of all time. Here I am laughing out loud at prospective Federal monetary policy, purely from an unqualified layman’s point of view. I don’t understand this sense of urgency to raise rates. What will higher rates do for the economy? Pray tell me? With zirp rates, the economy is barely kicking ass. The housing market is mediocre, retail sales are meh, and just about everything but Apple is milquetoast. And here we are, with the biggest fucking dollar rally in centuries, post commodity industry collapse, and you’re all talking about rate hikes!?

When I say “you’re” I mean the financial media. What in the fuck are you smoking, son? Aren’t you supposed to use your brain before talking? Enlighten me, the layman, and tell me why we need higher rates?

I suppose Grandma needs higher yields on her CDs.

Interesting side note on banking: I have accounts at several large banks, one of which is Chase. I just got notice the other day that one of my accounts, mid-5 figure account that has been idle since 2009, was going to be handed over to the state of NJ, unless I signed a document claiming it and visited a branch. Upon visiting those fuckheads, they informed me that the account needed to be active or else it’d be deemed an orphan account and its contents shipped over to Trenton for expeditious disposal.

Markets suck giant moose-cock today, so you might as well laugh a little.

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34 comments

  1. xxxhuggiebearxxx
    xxxhuggiebearxxx

    Rates must go up PRECISELY because grandma, and her ilk, are having their retirement destroyed. They could either TAX you to pay for grandma, which you won’t go for, or they can make your stock holdings SINK in valuation so grandma can scratch a few extra pennies on her savings.

    And there you have it…

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    • Dr. Fly

      That’s plain old batshit crazy. Grandma isn’t the core customer at your local retail shop. Grandma is deflation. You need to bleed her by offering less incentive to horde money.

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      • xxxhuggiebearxxx
        xxxhuggiebearxxx

        Ahhhh the ole “Bleed Gramma” strategy….an oldie but a goodie.

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      • yellen

        Agree. Grandma is deflationary. Grandma is not buying a new house, new car, consumer electronic products or creating new jobs by leaving her money in fixed income CD. Unleash MOAR QE and negative rates.

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        • granpa

          Not here, we’ve spent twice what the place cost to fix/replace in the last 18 months.

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      • john

        I am Grandma, earning half on a 5 year cd than on my checking 35 years ago or was it less, maybe 10 years?

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  2. vandamme

    How is that legal? Is this fucking Russia??

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    • Dr. Fly

      I had to make a $10 deposit to keep it from going to the state.

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    • billiejones

      It’s called escheatment. I agree its fucking nonsense. When i worked at a bank i was told to tell the sheeple customers that it was actually a protection for them because it was a law created to prevent banks from forever holding on to the deposits of deceased persons, for their own benefit.

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  3. budh

    If the Fed changes a single word in their narrative CNBC goes into panic mode in order to juice ratings.

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  4. yellen

    If Fly was Fed Chair, negative rates?

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  5. zuul

    Capital requirements and new regulations have created a never ending bid for treasuries. The front end may rise on a hike, but 10-30s are anchored.

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  6. xxxhuggiebearxxx
    xxxhuggiebearxxx

    Also, a service to you fine readers of iBankCoin, i would like you to understand that we are headed much lower.

    Carry on!

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    • zuul

      So happy I just went long.

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      • Dr. Fly

        Huggie is volatile. He might blow up by next week, then recover in full the week after.

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        • xxxhuggiebearxxx
          xxxhuggiebearxxx

          HAHAHAH

          I lost on gold…obviously. Sold that.

          I am in a market neutral position at the moment, hoping for lower prices.

          I have switched from being volatile in the old days to now hedging myself to death such that my account almost never moves. SCARED MONEY…and all that.

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        • zuul

          I mean no offense, of course.

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  7. matt_bear

    so basically Chase just strong armed you for 10 bucks.

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  8. granpa

    I suppose Grandma needs higher yields on her CDs.
    The Bitch could use a bump.

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  9. helicopter ben

    The only way the government could get the economy off the ground is direct money to people. Businesses use QE too much for stock price and not capex. The fed must coordinate with the treasury to literally print $500 billion and give $5000 to every household. Once this happens and people buy cars or pay debts then the economy and inflation will come back for good.

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    • jacked rabbit

      Thank you. Best stimulus is to give every vagabond with a social security number a goddamn Visa/Mastercard Gift card for $5000 and tell em you 90 days to spend it before it goes “poof”…

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      • it is showtime

        ONE TIMER
        Velocity of money slight increase. 1 Q of gdp then right back
        Faking, your, growth, doesn’t work. Stop faking, America. idiots

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    • rigged game

      You are 100% correct on this. It also will give us the 2 to 4% inflation we are desperate for, and it will weaken the overvalued dollar, giving the Fed a chance to raise rates – 2 year to 2%, 5 year to 4% and ten year to 5%.

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      • it is showtime

        I love the word, desperate. you use
        You mean. After 5 years of monstrous qe/stimulus/cutting. We’re desperate for that, inflation. You just made the bear case, thanku

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    • it is showtime

      Sarcastic right?
      I, hope, so. In addition to having obvious flaws in the argument. um, when did America become about free handouts? When did we lose our American-strong work ethic? is it not pathetic, listen to you

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  10. it is showtime

    And the next one said to the other one said and the other one said to the next one said

    ROLL
    Over

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  11. sierra water

    GWPH .. What a day!

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  12. frog

    Regarding your question, Fly, about the financial media. “Aren’t you supposed to use your brain before talking?”:

    Apparently, that would be an offense that would result in the talking head being fired, judging by what we’ve been seeing on the TeeVee.

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  13. fxtradex6

    If Yoda raises rates she’ll serve a single term as Fed. “The force” will be that of the foot kicking her out.

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